Lord Fellatio Nelson

I've only just seen the disagreement over sticking 'Happy Birthday to..' people in threads where Toastie thinks they shouldn't go and, personally, I agree with her. So, as noble as it is for GC to recognise that some people are still alive out there to have birthdays to celebrate, maybe they can all be put in here. This should satisfy all, everybody and nobody in equal measure. Gooseberry, this is your very own place on here. Enjoy.

Ok chums, this is the thread where you can exclaim "Its cold!!" or "Ive got to take Tibby to the vets to be de bollocked" (or summat). Basically, you can put anything into here that doesnt neccessarily fit or belong in other threads. It should keep the Stasi from complaining about posts meandering off topic/post quality blah f'ucking blah. Anyway, as a first post, I ponder this question. Lesbians. Have they got life licked?

Has anybody posted about James Whales cancer diagnosis? Ok, you have....

Mods, feel free to smack my arse if there is already a thread on the subject. Presenters. Whatever happened to Michael Aspel? What about Peter Marshall, presenter of Miss World and continuity announcer for ( IIRC) Thames Television in the 1970s? What happened the the old fashioned presenter, eh? Answers on a Post Card...................

Maybe its been done, maybe the mods can merge?? Tempus gave us the Brian Cant thread and, at the mo, that utter legend ( another one that shall not appear on ANY Death List ) Derek Griffiths is appearing on Corrie. He was also on a recent Silent Witness episode and, to be fair, he is looking well good. Any news to report on any other Playschool/Playaway stalwarts??

Fucking hell, you are still about then!!

You may have heard in the news today that Kleenex ( MK and Deathsperms favourite tissue ) has now, after 60 years, decided to remove the term 'Mansize' on it's boxes as one little boy asked his mummy if that meant boys, girls and ladies could not use them. This, of course, had the Twitter brigade out to castigate the company for having such a sexist term in these times of ours, or summat. Add to that the 'Jazz Hands' replacement for applause at Manchester University and a whole shit load of other things, I was wondering if we can get up some sort of list/ suggestions that would truly placate the current generation? How about a demand that Manchester be renamed Peoplechester? Being manly? How about Personly? Wankers

Fucking good, that one, eh, Toastie!!

Yep, somebody else for you to go and like every one of his fucking posts. That will please him no end.

She was 96 and had dementia. How the fuck is her death a shock.

Has anybody seen that Advert where the two little girls walk into the lounge and proclaim that "Dad, its time" or something as they produce a box of hair dye ( think grecian 2000). What kind of a crock of sh*t is that? Dad is single/widowed/divorced. Dad isnt in a relationship Dad hasnt had his leg over. Dad is a sad twat. Daughters decide that, to remedy the above, he needs to get rid of his grey hairs. Viola!! Dad gets a bird, daughters ( sitting in a single Armchair ) do the old "Palm to Palm" hand slap. Result!! I need not tell you that this advert is American, I certainly dont wish to appear anti American, we have some valued cousins on this forum, however, I dont think anybody could have made this advert outside of the States. Perhaps, to redress the balance, somebody would care to hold up some more British examples of inane, God awful, toe curling advertising.

I was thinking about him the other day. I pondered the thought that, when he finally died, football would die with him. At this moment, that is how it feels to me, a man that sat at the same table as Pele as one of the greatest footballers to have ever walked this earth. Dramatic? Maybe. To those of us of a certain age his loss truly is the end of a chapter, a man the like of which we will never see again.☹️

Worst jobs. We have all had them, well probably. Ive had two ( apart from the c***s I work for now) the first at the age of 18 when I worked at a waste paper plant. Fucking awful, shit money but the perks of finding zillions of thrown out porno mags was a bonus. The second job was installing satellite dishes when I left my current employers, before stupidly returning. The job was easy enough but you had to work like a bastard to earn a living and their 'pressure tactics' forced me to tell the gruff South African foreman to stick the job up his arse. Happy days, not.

I see the environmental activist, Swampy died of a heart attack. He refused to have a bypass.

We seem to be going through a phase of UFO, Bigfoot, See Monsters, et, al sightings & recordings. While most of it is utter bollocks, with a large dollop of CGI thrown in, there are some that do make you think. I mean, we live in an age where most people have mobile phones which can take video recordings and photo's. At some point, certainly, somebody will record the real thing, should the real thing exist, of course. The thing is who is going to believe them?

Well, I will be in and out etc.

If anybody can sniff out their corpses, you can!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It has already been established that the gun Oswald used could not have been fired in quick succession at the speed it needed to be done to be the murder weapon. It also lacked the accuracy required to be certain of a hit that would be fatal. These tests were carried out by expert marksmen. Soooooo. A documentary, quite some time back, focussed on the grassy knoll and a car parking area, secluded, at the top of it. It was secluded enough and close enough to have fired the bullets to the FRONT of Kennedys head. They even found a photo and using, at the time, up to date technology, traced a shadowy figure at the top of the knoll at the time Kennedy was shot. There is no doubt that Oswald, a decent marksman, fired his gun and he may even have hit Kennedy, but not the volume of shots. It wasn't possible. . Whether he believed that he was the sole assassin or was aware that he was the decoy, we shall never know. Who killed him? The Mafia? I don't see it. If it had come out that they had, the law enforcement agencies would have gone to war with them in a way they had not done since, well, Al Capone. Why kill him and then live under the prospect of being unable to do what you were doing before? Doesn't make sense. Was it his own security services? Probably.

Yeah, we will now be putting the ENIC OUT banners away and stop chanting 'Levy Out' on the terraces. That is the c**ts 12th appointment, seriously, I am all out of fucks to give now. They may as well put Schofield in charge for all I care.

See? Lardy was bang on!

Surprised to find that this lady, a staple of British TV comedy & drama of the 60s & 70s is 90 years young. Quite prolific in theatre land to, so I'm lead to believe. Toni Palmer.

Elsewhere, on't web, Lardy was convincing me that he was dead and they were just waiting for the right time to announce it. Possible.........