TQR

Oh cunt.

14th October 2020

I’ve always pondered the logic of frying an (imitation) cheese sandwich in (imitation) butter, and calling it ‘grilled’.

Really? That is remarkable.

I can’t believe people are planning to step outside and “Clap for Boris”. Honestly, how fucking dare they devalue the round of applause for the NHS workers, the real heroes of this crisis, by giving a round of applause to one muttering prat who’s a bit poorly sick? He doesn’t deserve a round of applause or any further form of recognition, any more than the other 70k or however many sick people in this country.

Weds: 802

Glad I could be of service. I appreciate scrolling up is hard in these times.

I was typing a reply to this but I forgot what I was going to say because I was distracted by my phone’s exemplary autocorrect function:

One of my favourites of theirs.

TWAT AT THE END OF THE KEYBOARD!

How dare you insult @Toast like that.

THANK YOU READ THE POST ABOVE YOU NUMPTY FUCKER. PS. Get an avatar.

Saw a report from the Twitter account of Laura K***sberg that Big Job is in intensive care and has asked Raab to deputise for him. EDIT: Here. BBC link.

I wonder if one of the lesser-known symptoms of Corona is being an illiterate fucking turnip?

Tuesday 725

14th April. Likely a Covider.

The campaign starts right here for a middle finger reaction. Would very much come in handy!

Tom

Brenda is everyone's mum on Twitter.

I loved this moment in the Queen’s speech earlier.

Excuse another politics-based topic, and also excuse the disgraceful UK-centric nature of it, but the Labour leadership election will be commencing early doors next year, arguably the most important one for a long time given the enormity of the seat deficit they've got to recover in 5 years or less. Plus we've got a poll for some kind of leader of something in Americaland so why shouldn't we have this? Who will it be? Who should it be? Those are likely two very different things. Vote who you reckon it will be, then bitch and moan about why it shouldn't be them here. I reckon it'll be Keir. I'd rather it was than the other favourite, Rebecca Wrong-Daily.

So far today, our new LotO has appeared to be a very measured individual on Marr, pledged to assemble a cabinet that is diverse in the sense of both inclusivity and ideology, commented that his job for now is to scrutinise the government without expecting the absolutely impossible and has said that, post-Covid, austerity is not the answer to get us back on track. So, Keir's Shadow Cabinet, some of whom will also be part of a shadow Covid-19 committee: Angela Rayner: Deputy Leader (as elected) & Chair of the Labour Party (also C19) Anneliese Dodds: Shadow Chancellor of the Exchequer (also C19) Lisa Nandy: Shadow Foreign Secretary (also C19) Nick Thomas Symonds: Shadow Home Secretary (also C19) Rachel Reeves: Shadow Minister for the Cabinet Office & Chancellor of the Duchy of Lancaster (also C19) Jonathan Ashworth: Shadow Health Secretary (unchanged) (also C19) Nick Brown: Chief Whip (unchanged) Angela Smith, The Baroness Smith of Basildon: Shadow Leader of the House of Lords (unchanged) Valerie Vaz: Shadow Leader of the House of Commons (unchanged) Emily Thornberry: Shadow International Trade Secretary Ed Miliband: Shadow Business Secretary David Lammy: Shadow Justice Secretary John Healey: Shadow Defence Secretary Jonathan Reynolds: Shadow Work & Pensions Secretary Rebecca Long-Bailey: Shadow Education Secretary Jo Stevens: Shadow Digital, Culture, Media & Sport Secretary Bridget Phillipson: Shadow Chief Secretary to the Treasury Luke Pollard: Shadow Environment, Food & Rural Secretary (unchanged) Steve Reed: Shadow Communities & Local Government Secretary Thangam Debbonaire: Shadow Housing Secretary Jim McMahon: Shadow Transport Secretary Preet Gill: Shadow International Trade Secretary (unchanged) Louise Haigh: Shadow Northern Ireland Secretary Ian Murray: Shadow Scottish Secretary Nia Griffith: Shadow Welsh Secretary