Anubis the Jackal

LINUX Trying to upgrade a handed-down eeepc but seems to be exclusively designed for 1980's computer geeks.

Maybe Wiiliam's estranged Auntie could follow suit, thus helping her previously mentioned weight problems Love the primary school level response to not being invited

Azizulhasni Awang won bronze in the Cycling World Cup Kerin race despite beng involved in a mass pile-up and ending up with ths splinter through his leg. That's got to smart a little

I reckon Big Mo is pretty much fucked now. He won't get any help from Russia any more (which was probably the reason he has been making overtures to The West these past few years) and Libya seems to have pretty much descended into civil war. I'll bet he holds out for a few more weeks then flees for a life of Bunga-Bunga with his chum Silvio and his Ukranian nurse. oh, and hello again.

Why not, Strawberry Alarm Clock, The Chocolate Watch Band, The Lyke Of Wych, they all belong here or hereabouts.

A short article in the free paper this morning A community of dwarves has set up its own village to escape discrimination from normal sized people. Everyone in the mountain commune in Kunming, southern China, must be under 4ft 3ins tall - and they run their own police force and fire brigade from their 120 residents. Now the group has turned itself into a tourist attraction by building mushroom houses and living and dressing like fairy tale characters.

The offender got twelve years in jail. Quite right too, people who show such a moronic lack of respect to fine musical instruments deserve to be dealt with harshly. B..b..b....but. It's A Banjo forchristsakes. What's the definition of a gentleman? Someone who knows how to play the banjo, but doesn't. What's a definition of perfect pitch? Bouncing a banjo off an accordionist's head and into a skip

You sure? I was there (sadly near the twats of the 'Barmy Army') and the touts were doing tickets for over three times face value, the only empty seats were the corporates after the traditional 2 hour boozy lunch. Unlike 'The Best League In The World' which can only fill stadia to 2/3 capacity apparently. Hate to break it to you but football sold its' soul to Mammon and it's getting harder and harder to care about which team of mercenary millionaires lose to which other team of grasping morality-free oil-sheiks playthings. Anyway, it's going right to the wire now, who's going to get that last burst over the line?

I wouldn't say he's well... he's had Alzheimer's since 2003 and in 2007, he was at the point where he didn't recognize Eunice. Or Peter Falk.

A sad day indeed. He was the Prince of Pop/ a Fat Brummie chancer.

Maybe he's just personally realised that he's a rubbish presenter. His 'to camera' pieces on the news never fail to get my goat due to his general ignorance, lack of presentational skills and blatant freebie-blagging. And lest we forget his behaviour when the death of Bob Woolmer was announced with all the attendant rumours of foul play

Coupled with a The Lyke of Wych reunion and that's a real evenings entertainment.

One for Banshees and his dwarf fetish...they're on to you, mate. Drag queens sought for midget murders

There will be a hungry horse in the fish and chip shop tonight then. Or maybe he'll make do with a pie.

It was a nasty one. Showers of sparks coming off the pedals as they dragged along the tarmac. Rubberneckers, form a line to the left please.

Another clagnut of aggravating corporate management-speak. "Does What it Says On The Tin" Yes yes, a very good advertising tagline for paint products that are, er... tin based but utterly redundant when used about anything else; pension plans, 5 year economic forecasts or any other fekin thing.

Balls! Had her in my DDP team last year I think.

Talking of ailing peers of the realm, how's about Lady Campbell of Surbiton, recently in the news for her opposition to assisted suicide. (She's the wheelie on the left btw.)

I hope his name wasn't Augustus.

...and with that draw, England win The Ashes!.

Whatever they were, they've shortened today. C'mon you brave cancer-beating drugs-cheat! You can do it!

I remember Everybody Talking about that.

Falk remembers he left the iron on.