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Guest Paul Acworth

Reg Varney -On The Buses & Jack Smethurst Love Thy

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Sorry, random thought about crappy sitcoms again, I just had the unfortunate experience of Fresh Fields popping into my head.

 

Oh, and French Fields, the hilarious Gallic spin-off. Good Lord.

 

Duty Free. :(

 

Haggard. :P

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I hope I am not alone in thinking 'Bottom' to be the worst comedy ever. At least the likes of 'On the Buses' had no pretensions. Edmondson and Mayall should have known better.

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Granted Bottom is puerile, sick, self-consciously pathetic and - seemingly - allergic to anything like a real plot, but that's kind of the point. I struggle with half an hour, but five or ten minutes is a laugh. You've lost nowt much turning it off well before the end.

 

Incidentally, if you hate Bottom don't even touch their 'Guest House Paradiso' movie. The outbreak of food poisoning in the guest house and the tidal wave of vomit that comes about are worse than anything they did on TV.

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Granted Bottom is puerile, sick, self-consciously pathetic and - seemingly - allergic to anything like a real plot, but that's kind of the point. I struggle with half an hour, but five or ten minutes is a laugh. You've lost nowt much turning it off well before the end.

 

Incidentally, if you hate Bottom don't even touch their 'Guest House Paradiso' movie. The outbreak of food poisoning in the guest house and the tidal wave of vomit that comes about are worse than anything they did on TV.

 

I found it hilarious. I can not see a Brussels sprout to this day without thinking, 'sprout mexicane.'

 

Incidentally, Bottom was shown during the early evening children's slot on Swedish T.V. in the mid 1990's.

(The television show, not the body part. You have to wait until 7 o'clock for that)

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Granted Bottom is puerile, sick, self-consciously pathetic and - seemingly - allergic to anything like a real plot, but that's kind of the point. I struggle with half an hour, but five or ten minutes is a laugh. You've lost nowt much turning it off well before the end.

 

Incidentally, if you hate Bottom don't even touch their 'Guest House Paradiso' movie. The outbreak of food poisoning in the guest house and the tidal wave of vomit that comes about are worse than anything they did on TV.

 

I found it hilarious. I can not see a Brussels sprout to this day without thinking, 'sprout mexicane.'

 

Incidentally, Bottom was shown during the early evening children's slot on Swedish T.V. in the mid 1990's.

(The television show, not the body part. You have to wait until 7 o'clock for that)

I found it mildy amusing in a puerile way, but it was really just an overlong rehash of their Dangerous Brothers routine.

 

Blandness is far more offensive to me.

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Blandness is far more offensive to me

 

Blandness is a disease.

 

DL the antidote, or summat.

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Someone at work overheard a radio discussion mentioning Reg this week. I didn't believe what they told me but a little Wiki time reveals - shock - our Reg was the first member of the public in the UK to use a cashpoint machine. They'll put that in his obit, eh Alphonsin?

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Someone at work overheard a radio discussion mentioning Reg this week. I didn't believe what they told me but a little Wiki time reveals - shock - our Reg was the first member of the public in the UK to use a cashpoint machine. They'll put that in his obit, eh Alphonsin?

 

 

Was that to honour his services to UK sitcoms concerning bus drivers?

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Jeffrey Holland???? Oh, the shame of it :skull:

Around 1990/91 I was working for a London Hotel, Jeffery Holland stayed and on checking out tried to avoid paying for his mini bar bill. When I insisted he pay for his thirsty habit he pulled out the 'Don't you know who I am?' routine.

 

The drunk that can't afford to pay for his mini bar bill was my reply. I was sacked for being rude to a guest, but it was worth it. I'll take that sort of thing from the likes of Madonna but Jeffery F*****g Holland :huh:

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Someone at work overheard a radio discussion mentioning Reg this week. I didn't believe what they told me but a little Wiki time reveals - shock - our Reg was the first member of the public in the UK to use a cashpoint machine. They'll put that in his obit, eh Alphonsin?

 

 

Was that to honour his services to UK sitcoms concerning bus drivers?

 

You've got me, I just Wiki'd it when someone at work told me he'd heard this fact on radio. I'd guess it says more about trying to encourage the unadventurous and basically fairly dull fans of his shows to trust the new cutting edge technology as it was introduced. I mean, young 'uns desperate for cash to sustain a night out and the viewers of shows like Tomorrow's World would've just gone to up a cashpoint and done the business. 'On The Buses' viewers would probably have stood there until it spoke to them.

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Forgive me for being slow here, but seeing as Reg was born in 1916, it means that when he was chasing dolly birds around in Holiday on the Buses, he was a sprightly 56 at best. Is anyone else disturbed by this, or by the fact that the original On the Buses film was the highest grossing British movie of 1971?

 

bestpair.gif

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This story appeared today. As I understand it the Barmy Army Film Club has an agreement that it can write and produce 'new' Dad's Army episodes. Do any of our regular posters live in the area because the paper ran a pictrue of the cast with some of the originals; Bill Pertwee, Private Sponge and a couple of others. Be interesting to see who's standing and who's sitting.

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Dear old Reg got a mention on "Have I Got News For You" (and in the following link from the "Sun") this week. 2007 is apparently the 40th anniversary of the first hole-in-the-wall cash machine in Great Britain.

 

"Comedy actor Reg Varney, star of TV sitcom On The Buses, became the first person in the country to use a hole-in-the-wall machine on June 27, 1967, in Enfield, North London. He withdrew £10 in ten £1 notes."

 

Ah, £1 notes! Nostalgia time!

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Ah, £1 notes! Nostalgia time!

 

FYI VSBfH The Royal bank of Scotland still issue £1 notes ;)

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Ah, £1 notes! Nostalgia time!

 

FYI VSBfH The Royal bank of Scotland still issue £1 notes ;)

 

 

We still have them over here too, bloody nuisance they are. You look in your purse and see all these notes and think you're rich and then you realise you've only got four quid.

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Ah, £1 notes! Nostalgia time!

 

FYI VSBfH The Royal bank of Scotland still issue £1 notes ;)

 

Do cash machines in Scotland (or the IOM for that matter) allow you to draw a total of £1? I guess not, though it might help to perpetuate a certain myth about Scots people...

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Ah, £1 notes! Nostalgia time!

 

FYI VSBfH The Royal bank of Scotland still issue £1 notes ;)

 

Do cash machines in Scotland (or the IOM for that matter) allow you to draw a total of £1? I guess not, though it might help to perpetuate a certain myth about Scots people...

 

No, the minimum withdrawal is a tenner

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You don't see too many one pound notes these days though. There were certainly more going around even 5-10 years ago.

I have one in my wallet but have had it for quite a few years now. I was given it and told to keep hold of it - so I did. I also have an older Scots one pound note (1983). About 2 years ago someone tried to buy a yearbook with it. I thought it was odd and so replaced it with a pound coin and kept the note.

So I have two one pound notes stashed in the back of my wallet.

I also have a Scots 100 pound note. Sadly I was told to keep hold of that too. Before you try and mug me, I don't keep that in the back of my wallet.

 

Scottish people are rather queer with their notes. I also kept back a Queen Mother Scottish 20 pound note and a Golden Jubilee 5 pound note. Some people have Jack Nicklaus (the golfer (can't spell his name)) fivers - they go crazy for them.

 

Still, I'm the only person I know who has a British 25 pound coin (legal tender).

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Still, I'm the only person I know who has a British 25 pound coin (legal tender).

 

A 25 pound coin? Holy f**k. I bet you found that one in the wishing well.

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You don't see too many one pound notes these days though. There were certainly more going around even 5-10 years ago.

I have one in my wallet but have had it for quite a few years now. I was given it and told to keep hold of it - so I did. I also have an older Scots one pound note (1983). About 2 years ago someone tried to buy a yearbook with it. I thought it was odd and so replaced it with a pound coin and kept the note.

So I have two one pound notes stashed in the back of my wallet.

I also have a Scots 100 pound note. Sadly I was told to keep hold of that too. Before you try and mug me, I don't keep that in the back of my wallet.

 

Scottish people are rather queer with their notes. I also kept back a Queen Mother Scottish 20 pound note and a Golden Jubilee 5 pound note. Some people have Jack Nicklaus (the golfer (can't spell his name)) fivers - they go crazy for them.

 

Still, I'm the only person I know who has a British 25 pound coin (legal tender).

 

A Scotsman unable to part with his money. Now where have I heard that before? :) Just joshing.

 

I have some Scottish friends who, when they find themselves in England taking an instant disliking to any shopkeeper/barman that they meet, they will "give 'em the pound". It is fun to watch the reaction when they reply "what's this?" swiftly followed by a deadpan reply "pound note". I suppose, as the saying goes, you have to be there.

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Forty years on, The Sun runs that historic picture at the cashpoint again, about halfway down the linked page.

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Forty years on, The Sun runs that historic picture at the cashpoint again, about halfway down the linked page.

 

I've always wondered what he spent that crisp, virgin note on. My money's on some nice leather elbow patches for that fetching cardigan he was wearing. Or amphetamines.

 

Cheers,

 

BHB

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He's still alive BHB, hunt him down and ask him!

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I always though on the Buses was pathetic as the idea that two geriatric old scrotums like Reg & Jack could get off with young busty "Clippies" somewhat beyond belief. :lol:

 

 

C,mon Himler, you must have s@@t in your eyes! Dont be fooled into thinking that every female back in the seventies in the UK was,nt dying for the chance to jump on Jack and Stan and shag their brains out then take turns doing their washing, ironing and cooking and sit adoringly at their feet whilst they call us silly moos. With the current re-runs being shown on TV I am sure a whole new generation of women are ditching girl power and having the urge to lie down and become doormats to bus drivers!

 

Get your leg over, lads! :rip:

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I always though on the Buses was pathetic as the idea that two geriatric old scrotums like Reg & Jack could get off with young busty "Clippies" somewhat beyond belief. :lol:

 

 

C,mon Himler, you must have s@@t in your eyes! Dont be fooled into thinking that every female back in the seventies in the UK was,nt dying for the chance to jump on Jack and Stan and shag their brains out then take turns doing their washing, ironing and cooking and sit adoringly at their feet whilst they call us silly moos. With the current re-runs being shown on TV I am sure a whole new generation of women are ditching girl power and having the urge to lie down and become doormats to bus drivers!

 

Get your leg over, lads! :rip:

 

..........I really must go and get my PSV licence..................... :)

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