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Anubis the Jackal

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Everything posted by Anubis the Jackal

  1. Anubis the Jackal

    Professional Cyclists

    Azizulhasni Awang won bronze in the Cycling World Cup Kerin race despite beng involved in a mass pile-up and ending up with ths splinter through his leg. That's got to smart a little
  2. Anubis the Jackal

    Gaddafi Guesses

    I reckon Big Mo is pretty much fucked now. He won't get any help from Russia any more (which was probably the reason he has been making overtures to The West these past few years) and Libya seems to have pretty much descended into civil war. I'll bet he holds out for a few more weeks then flees for a life of Bunga-Bunga with his chum Silvio and his Ukranian nurse. oh, and hello again.
  3. Anubis the Jackal

    The Next Piper At The Gates Of Heaven

    Why not, Strawberry Alarm Clock, The Chocolate Watch Band, The Lyke Of Wych, they all belong here or hereabouts.
  4. A short article in the free paper this morning A community of dwarves has set up its own village to escape discrimination from normal sized people. Everyone in the mountain commune in Kunming, southern China, must be under 4ft 3ins tall - and they run their own police force and fire brigade from their 120 residents. Now the group has turned itself into a tourist attraction by building mushroom houses and living and dressing like fairy tale characters.
  5. Anubis the Jackal

    Ralph Stanley

    The offender got twelve years in jail. Quite right too, people who show such a moronic lack of respect to fine musical instruments deserve to be dealt with harshly. B..b..b....but. It's A Banjo forchristsakes. What's the definition of a gentleman? Someone who knows how to play the banjo, but doesn't. What's a definition of perfect pitch? Bouncing a banjo off an accordionist's head and into a skip
  6. Anubis the Jackal

    Cricket Thread. Only Mad Dogs And Englishmen

    You sure? I was there (sadly near the twats of the 'Barmy Army') and the touts were doing tickets for over three times face value, the only empty seats were the corporates after the traditional 2 hour boozy lunch. Unlike 'The Best League In The World' which can only fill stadia to 2/3 capacity apparently. Hate to break it to you but football sold its' soul to Mammon and it's getting harder and harder to care about which team of mercenary millionaires lose to which other team of grasping morality-free oil-sheiks playthings. Anyway, it's going right to the wire now, who's going to get that last burst over the line?
  7. Anubis the Jackal

    Deathlist 2011

    I wouldn't say he's well... he's had Alzheimer's since 2003 and in 2007, he was at the point where he didn't recognize Eunice. Or Peter Falk.
  8. Anubis the Jackal

    Dead Pop Stars

    A sad day indeed. He was the Prince of Pop/ a Fat Brummie chancer.
  9. Anubis the Jackal

    Ideas and Possibilities for 2010

    Maybe he's just personally realised that he's a rubbish presenter. His 'to camera' pieces on the news never fail to get my goat due to his general ignorance, lack of presentational skills and blatant freebie-blagging. And lest we forget his behaviour when the death of Bob Woolmer was announced with all the attendant rumours of foul play
  10. Anubis the Jackal

    Jacques Brel's Imitation Jelly Jewellery

    Coupled with a The Lyke of Wych reunion and that's a real evenings entertainment.
  11. Anubis the Jackal

    Interesting Ways To Die...

    One for Banshees and his dwarf fetish...they're on to you, mate. Drag queens sought for midget murders
  12. Anubis the Jackal

    The Dead Of 2009

    There will be a hungry horse in the fish and chip shop tonight then. Or maybe he'll make do with a pie.
  13. Anubis the Jackal

    Professional Cyclists

    It was a nasty one. Showers of sparks coming off the pedals as they dragged along the tarmac. Rubberneckers, form a line to the left please.
  14. Anubis the Jackal

    Room 101

    Another clagnut of aggravating corporate management-speak. "Does What it Says On The Tin" Yes yes, a very good advertising tagline for paint products that are, er... tin based but utterly redundant when used about anything else; pension plans, 5 year economic forecasts or any other fekin thing.
  15. Anubis the Jackal

    The Dead Of 2009

    Balls! Had her in my DDP team last year I think.
  16. Anubis the Jackal

    Ideas and Possibilities for 2010

    Talking of ailing peers of the realm, how's about Lady Campbell of Surbiton, recently in the news for her opposition to assisted suicide. (She's the wheelie on the left btw.)
  17. Anubis the Jackal

    Interesting Ways To Die...

    I hope his name wasn't Augustus.
  18. Anubis the Jackal

    Cricket Thread. Only Mad Dogs And Englishmen

    ...and with that draw, England win The Ashes!.
  19. Anubis the Jackal

    Cricket Thread. Only Mad Dogs And Englishmen

    Whatever they were, they've shortened today. C'mon you brave cancer-beating drugs-cheat! You can do it!
  20. Anubis the Jackal

    Death Anniversary Thread

    I remember Everybody Talking about that.
  21. Anubis the Jackal

    Kirk Douglas

    Falk remembers he left the iron on.
  22. Anubis the Jackal

    The Dead Of 2009

    I rather think that was the fault of the Verve and their producer (Youth.) it was such an obvious sample that wasn't cleared, and that would always be a 100% royalties claim for the original copyright holder. Having said that, Klein was a grade-A tosspot who single handedly prevented loads of good music ever being released properly (Stones, ? And The Mysterians etc.) so I hope he had a painful exit.
  23. Anubis the Jackal

    The Deathlist Howto

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