Godot

Let me tell you RA it happens to a lot of us at that age .

Seamus Heaney's last text, Noli Timere, I thought was quite classy. The BBC website had a little quiz this morning. I missed two. It got me thinking to what extent people prepare their last words and, if so, what fellow deathlisters might choose? Rather than start a new thread this one would seem appropriate even though they may not (yet) be famous ones. You'll have to wait for my last words (yes, that would do just fine). So what would you be happy to have as your last words?

. with same ridiculous commentary. How American can an accent get? Some of the footage looks suspiciously familiar.

Fixed Absolutely. Marcus Brigstocke is about as funny as having both your grandparents suffer strokes at the Christmas dinner table, in front of the kids. He's not that funny. Shouldn't this and other recent posts be in the shit comedians thread? Oh, there isn't one. Is there a thread for Radio Four? That has more than its fair share of unfunny comedy shows these days while I'm sorry I haven't a Clue stands head, shoulders and knees above the rest. Miranda Hart isn't a munchkin either, so she'll have to wait her turn too.

Oh yeah, I've heard of them, I believe they use the same monastery as the Fish Friars.

About time I had a faller for the DDP, too many of mine still up and running.

Because you're a lightweight My brother and his lovely wife came round last night. I drank three bottles of wine, and the other three drank 12 cans of Blackthorn, a litre of vodka and a litre of Jager between them. Me and my good fellow were both fine this morning. By fine, what I actually mean is our heads were banging like a Scouse hooker down Merseyside docks, we'd forgotten our own names and all of our internal organs had melted. I'm still in my pyjamas eating Hula Hoops and wondering why my liver is crying. Go easy on the Hula Hoops. They aren't good for you.

Just seen this Harry. I too had a weird visit to TOTP in my late 30s. Don't tell me that you too were mates with the producer. It was a tiny set, smoke and mirrors, with camera booms flattening the kids brought in to dance.

Improve your sprinting with a nice run in the woods. And don't forget your absorbent underpants.

I had two cars written off under Thatcher, one during the miner's strike. A grandma and two aunties died and our cat got run over - all under Thatcher. I got crap A-levels too, but that was under labour after they turned my grammar school in to a comprehensive. The Tories could have reversed that but they didn't - under Thatcher.

Is it wishful thinking that he might commit suttee? I don't suppose they'd allow that at the crem. Pity. What a worthless shit he is. And that's being kind.

Just looking at Martin Amis on telly (Newsnight), going on about Margaret Thatcher. He looks remarkably jaundiced, like a carrot.

I'm surprised we haven't seen an up to date interview with Scargill. I wonder if he's not too well? I bet there were a few of the old guard on all sides only hanging on to outlive her. Let's face it, whatever you think, she was one of a kind. I thought she did a good job for motorway service stations. Before Thatcher they were shit, stank of piss and served up cardboard egg sandwiches. OK, they've regressed again, but for a while underThatcher you had some pretty outstanding motorway bog cleaners while egg and cress in granary wasn't half bad.

Just for the record a piece of unique giant squid action, only three months llate.

As yet, I am sad to say, the world of topiary seems to have had nothing to say on the passing of Baroness Thatcher. I thought there might have been a Thatcher Bush photograph somewhere on the net and indeed there was. But not quite what I had in mind. I would have thought a nice bit of box privet clipped in her likeness could make a handsome tribute. Some might suggest Yew for a change but she never favoured a yew turn.

Maybe they heard it was carrying XXXX and they wanted to blow up the train. To save humanity from being inflicted with that kangaroo piss they call beer. Roo piss tastes nothing like XXXX beer. Lucky Roo.

What do you mean?

Banksy says ivy's OK.

It's been known..... A "clip" from his lesser known topiary epic, Die Hard Back.

. It's all Greek to me.

Indeed. Except who will have a thread to himself come January 1st? I see what you mean, if he lives that long.

Given that he's an author wouldn't it be tidier to put him in to the author's thread? It's what it's for after all.

Cause so far unexplained. Could have been staged to resemble a suicide I suppose... Almost enough for a DDP theme team.

DDT this is brilliant, the sort of post that draws me back here and one which I'd love to read as an article in my Daily Dismal Telegraph. Nothing can bring Nigel back but a public burning of this witch would indeed brighten our Easter weekend. Alternatively she could be dropped on North Korea to inject a few of her story lines in to the humdrum lives of every day country folk in Kim Jong-un's regime. How do appalling people like this get to run things and spread so much misery? That's Whitburn, I mean.