maryportfuncity

Catch AIDS, according to this report there are people out there actively seeking infection. Do any of you with more expertise in psychology than a simple Cumbria have a F*****g clue what that's about?

Danny Flores AKA Chuck Rio. Bad week for ageing musicians eh?

I take yer point about no chimps allowed but if we presented a simple mental/physical task - like maybe building a little wall with some wooden bricks - and pitted Cheetah against Jake Lamotta and Muhammad Ali..... I'll get me coat.

Top Gear may go if our man can't get his chops together or if those nasty safety conscious fascists tighten up the rules, or summat.

I might have GUEST you were working up to some brainless response along those lines. I defy you to look at that picture of Mary Travers - back a few pages on this thread - and then eat fattening food with a clear conscience.

A thesp who trod the boards many years back, best known as the first wife of Brucie!

Surviving British combatants mind; Harry Patch, Henry Allingham are certs for obits and coverage. I F*****g hope they are anyway, my Old and in the Way CPDP team is banking on one result from that brace this year. Winter's comin' cold damp mornings, old old lungs, c'mon guys!

Re the awards, if and when I think Lady Clarissa on the Dickie O' thrad has probably already set a record for the longest average post. She's yet to post twenty times but she's probably managed more words than others who've topped 100 posts. Detailed and dedicated stuff too, and she seems appreciative of our interest in her all time hero.

If the ten ton-up candidates on my Old and in the Way thread could be persuaded into my work-in-progress porno masterpiece; 'Longevity Lube Action' would they qualify for a bonus point, or do they have to have made their contribution before the competition started?

You've got summat there TLC. I think an awards ceremony - held on a thread unveiled over Chrimbo - would be brilliant. If the mods managed it and only gave awards to the rank and file, and drive by posters it would bring peace and harmony on us all like one big happy family, or summat.

Hell, I'd no idea he was still alive, I mean he isn't now, obviously, but you get my drift. On a totally trivial note we should also mark this death for the rock fans. Sir Malcolm conducted the orchestra for the excrable but historic performance known and hated as 'Concerto for Group and Orchestra.' The Deep Purple album that comes between the heavy psych period that ended with their third album and just before the heavy blast of 'Deep Purple in Rock.' All told, if he kept his sanity for 36 years after close personal involvement in that abomination the man is to be respected.

Indeed Tempus, I take yer point about longevity. Mind, recent pictures of Andy Fraser show a very thin man. TBH I put his own thread out partly to attract comment in the hope someone would know more. On the evidence of it catching traffic fairly quickly there's a few people out there with fond memories of a somewhat overlooked band. I've heard rumours that he was prone to Freddie Mercury type partying off and on which would mean he's probably more likely to peg out soon than Magic Johnson.

Lady G, it's miles for most of you to The Miners if I do win. Personally I'd be surprised if my oldsters cream every team. But it's gonna make it interesting. I did consider a similarly sick squad made up entirely of amputees but couldn't assemble enough likely candidates. Also famous Canadian limbless types likely to die in the next twelve months are very scarce.

I notice Hein is hangin' in there on 1997 posts, party time soon eh?

It's bad news for Bush if Bin Laden dies now because it allows time before the mid-term elections for it to become bloody obvious that the 'insurgency' and 'war against terror' are nothing of the sort and that the various factions are just as dangerous without him.

Wasn't that title supposed to be ironic because the whole band were bordering on midgets?

Re speed records, however fast he was going there were no official timekeepers there. Records count when they're achieved within the rules. So - for example - there's little doubt that if Donald Campbell had finished his fatal run in Bluebird in 1967 he'd have broken the world water speed record and taken it over 300 mph. He averaged just under 300 on the first run but was estimated to have been doing close to 330 when the boat somsersaulted, I don't know if the thought of his record, or one of the turbine blades were the last thing to go through his mind. Either way, he crashed short of the end of his measured mile and was credited wi' nowt.

Despite my tonnage of posts on this forum I've only just found out about the movie;Au Pair Girls, a kind of soft-core spoof from the early seventies featuring our hero. Apparantly George Harrison returned from doing some promotion for an album and found the movie being filmed around his house. Has anyone on this forum actually seen this?

I don't think she'd get a broadsheet UK obit, but I bet the tabloids would do a piece on her death and that would count for DDP purposes. Right then, I'm havin' her. She's very confused, she won't be able to identify me afterwards, like. I'll get me coat.

Would if it were true, like. Sez summat about the guests mind when they haven't the brains to twig the irony and subtle wit with which they are abused.

Well CP had the team well in advance, a real act of faith on my part considering the average age. Given the bonus points for porn stars, Canadians and the rest I thought it worth risking this lot, since their low individual value acts as a kind of balance to all the other temptations on offer. They'll generate very few points each when they die but like an old anything I conceived them more as a slow but sure means of getting somewhere. I'll tell you now, if everyone of these bastards is breathing in a year's time I'll seriously consider my position hereabouts. If CP sez it's okay, then it is. You'd have to give MPFC Jr some credit for knowing who the three oldest living persons were. The whole caper was inspired when I realised the world's third oldest person is Canadian. I think the average age of the team clocks in somewhere around 105. So it'll take a couple of them to match AIDS riddled Canadian pornster Lara Roxx. Meaning, I'd say, it's fair. TBH I have a hunch the Never Came To Maryport team might clock up more points than the oldsters anyway, some of that lot have months at most.

Call me old fashioned but the ones that trouble me are those professing innocence over and over. By this point they've got nothing to lose so maybe - like - they are innocent.

Absolute class this one; final statements from those about to depart Death Row.

You came here, read summat he wrote, got worked up and ended up firing back by accusing him of being summat he isn't. Although I think the real point of his erudite post was to point out that - as with a load of us round here - being sick doesn't mean we're thick. Go well

Lady C, you seem to like sitting around in the middle of the night swapping observations on line! You're deffo one of us.