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Jeremy Beadle

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Met him and had a lengthy conversation once, he had a habit of turning up at the oddest events. He was incredibly well informed on areas like the paranormal and well read on a range of research about things like mystery animals; which is - more or less - how we came to meet. Had a library of tens of thousands of tomes, apparently.

 

But the obits will doubtless concentrate on the television stunts.

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HAIKU

 

Oh Jeremy Jeremy Beadle

Why couldn't they take the paedo, incoherent racist DJ or going for gold eejit instead

Flowers in the mist

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Apparently, in keeping with modern tradition, there will be a minutes applause for him before all Saturdays football fixtures.

 

He'll be getting a big hand for perhaps the first time.

 

HA HA - you lot are hilarious - as outsiders, what do you all think of the human race?

Humanity is overrated.

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Well, if you are indeed God and made man in your image, you didn't really do the best job did you?

 

HA HA - you lot are hilarious - as outsiders, what do you all think of the human race?

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Guest Guestpopoff
HAIKU

 

Oh Jeremy Jeremy Beadle

Why couldn't they take the paedo, incoherent racist DJ or going for gold eejit instead

Flowers in the mist

which one is that then

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It's guess the tabloid headline time-

 

I'll go for 'Fate deals Beadle a bad hand'

 

 

"Game for an early bath"

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Guest Guest_God_*
Well, if you are indeed God and made man in your image, you didn't really do the best job did you?

 

HA HA - you lot are hilarious - as outsiders, what do you all think of the human race?

 

Unlike you and the majority of registered pillocks on this site, I do not believe I am my said screen name which I dare say you will have put many hours of thought into, what with having no life, girlfriend etc - hence the obsession with death. Go get some fresh air you pasty faced limp wristed geek ha ha!

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Well, if you are indeed God and made man in your image, you didn't really do the best job did you?

 

HA HA - you lot are hilarious - as outsiders, what do you all think of the human race?

 

Unlike you and the majority of registered pillocks on this site, I do not believe I am my said screen name which I dare say you will have put many hours of thought into, what with having no life, girlfriend etc - hence the obsession with death. Go get some fresh air you pasty faced limp wristed geek ha ha!

 

A devastating put-down that suggests the spirit of Beadle will never die.

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Guest Passer by
Well, if you are indeed God and made man in your image, you didn't really do the best job did you?

 

HA HA - you lot are hilarious - as outsiders, what do you all think of the human race?

 

Unlike you and the majority of registered pillocks on this site, I do not believe I am my said screen name which I dare say you will have put many hours of thought into, what with having no life, girlfriend etc - hence the obsession with death. Go get some fresh air you pasty faced limp wristed geek ha ha!

 

A devastating put-down that suggests the spirit of Beadle will never die.

 

Save your breath dude - you will need it to blow up your date - You are a precociously repulsive fiend and a repugnant, orgasm faking practitioner of bestiality - in my correct and humble opinion..... :sicktherm:

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Some excellent jokes on display here, and I'm sure Beadle would have enjoyed them.

 

Many would say he was, and I apologise for my language, "a C-word" but I'm not one of those. Although I never met him, I was impressed with his intelligence, sincerity and character which were apparent in a number of interviews. Here was a man whose personality was far removed from the public persona.

 

Thanks maryportfuncity for the insight into Beadle and yourself. Mystery animals - you say?

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Well, if you are indeed God and made man in your image, you didn't really do the best job did you?

 

HA HA - you lot are hilarious - as outsiders, what do you all think of the human race?

 

Unlike you and the majority of registered pillocks on this site, I do not believe I am my said screen name which I dare say you will have put many hours of thought into, what with having no life, girlfriend etc - hence the obsession with death. Go get some fresh air you pasty faced limp wristed geek ha ha!

 

A devastating put-down that suggests the spirit of Beadle will never die.

 

Save your breath dude - you will need it to blow up your date - You are a precociously repulsive fiend and a repugnant, orgasm faking practitioner of bestiality - in my correct and humble opinion..... :sicktherm:

 

It intrigues me that whenever random pond-life interject their thoughts on this site their derogatory remarks always gravitate towards a lack of love-action which must be afflicting their antagonists. It is always possible that they are quite wrong, and that their fixation with such interactivity merely reflects their own lack of success in this department.

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Well, if you are indeed God and made man in your image, you didn't really do the best job did you?

 

HA HA - you lot are hilarious - as outsiders, what do you all think of the human race?

 

Unlike you and the majority of registered pillocks on this site, I do not believe I am my said screen name which I dare say you will have put many hours of thought into, what with having no life, girlfriend etc - hence the obsession with death. Go get some fresh air you pasty faced limp wristed geek ha ha!

 

A devastating put-down that suggests the spirit of Beadle will never die.

 

Save your breath dude - you will need it to blow up your date - You are a precociously repulsive fiend and a repugnant, orgasm faking practitioner of bestiality - in my correct and humble opinion..... :sicktherm:

 

It intrigues me that whenever random pond-life interject their thoughts on this site their derogatory remarks always gravitate towards a lack of love-action which must be afflicting their antagonists. It is always possible that they are quite wrong, and that their fixation with such interactivity merely reflects their own lack of success in this department.

Spaeak fopr yourself, hjt... If I had 20p for every time i've come too quickly in ansheep... (sh*t, i''l regret this in the morniong)

 

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Well, if you are indeed God and made man in your image, you didn't really do the best job did you?

 

HA HA - you lot are hilarious - as outsiders, what do you all think of the human race?

 

Unlike you and the majority of registered pillocks on this site, I do not believe I am my said screen name which I dare say you will have put many hours of thought into, what with having no life, girlfriend etc - hence the obsession with death. Go get some fresh air you pasty faced limp wristed geek ha ha!

 

A devastating put-down that suggests the spirit of Beadle will never die.

 

Save your breath dude - you will need it to blow up your date - You are a precociously repulsive fiend and a repugnant, orgasm faking practitioner of bestiality - in my correct and humble opinion..... :sicktherm:

 

It intrigues me that whenever random pond-life interject their thoughts on this site their derogatory remarks always gravitate towards a lack of love-action which must be afflicting their antagonists. It is always possible that they are quite wrong, and that their fixation with such interactivity merely reflects their own lack of success in this department.

Spaeak fopr yourself, hjt... If I had 20p for every time i've come too quickly in ansheep... (sh*t, i''l regret this in the morniong)

 

.....and there was me thinking you were just a Goat shagger.

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I met Beadle in Kosovo, at the airport as he was about to fly back from entertaining the KFOR troops. He kindly posed for a photo with me and gave me his autograph. We chatted for a few minutes and he really seemed a nice guy. When I told him [entirely honestly] that I really enjoyed his shows, he was very self-deprecating and underlined that I "really needed to get a life".

I met his daughter more recently and was told by her friends "whatever you do, don't mention her father -- she's so sick and tired of people being nasty about him".

I thought he was a genuinely nice, and entertaining, chap. But most impressive, I thought, was how he just shrugged off the constant bile that was spewed about him [oops, that paints an odd picture]. Most people who are able to simply get on with things when so universally despised are either evil [Mugabe et al] or just thick [Jade from BB]. For somebody relatively clever and at the same time apparently personable to put up with such hatred is, I think, pretty impressive. As pointed out in some of his obits, he was voted the second-most hated man in Britain in 2001 [saddam Hussein came first].

But hey, I could be getting it wrong. The wife of a former Classics master of mine was friends with Beadle's ex-wife and I heard via that connection that he wasn't a very nice guy. Maybe.

Either way, I thought his shows were great. Doubtless that's testimony to my low-brow idiocy, as well.

Ramble over.

 

Edit: Just watching that idiot Henry Kelly talking about him on BBC Breakfast. Apparently, Beadle was indeed a "true bilblophile" [sic] and once bought two carloads of books [without looking at what they were] from a man in "Alexander Palace". If only Kelly had gone instead...

 

Another edit: Jeremy Beadle had a very large penis. But on the other hand, it was quite small.

[Apologies if this has already been shared (perhaps even by me; I'm rather tired)]

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Pneumonia is a nasty thing to die of. Maybe he just got cold and tried rubbing his hands together to keep warm. Always doomed to failure, that.

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.... Had a library of tens of thousands of tomes, apparently.

 

...

Edit: Just watching that idiot Henry Kelly talking about him on BBC Breakfast. Apparently, Beadle was indeed a "true bilblophile" [sic] and once bought two carloads of books [without looking at what they were] from a man in "Alexander Palace". If only Kelly had gone instead...

 

I believe it was the Victor Lewis-Smith who once cruelly commented that Beadle owning thousands of books, was like Stephen Hawking having a massive collection of Nike trainers.

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.... Had a library of tens of thousands of tomes, apparently.
...

Edit: Just watching that idiot Henry Kelly talking about him on BBC Breakfast. Apparently, Beadle was indeed a "true bilblophile" [sic] and once bought two carloads of books [without looking at what they were] from a man in "Alexander Palace". If only Kelly had gone instead...

 

I believe it was the Victor Lewis-Smith who once cruelly commented that Beadle owning thousands of books, was like Stephen Hawking having a massive collection of Nike trainers.

[satire]Stephen Hawking has a collection of Nike trainers? I doubt it; he's wheelchair-bound.[/satire] That'd be like James Nesbitt collecting "smug twat" disguises. Or victims of extraordinary rendition claiming Air Miles. etc.

 

Apparently, Jeremy Beadle stipulated in his will that his body be recycled into compost and spread on his garden. ITV bosses have confirmed that he'll be back in the autumn with a new show; "Beadle's A Sprout".

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Stephen Hawking has a collection of Nike trainers? I doubt it; he's wheelchair-bound.

 

I think there's just the slightest chance that both Mr Lewis-Smith and Dr Strangelove are aware of Dr Hawking's condition.

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I think SC has been worrying too many Sheep, he clearly is not as razor sharp as he used to be.

I do not, however, see any reason for Stephen Hawking not to have a collection of Nike trainers.

He can afford them and he has two feet. The fact that he no longer uses said feet is completely irrelevant.

Because he can no longer walk doesnt mean that he doesnt wear trousers, does it.

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I think SC has been worrying too many Sheep, he clearly is not as razor sharp as he used to be.

I do not, however, see any reason for Stephen Hawking not to have a collection of Nike trainers.

He can afford them and he has two feet. The fact that he no longer uses said feet is completely irrelevant.

Because he can no longer walk doesnt mean that he doesnt wear trousers, does it.

 

Well, Paris Hilton can walk but I can't remember seeing her wearing trousers

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The wife of a former Classics master of mine was friends with Beadle's ex-wife and I heard via that connection that he wasn't a very nice guy. Maybe.

I wouldn't take as gospel the opinion of someone's ex. Their view of the person in question may be somewhat skewed. What makes a man a terrible husband can also be what makes that same man a tremendous friend.

 

Either way, I thought his shows were great.

I always found it amazing how well recognized he was when he revealed himself (ooh err missus) at the end of the gag on Beadle's About. I'm quite familiar with the tricks of television production and the benevolence of careful editing, but I don't remember ever seeing an episode where he had to go so far as to say "Hello I'm Jeremy Beadle from...". Everybody knew who he was, which I'd suppose is a great testament to his notoriety. It also says a lot about human nature too I suppose further still, huge numbers of people tuning in to watch a fella they openly admit to disliking. The man himself sums it up here

 

“People feel guilty about enjoying the cruelty of comedy which is at someone else’s expense. They transfer their guilt on to me. But I say let them hate me . . . as long as they watch.”

Good on ya Jezza you annoying twat.

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