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Was gonna throw this in the darts thread as Fordham checking opportunity, or fitba thread as its at Ibrox or stupid/funny thread. But this shites gonna get worse in the next month so we might as well have a thread for it. Picture bottom right makes me think of And has a defo Tom of Finlind vibe. //////////// This crap is gonna build day on day until 11/11. A recent bonkers thing was Christ I hate them fuckers, bit they are entertaining down to their sheer mentalness.

Don't think he's going anywhere soon (hopefully) but apparently Tom Hanks has just been diagnosed with Type II diabetes, which has been lurking in his system for 20 years. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2449508/Tom-Hanks-reveals-Type-2-Diabetes.html He'd better start being careful if life really is like a box of chocolates...

We've already got a thread.

Lolololololol well you shid have access to even more mental stuff then. Post it. Hard to beat the disgusting https://www.poppyscotlandstore.com/poppyscotland-home-gifts/poppyscotland-charity-pin-badges.html?cat=186 Or the belter of https://mobile.twitter.com/giantpoppywatch/status/1024693542474731528 Poppy Watch is a fantastic laugh tbh. They're serious as fuck too

Aye She looks like someone walking in lots of reign I'll get me coat

Funnily enough I tried the Gym a few years back. First visit I got ready and noticed a hole in my trainer I could put my finger in. She complained, Police called and I'm not allowed back.

A Beach Boy walks into a pub and walks up to the bar. * I get a round.

"Silver medal-winners die younger because of their disappointment": https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6272009/Olympic-silver-medallists-die-younger-never-disappointment.html

About the same as yours

Oh I assure you all my jokes are nicked from others. Like this one, about an old guy who died. 99 years old, lived a health freak existence on orders of his wife, she's made him a vegan teetotaller exercise guy etc etc, anyhow they're killed in the same car crash. So they're up at Heaven together and St Peter meets them and gives them the low down on the afterlife, walking about, pointing out stuff. "Pubs over there!" "You've got pubs in heaven?" said the guy, surprised. His wife by his side. "OH aye", said St Peter, "All kinds of pubs, all the booze you can think of. It's Heaven, so you can drink all you want if you want with not even a hangover. You can live however you want." They walk by a MacDonalds. "You've got fast food up here?" said the guy. "Oh aye" said St Peter, "Any type you want, it's Heaven, you can eat anything you want up here." They pass by a brothel. St Peter nods. "Any type you want, it's Heaven after all." The tour ends. St Peter says "Anything to say?" Guy turns to his wife. "You cunt, I could have been here 70 years ago!" It's got the structure of a Mike Reid gag, but dunno, heard it off a drunk guy in the QMU years ago.

There's sycophants and there's a bunch of non-Caucasians believing in the divinity of a man we label a casual racist That's a whole new level of sycophancy right there!

Nice to see the Queen Mother made an effort.

Where the fuckity are the muslimist/Irish extremists ffs. Piss poor show imo.

Dear Everyone Please feel free to create a thread about whoever you want. However, if you don't want to upset Sir Creep, you may wish to contact him to gain his approval beforehand. Otherwise just carry on. DDT

I think it did a mock launch and flew away.

Apparently, scientists have been trying to make contact with aliens for 150 years. In space, no one can hear you... On the subject of colossal wastes of time and money, any news on when the Large Hardon Collider is springing back into action? I kinda miss the LHC and the faux panic it almost caused.

Well....I reckon it's sort of "chocolaty", unless you observe it in Scotland, where it takes on a sort of "battered" complexion.

Er forgive me if I am wrong but surely they have always believed in ET life, ET being not of this Earth and the Heavens being er where one goes for eternal life. I've said a few hail Maryports for good measure ;-)

Maybe they all have galaxy-side assistance. OK, it's too hot to get my coat but I'll step outside.....

I think that you'll know where to find it by now.

The white poppies are for peace, they first came about in 1933. Really? I really must return to my secondary school and beat the teacher who told me that. She waffled on about her white poppy for a whole period! She was also a feminist, socialist, pacifist, die hard labour supporter. So her class was always fun with me being a male monarchist.

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It's true Patrick, the self-same chapter also mentions an Israeli doctor who has a display of the most improbable objects, all united by the fact they were surgically removed from an anus. That's a lot of different bottoms, obviously. But either way, these stories are true, unlike your posting name eh Patrick? If you are the real Patrick, tell us the truth about Cedric Allingham.

They are meant as a way to remember those who have died and those who have served in the military primarily within battles. Profits from sales go to Veterans groups and war orphans/ then there is the poem IN FLANDERS FIELDS by a Canadian soldier of the name McCrae In Flanders fields the poppies blow Between the crosses row on row That mark our place and in the sky The larks still singing bravely fly Scarce heard amid the guns below. We are the dead. Short days ago we lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow Loved and were loved and now we lie In Flanders fields. Take up your quarrel with the foe To you from failing hands we throw The torch, be yours to hold it high if ye break faith with us who die We shall not sleep though poppies grow In Flanders fields.

My guess would be decoration. In the North East of Scotland, we only get the plain red poppy with the black centre. One wears a white poppy to honour the allied soldiers shot for being cowards I believe.