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Anubis the Jackal

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Posts posted by Anubis the Jackal

  1. Completely off-topic I know, but please take the time to help Save The Pacific Northwest Tree Octopus


    Although the tree octopus is not officially listed on the Endangered Species List, we feel that it should be added since its numbers are at a critically low level for its breeding needs. The reasons for this dire situation include: decimation of habitat by logging and suburban encroachment; building of roads that cut off access to the water which it needs for spawning; predation by foreign species such as house cats; and booming populations of its natural predators, including the bald eagle and sasquatch. What few that make it to the Canal are further hampered in their reproduction by the growing problem of pollution from farming and residential run-off. Unless immediate action is taken to protect this species and its habitat, the Pacific Northwest tree octopus will be but a memory.

  2. I reckon Big Mo is pretty much fucked now. He won't get any help from Russia any more (which was probably the reason he has been making overtures to The West these past few years) and Libya seems to have pretty much descended into civil war.

    I'll bet he holds out for a few more weeks then flees for a life of Bunga-Bunga with his chum Silvio and his Ukranian nurse.


    oh, and hello again.

  3. A short article in the free paper this morning

    A community of dwarves has set up its own village to escape discrimination from normal sized people.



    Everyone in the mountain commune in Kunming, southern China, must be under 4ft 3ins tall - and they run their own police force and fire brigade from their 120 residents.


    Now the group has turned itself into a tourist attraction by building mushroom houses and living and dressing like fairy tale characters.




  4. I thought this thread would be as good as any to post about a death by banjo.


    A violent argument erupted and Mr Brown, 69, was bashed repeatedly with a banjo before the neck of the instrument was rammed down his throat.


    The offender got twelve years in jail. Quite right too, people who show such a moronic lack of respect to fine musical instruments deserve to be dealt with harshly.




    It's A Banjo forchristsakes.


    What's the definition of a gentleman?


    Someone who knows how to play the banjo, but doesn't.



    What's a definition of perfect pitch?


    Bouncing a banjo off an accordionist's head and into a skip

  5. Does it matter a f'uck?

    The Footie season has started and nobody gives a toss.

    They still had tickets for sale today, no bums on seats because nobody cares.


    You sure?


    I was there (sadly near the twats of the 'Barmy Army') and the touts were doing tickets for over three times face value, the only empty seats were the corporates after the traditional 2 hour boozy lunch. Unlike 'The Best League In The World' which can only fill stadia to 2/3 capacity apparently.


    Hate to break it to you but football sold its' soul to Mammon and it's getting harder and harder to care about which team of mercenary millionaires lose to which other team of grasping morality-free oil-sheiks playthings.


    Anyway, it's going right to the wire now, who's going to get that last burst over the line?

  6. Probably mentioned many times already but wikipedia says Eunice Kennedy's husband democrate Sargent Shriver is alive and well at age 93, any thoughts on his health?


    I wouldn't say he's well... he's had Alzheimer's since 2003 and in 2007, he was at the point where he didn't recognize Eunice.


    Or Peter Falk.

  7. Mihir Bose, the BBC's sports editor has quit with immediate effect for "personal reasons". I wonder why he was in such a rush to quit, maybe he's ill? I need to know.
    Maybe he's just personally realised that he's a rubbish presenter. His 'to camera' pieces on the news never fail to get my goat due to his general ignorance, lack of presentational skills and blatant freebie-blagging.


    And lest we forget his behaviour when the death of Bob Woolmer was announced with all the attendant rumours of foul play


    When BBC sports editor Mihir Bose was awoken in the middle of the night by the sensational news that Pakistan coach Bob Woolmer had died at the Cricket World Cup, did he leap into action, thanking his source and throwing himself into the story with his usual gusto? Did he fcuk!


    "It's not a big enough story for a sports editor," he mumbled sleepily into the phone before popping back into bed to give that huge head a few more hours beauty sleep.


    So the reporters already at work, or on the way, got to work, began detailing the story and following leads. By the time all the higher profile programmes were due to go to air, out of the blue came Mihir Bose, riding out of the sunrise and stealing sound bites from colleagues left, right and centre, giving the impression that he'd been up all night, on what was, after all, a huge sporting story, and gravely intoning facts that had just been spoon fed into his fat face.


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