Phantom 2,535 Posted December 20, 2017 The other day in psychology class, we were all laughing at how stupid Pavlov's dogs were. Then the bell rang and we all went to lunch. 5 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bladan 293 Posted December 22, 2017 What did Tarzan say when he heard that a herd of elephants is coming over the mountains??? "Listen, a herd of elephants is coming over the mountains" 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RIP Wee Jum 1,559 Posted December 22, 2017 A vegan said to me: “People who sell meat are gross.” I replied: “But people who sell fruit and vegetables are grocer.” 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bladan 293 Posted December 22, 2017 Donald Trump made a state visit to Uganda and got a monkey as a part of the gift exchange. Back in the White House, he had no idea what to do with the monkey. He decided to eat humble pie and called Hillary. She told Trump to take the monkey to the zoo. Next week Trump again called Hillary. "Thank you for a great tip. We had a lot of fun in the zoo! Today we're going to the Museum of Modern Art!"" Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
deadsox 894 Posted December 22, 2017 9 hours ago, bladan said: What did Tarzan say when he heard that a herd of elephants is coming over the mountains??? "Listen, a herd of elephants is coming over the mountains" Very deep Blady old boy! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RIP Wee Jum 1,559 Posted December 25, 2017 12-year-old son of 2 Unlimited star Ray Slijngaard complains the other kids at school keeping singing ‘No Limits’ at him but Ray tells him to techno notice Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,657 Posted December 30, 2017 On 23/07/2005 at 23:45, maryportfuncity said: A couple of Halibut women from Leeds are looking through an old photograph album. 'Oh look,' says one, 'there's my son on his first day at school, and here he is in the school play, and here with his football team...' 'Ah the children,' says her friend, 'They blow up so fast these days.' C'mon guys, share a few rib ticklers with us. WTF happened to the opening joke on this thread? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Perfect Passing 277 Posted January 2, 2018 The teacher was telling the kids about the birds and the bees and she explained that when a man and a woman meet and fall in love, nine months later the stork usually brings them a little baby from its nest.Little Johnny at the back of the class put his hand up and asks the teacher, "Are you sure about the stork, miss? I think you’re getting your birds mixed up cos my big sister just got a little baby.... and she said it was from a "shag" in Scarborough. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bladan 293 Posted January 3, 2018 What did Trump say to Kim Jong-un? – My nuke button is bigger than yours. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cat O'Falk 3,290 Posted January 7, 2018 On 30/12/2017 at 22:02, maryportfuncity said: WTF happened to the opening joke on this thread? The filter changes the word 'mµslim' to 'halibut'. 1 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Fellatio Nelson 6,219 Posted January 7, 2018 2 hours ago, Cat O'Falk said: The filter changes the word 'mµslim' to 'halibut'. Thats nothing. The Police found that, on the 'Britain First' website, the filter was set up to change the word Muslim to Terrorist. 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RIP Wee Jum 1,559 Posted January 8, 2018 Last night my friend David lost his ID. Now I call him Dav. 1 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RIP Wee Jum 1,559 Posted January 12, 2018 I was walking down the street and somebody threw cheese at me Very mature Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RIP Wee Jum 1,559 Posted January 26, 2018 Call me Jummie Burns 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RIP Wee Jum 1,559 Posted January 28, 2018 Just seen a French footballer playing on a nintendo... It was Thierry on Wii 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
One shot Paddy 1,206 Posted January 28, 2018 2 hours ago, Wee Jum said: Should it not be cats? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Phantom 2,535 Posted January 29, 2018 The nurse at the sperm bank asked me if I wanted to masturbate in the cup. I told her that I know I am good at it, but I don't think I am ready to compete just yet. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Phantom 2,535 Posted February 3, 2018 I just thought of a really good owl joke. But I can't use it until 2/8/20 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
