Magere Hein

Jalal Talabani, the new President of Iraq. regards, Hein

I've read his novels Herzog and Humboldt's Gift. Damn fine author. regards, Hein

Again, that rather depends on where you live and how long you lived. My guesstimate is that most Europeans exceeding 40 remember Vera Lynn. I doubt we'll ever meet her, though. regard, Hein

I must admit that I admired this rant. A bit. Little abuse and in understandable English: it's far superior to the rants we normally read. The argument, if there is one, is silly, though. This forum is for discussion of the, hopefully short, future of celebrities. You don't have to like it, nor join it. The point is that our own achievements, or lack thereof, don't matter. Even if we were all Nobel prize winners, incredibly rich businesspeople, trustworthy politicians and record sale musicians the messages on this board wouldn't be any different, or in better taste. We may or may not be w**nkers. I suppose it takes one to know one. regards, Hein

Where's Eileen when we need her? regards, Hein

Signature material. regards, Hein

The current bout of "Vatican watching" reminds me of the times that dictators like Breznev, Franco and Tito were on the last stretch. Those buggers took days and weeks to arrive at the finish. Let's hope His Holiness gets on with it. 'Aven't got all day, you know... regards, Hein

I used to know a car dealer named God. Rumours have it he's dead. regards, Hein

You might not want her to see IYG's latest posting; it might put her off "prodding" for life. I'm such a bad influence. Rats! My mother always warned me not to hang out with such people. regards, Hein

Could well be. Mebby they can send up some nicely coloured smoke at that time? regards, Hein

Infection of the urinary tract, now. No, I'm not going to make a joke about that. Here's the story. regards, Hein

Her uncle did. Although I don't know the exact rules of Pope elections by the cardinals, I don't expect them to chose an unwilling candidate. It is. regards, Hein

A friendly little car crash for Schumi, perhaps? regards, Hein

That is a matter of opinion, rather than fact. Which doesn't change the fact that he can resign. regards, Hein

I take it these characters mean 'clumpy shoes'. regards, Hein

I'm not a Roman Catholic, nor a theologian, so I can't say much about John Paul II's skills in that subject, other than this question: what makes his theological insights better than mine, yours or my pizza delivery boy's? Make that: "I don't know anything about Hein." What on Earth makes you think I take pleasure in seeing a frail old man struggle to speak? I cracked a joke about the most recent public performance of the CEO of the world's largest entertainment business, not about Karol Woytila. I'm certain he's suffering, and I pity him. However, we should remember that this particular old man chooses to be Pope and do whatever he does in that quality. The Pope is a fair target for satire, just as any other authority, and so are his actions. You don't like my joke. That's your priviledge. I won't deny it's in rather bad taste, but your ideas about my moral quality seem to rely on bad reading and jumping to conclusions. I don't particularly care how many people will mourn my eventual death, I won't be there to witness it. Yet it's good to know that while there will never be another Hein, there will be another Pope soon after this one sheds his mortal coil. There will also be more people to crack jokes about him. regards, Hein

Clumpiness? The state of being clumpy. Strange. My web browser thinks it's ok. regards, Hein

I saw some footage of His Holiness at work. At such occasions he (and his predecessor) used to bless the spectotors in tens of unintelligeble languages. This year he did it in only one: Grunt, a language everybody speaks, but nobody understands. I was quite touched by this novel approach. regards, Hein

Yes and no. Even if the date on which people die is completely random and independent, one would expect a certain clumpiness in the occurrences of hits in any sample. The last observation was quite clear in Europe in the summer of 2003. ISTR that in a normal year death rates peak at early spring and late autumn. Surprisingly few people die on February 29. One should always venerate admins and operators. They just might be a BOFH. regards, Hein

Ah, so he's a candidate for upper class twit of the year, then. regards, Hein

I've never heard of that geezer. World famous in the UK, perhaps? A more interesting question: when will he try that? If it's this year he may well end up in the 'near misses' thread. regards, Hein

Besides, as I've read somewhere: it is not enough to succeed. Friends must be seen to have failed. regards, Hein

I didn't realise the Dutch were almost as blinkered as USAns when it comes to defining the world as the country you live in. Well done, you spotted my little joke. I could have put in a smiley, but that's much like people who tell tell a joke and ask: "Got it?" regards, Hein

Interesting suggestion. As an aside: last week Dr. Lou de Jong, the Dutch war historian, died. He was world famous here, but next to unknown outside the Netherlands. I knew his health was deteriorating, but I didn't suggest him to Deathlist.net, because of the famousness test. I suppose Mrs. Gies will pass... regards, Hein

ISTR the US Constitution forbids presidents of foreign birth, which would make Kissinger ineligible. regards, Hein