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1 hour ago, Bibliogryphon said:

I am not a massive technology addict but I have had a number of work phones and personal devices. I have dropped them in water and left them in taxis but I always wondered about how people managed to crack their screens so easily. I had never cracked a screen......

 

Until the first day of my furlough when I cracked my personal phone screen in the most embarrassing way possible.....

 

We're waiting...

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2 hours ago, Bibliogryphon said:

I am not a massive technology addict but I have had a number of work phones and personal devices. I have dropped them in water and left them in taxis but I always wondered about how people managed to crack their screens so easily. I had never cracked a screen......

 

Until the first day of my furlough when I cracked my personal phone screen in the most embarrassing way possible.....

 

 

QdUmIAgMTwyDGpzRIGWl.png

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17 hours ago, time said:

We're waiting...

Well it is as you can imagine Mrs Biblio used to having the upstairs of the house to herself even when I am working from home was headed for her bath as God intended. I encountered her on the landing and accosted her. However in an effort to catch up with her in the lack of clothes I was rather hasty in using my foot to remove my trousers and I heard a sharp crack from the phone in my trouser pocket.

 

Fortunately it is only a cheap phone & the damage is not too bad. 

But considering that neither of us are in the flush of youth it is a pretty embarrassing way to wreck your phone.

Just glad it was not my work phone.

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2 minutes ago, Bibliogryphon said:

Well it is as you can imagine Mrs Biblio used to having the upstairs of the house to herself even when I am working from home was headed for her bath as God intended. I encountered her on the landing and accosted her. However in an effort to catch up with her in the lack of clothes I was rather hasty in using my foot to remove my trousers and I heard a sharp crack from the phone in my trouser pocket.

  

 Fortunately it is only a cheap phone & the damage is not too bad. 

But considering that neither of us are in the flush of youth it is a pretty embarrassing way to wreck your phone.

Just glad it was not my work phone.


I hope your boss was understanding about your being a few seconds late for your Zoom meeting on this occasion. 

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27 minutes ago, Bibliogryphon said:

Well it is as you can imagine Mrs Biblio used to having the upstairs of the house to herself even when I am working from home was headed for her bath as God intended. I encountered her on the landing and accosted her. However in an effort to catch up with her in the lack of clothes I was rather hasty in using my foot to remove my trousers and I heard a sharp crack from the phone in my trouser pocket.

 

Fortunately it is only a cheap phone & the damage is not too bad. 

But considering that neither of us are in the flush of youth it is a pretty embarrassing way to wreck your phone.

Just glad it was not my work phone.

It's certainly more embarrassing than when I cracked my first screen - and that was in a Gents toilet!

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2 hours ago, time said:

It's certainly more embarrassing than when I cracked my first screen - and that was in a Gents toilet!

 

My biggest pre-technology embarrassment was being phoned at the office by the assistant purser of a cross-Channel ferry. 

"A cheque book in your name has just been handed in by a lorry driver who found it in the Gents toilets on B Deck."

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People who use the word 'doggo' when referring to canine animals. They're dogs for fuck's sake, and you're an adult. Grow up.

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19 hours ago, time said:

People who use the word 'doggo' when referring to canine animals. They're dogs for fuck's sake, and you're an adult. Grow up.

Borking Heck!

 

This Stoopid Hooman does me a bamboozle. He needs a boop on his snoot.

 

Not a good boi.

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thefarside.jpg.caf5dae1304a0505526c8a58e17ffd20.jpg

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On 29/06/2020 at 13:36, time said:

People who use the word 'doggo' when referring to canine animals. They're dogs for fuck's sake, and you're an adult. Grow up.

I’m afraid I feel the same about ‘cunto’.  Why bother wasting all that breath on an extra syllable? You could fit in an extra fuck, twat or shite with that. 

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Thieving fucking pikey cunts.

 

The workshop my old man has been renting space in was broken into last night.  We lost about 1200 quid’s worth of kit, perhaps not a huge amount however it will significantly impact the small amount of work he had coming in for the last few weeks.  They left some bigger more expensive stuff that they are bound to come back for.  Stuff that he has saved hard to buy and build up to make a business. 
 

How fucking dare somebody smash their way into someone else’s property, and steal? Who the fuck do they think they are? We’ve not only lost equipment, we’ve lost time, work and money.  Thieves are pure fucking scum.  I feel physically sick, livid, upset.  My heart is aching for my old man, who at times is the biggest prick I know but he is a bloody hard worker and is the best at his game - yes I would say that but 30 years in a trade where everyone says ‘if you want that doing properly I know just the man’ - he is 20 stone of fucking hard bastard but he is fucking gutted, after getting no fucking help these last few months now this, I’ve never heard him sound so low.  I’m venting on here because it’s fairly anonymous, and we can plot and exact our revenge without the Facebook grapevine alerting the dirty cunts to their imminent fate.
 

I am not very happy.

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Menopause.  Yeh I love having a face as hot as the surface of fucking Venus 24 hours a bastard day, and a headache that starts by the clock at 230 every cunting afternoon. 

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On 10/07/2020 at 18:42, Lard Bazaar said:

Thieving fucking pikey cunts.

 

The workshop my old man has been renting space in was broken into last night.  We lost about 1200 quid’s worth of kit, perhaps not a huge amount however it will significantly impact the small amount of work he had coming in for the last few weeks.  They left some bigger more expensive stuff that they are bound to come back for.  Stuff that he has saved hard to buy and build up to make a business. 
 

How fucking dare somebody smash their way into someone else’s property, and steal? Who the fuck do they think they are? We’ve not only lost equipment, we’ve lost time, work and money.  Thieves are pure fucking scum.  I feel physically sick, livid, upset.  My heart is aching for my old man, who at times is the biggest prick I know but he is a bloody hard worker and is the best at his game - yes I would say that but 30 years in a trade where everyone says ‘if you want that doing properly I know just the man’ - he is 20 stone of fucking hard bastard but he is fucking gutted, after getting no fucking help these last few months now this, I’ve never heard him sound so low.  I’m venting on here because it’s fairly anonymous, and we can plot and exact our revenge without the Facebook grapevine alerting the dirty cunts to their imminent fate.
  

 I am not very happy.

 

Being robbed is never nice. And those who do it are fucking scum, sadly I don't expect the boys in blue will try all that hard to actually help you. They might pretend to care a bit a bit more because it's a business that's been robbed but the reality is the reason this happens is the fuckers know they'll get away with it and if they don't the punishment will be nothing. Sympathy goes out to your old man, hope he can fix it. 

 

 

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Tiger bread. wtaf.

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3 hours ago, time said:

Tiger bread. wtaf.

Don't mind it personally and the young wombles are quite keen in it,

And at least (thankfully) no Tigers go into the making of it (see also Toad in the hole, Lion Bars, Penguin biscuits, etc).

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18 hours ago, Miracle Aligner said:

 

Being robbed is never nice. And those who do it are fucking scum, sadly I don't expect the boys in blue will try all that hard to actually help you. They might pretend to care a bit a bit more because it's a business that's been robbed but the reality is the reason this happens is the fuckers know they'll get away with it and if they don't the punishment will be nothing. Sympathy goes out to your old man, hope he can fix it. 

 

 

Thanks.  We didn’t bother to ring the police, its happened there before and they never do anything, and there was no cameras so nothing for them to go on anyway.  Also if we’d rung the police it would give the game away when the little cunts’ severed dicks are found in Tesco bags in the Thames. 

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3 minutes ago, Lard Bazaar said:

 Also if we’d rung the police it would give the game away when the little cunts’ severed dicks are found in Tesco bags in the Thames. 

 

Good point. 

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51 minutes ago, Lard Bazaar said:

Thanks.  We didn’t bother to ring the police, its happened there before and they never do anything, and there was no cameras so nothing for them to go on anyway.  Also if we’d rung the police it would give the game away when the little cunts’ severed dicks are found in Tesco bags in the Thames. 

 

I hate to say but you really should inform the police even if you don't expect them to do anything. Remember reading an interview with a cop years ago that pointed out the lack of reporting means they don't allocate extra patrols in areas and leads to loads more getting done in the same area - you'd get 10 robberies but crime stats would only show 1 so police do nothing. Use crimestoppers anon and give the general area if you don't want a formal investigation. It might save a neighbour from similar fate. 

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7 hours ago, time said:

Tiger bread. wtaf.

 

Tiger baguette, red leicester, red onion.

 

gimb.gif.b611dba65c14ca0288ee3bc9afe1aabf.gif

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47 minutes ago, The Quim Reaper said:

 

Tiger baguette, red leicester, red onion.

 

gimb.gif.b611dba65c14ca0288ee3bc9afe1aabf.gif

Ditch the onion and replace with crisps.

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1 hour ago, Lard Bazaar said:

Ditch the onion and replace with crisps.

Ditch the tiger bread and replace with proper bread.

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8 hours ago, time said:

Ditch the tiger bread and replace with proper bread.

 

Yeah, I tried it once out of curiosity and it tasted funny.   It was edible, but I don't understand why it caught on - just the gimmick, I suppose.

There's something called giraffe bread too.  Bandwagon.

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45 minutes ago, Toast said:

 

Yeah, I tried it once out of curiosity and it tasted funny.   It was edible, but I don't understand why it caught on - just the gimmick, I suppose.

There's something called giraffe bread too.  Bandwagon.

I seem to remember a kid wrote to one of the supermarkets (Asda?) asking why it was called tiger bread when the pattern was more like a giraffe. I could be wring.

 

I think the reason it caught on was because of the slightly 'off' taste. Supermarket ISB bread became so tasteless they probably had to do something. Slapping a bit of a topping on it was simpler (i.e. cheaper) than teaching everyone how to cook it properly.

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