The Canadian Paul Deadpool

[Madame Defarge 21]

There certainly are many croakworthy Canadians if you look for them. I'm putting together a Canadian Choir Invisible , or at least a team with many Canadian candidates. I've found a Ukrainian-Canadian

whom I'm hoping may be worth an extra point or two.

 

Hmmm... well I'm a Ukranian-Canadian, and three of my friends know who I am. If you came over and killed me, and it made the news, then by the rules I guess I'd have to give you points...

 

Uh-oh...

 

No, I would never do that. It's against the rules! It is , isn't it?

My candidate is His Eminence Metropolitan John Stinka of Winnipeg. According to Wiki,

his Eminence has been enthroned at the Holy Trinity Ukrainian Orthodox Metropolitan Cathedral.

[football_fan 42]

I'll let someone else post this in near misses when an English version comes out, but this link confirms the following: Oriana Fallaci dead.

 

Two teams will need to choose a replacement including, for the second time, Football Fan.

Bugger.

[Tempus Fugit 214]

I'll let someone else post this in near misses when an English version comes out, but this link confirms the following: Oriana Fallaci dead.

 

Two teams will need to choose a replacement including, for the second time, Football Fan.

Bugger.

Bugger, from me also.

[Phantom 2,535]

I'll let someone else post this in near misses when an English version comes out, but this link confirms the following: Oriana Fallaci dead.

 

Two teams will need to choose a replacement including, for the second time, Football Fan.

Bugger.

Bugger, from me also.

 

I know exactly how you feel 8 of the ones I've had pencilled in for next year have died so far, but luckily I have a couple of months to find replacements rather than a couple of days.

[maryportfuncity 10,657]

Purely in the interests of helping those stuck for names, you understand. You'd land additional female and porno points if Chesty Morgan - b 1928 - were to die. I'll be honest and say it never occured to me to pick her and my team's already entered, but I did find a link to this surreal fight sequence posted on a football web site. I thought I'd share it. If you've a problem with porn, avoid it. TBH I'm not sure when I watch it if I'm laughing at the film, or with it.

 

I should also stress that after - oh - a full three minutes on line looking for Chesty information, I have no idea whether she's alive or dead.

[Canadian Paul 97]

Purely in the interests of helping those stuck for names, you understand. You'd land additional female and porno points if Chesty Morgan - b 1928 - were to die. I'll be honest and say it never occured to me to pick her and my team's already entered, but I did find a link to this surreal fight sequence posted on a football web site. I thought I'd share it. If you've a problem with porn, avoid it. TBH I'm not sure when I watch it if I'm laughing at the film, or with it.

 

I should also stress that after - oh - a full three minutes on line looking for Chesty information, I have no idea whether she's alive or dead.

 

She's on my "Rappers and Hoes" Theme Team. Very much still alive.

[maryportfuncity 10,657]

Cheers CP, I have fond mammaries (heh heh) of the lady. Before it was scuppered in an insurance jobbie fire a local cinema used to have a great habit of admitting anyone to any film so long as they paid full price. They'd also break a packet of cigarettes allowing thirteen year olds to buy one or two. Aged 14 I found myself, in the said cinema when they showed Chesty's classic Deadly Weapons, the opening shot of which is a full on frontal of her topless and shot from the neck down. A full grown guy behind me screamed out loud in sheer terror at the sight, a moment I still recall fondly.

 

So - like - where does she live these days, back in Poland perchance?

[Six 23]

Purely in the interests of helping those stuck for names, you understand... Chesty Morgan - b 1928 ... [snip] ... I did find a link to this surreal fight sequence ... TBH I'm not sure when I watch it if I'm laughing at the film, or with it.

 

Wow! What a resourceful woman! I'd never have thought of using my breasts for hidden camera/ self defence weapon purposes before. Alas, mine are normal size and so wouldn't quite work. But, if ever I have a boob-job that goes horribly wrong resulting in my newly huge breasts hanging down around my waist, I'll model myself on Chesty.

[Brinsworth House Baiter 12]

Jeez, Mary...

 

Your disclaimer regarding having problems with porn was inaccurate.

 

I have no problem with porn, but I do have a problem with saggy tits flopping around like freshly landed mackerel.

 

Jeez...she resembles what I imagine Ulrika Jonsson would look like if she put on a bit of weight and a dodgy wig.

 

Horrible...nipples should look to the sky or at least you...not the floor!

 

Man, I'm traumatised by that video clip. It could well turn me gay.

[maryportfuncity 10,657]

Now there's an idea BHB, I wonder if that poor sap who screamed out loud in the cinema behind me was similarly turned and may - to this day - stalk internet chat rooms seeking out male companions who; 'must have flat and firm chest.'

[Brinsworth House Baiter 12]

Now there's an idea BHB, I wonder if that poor sap who screamed out loud in the cinema behind me was similarly turned and may - to this day - stalk internet chat rooms seeking out male companions who; 'must have flat and firm chest.'

 

I have to say that I'm not having a lot of success in my new career as a gay, Mary. I thought it would provide a perfect opportunity to pay off the milk bill, 'in kind', but the milkman wasn't interested. Perhaps my answering the door in a leather, studded thong and nipple clamps sent out mixed signals and smacked of desperation?

 

I'm off to Amazon to get some Erasure CDs.

 

And a cravat. I think I need a cravat.

 

My crow kingdom for a cravat!

[TLC 9]

Now there's an idea BHB, I wonder if that poor sap who screamed out loud in the cinema behind me was similarly turned and may - to this day - stalk internet chat rooms seeking out male companions who; 'must have flat and firm chest.'

 

I have to say that I'm not having a lot of success in my new career as a gay, Mary. I thought it would provide a perfect opportunity to pay off the milk bill, 'in kind', but the milkman wasn't interested. Perhaps my answering the door in a leather, studded thong and nipple clamps sent out mixed signals and smacked of desperation?

 

I'm off to Amazon to get some Erasure CDs.

 

And a cravat. I think I need a cravat.

 

My crow kingdom for a cravat!

I can't imagine any signals that outfit sent out were mixed!

 

Of course, if you were in a hurry getting dolled up and put the studded thong on inside out, your facial expression may have been enough to put the milkman off from making one extra full cream delivery....

 

I think you need a dressing gown more than a cravat, although the two go rather well together. The dressing gown gives you more of a chance to successfully invite people in before bolting the door and disrobing, in my experience.

 

The cravat should be silk by the way, anything else would lack class! If I still had the one my nan got me for xmas when I was 8 years old (or the matching one my brother got the same xmas!) I'd send it to you, but I think the police forensic department will hold on to it for some time yet, just in case any advance on current DNA identification procedures is discovered in the future. The spoilsports.

[maryportfuncity 10,657]

BHB, if it's any consolation we like you the way you've always been so it might be an idea to - like - deal with the immediate trauma of accidental exposure to Chesty Morgan and then go back to being yourself. Like her, I guess you're in desperate need of support!

[Brinsworth House Baiter 12]

Dammit, you're right, Mary!

 

I shall seek therapy and forget about becoming a gay this instant. Besides, I had kinda forgotten I was married and not a Member of Parliament, so my heterosexuality was thus like a favourite coat which one is loathe to take off.

 

Although, I feel it only proper and decent to inform you that since it was your good self who exposed me to this big, saggy-titted trauma, I have instructed my solicitors to take action.

 

Unfortunately, once they had watched the clip they too became tragically traumatised and are currently wandering aorund their chambers, dribbling like simple children.

 

Mary, it is a curse you have unleashed on the world- a bit like that video in The Ring.

 

I'm still getting a cravat though, a silk one like TLC so kindly recommended.

[Phantom 2,535]

I had Robert Earl Jones on my original list that I had submitted. good job I had a back-up pick chosen.

I've got in the habit of doing that recently as soon as I contemplate putting someone on my list, they go ahead and die.

[Handrejka 1,904]

Jeez, Mary...

 

Your disclaimer regarding having problems with porn was inaccurate.

 

I have no problem with porn, but I do have a problem with saggy tits flopping around like freshly landed mackerel.

 

Jeez...she resembles what I imagine Ulrika Jonsson would look like if she put on a bit of weight and a dodgy wig.

 

Horrible...nipples should look to the sky or at least you...not the floor!

 

Man, I'm traumatised by that video clip. It could well turn me gay.

 

I'm sure a gay man would be far more offended (as was I) by the teaming of a pink,floaty,flowery blouse with a green plaid skirt. Criminal

[maryportfuncity 10,657]

Handy, out little Manx minx; I get yer point but it was - like - 1973 or summat, tasteless combinations were in. I'll bet the blessed Karen Carpenter was spotted similarly attired.

[Handrejka 1,904]

Handy, out little Manx minx; I get yer point but it was - like - 1973 or summat, tasteless combinations were in. I'll bet the blessed Karen Carpenter was spotted similarly attired.

 

 

More than likely. That's about the only thing they could ever have in common. I bet this is the first and last time Karen Carpenter and Chesty Morgan will ever be mentioned in the same sentence.

[Canadian Paul 97]

Just a friendly reminder - if anyone wants to get a Team in for the CPDP and hasn't yet, there's only nine hours left. After that, it's game on!

[maryportfuncity 10,657]

Wonder if there'll be frantic last minute e-mails subbing an existing team member for a certain pint sized television presenter currently snoozing in Leeds.

 

I'm looking forward to waking up and matching my top ten against the competition.

[TLC 9]

Just a friendly reminder - if anyone wants to get a Team in for the CPDP and hasn't yet, there's only nine hours left. After that, it's game on!

Sorry CP, after ruminating over it I've finally realised I really haven't got the imagination to pick a team for the CPDP that isn't just the first 19 random names I pick from the ideas & possibilities list, with Bryan Adams thrown in as the Canadian just because I'd be gutted if he celebrated his 'summer of 6 feet under' and I missed it.

 

I'm just not ready for that sort of level of commitment...

[pulphack 6]

Sorry to go back to Chesty Morgan again, but - crimes against fashion aside (and even for '73 her fashion sense is challenged) - the oddest thing about her movies is that they were written and directed by Doris Wishman. So the bizarre idea of a camera implanted in one boob that will EXPLODE in 72 hours if the mission isn't accomplished and the equipment removed actually came from a nice housewife from (I think) New Jersey. Who also made a movie about a penis transplant just before the wonderful 'Percy'. And apparently Chesty was so crap that she had to be dubbed. And never mind the flowery blouse and plaid skirt - what about those clumping red platforms she seems to love so much? And those wonderful support hose. Honestly, that was supposed to be erotic?

 

BTW, can't include Doris in anything as she died a year or two back. Certainly not forgotten, though...

[Canadian Paul 97]

The CPDP is now up! Just in case you lost the link, it's at this location.

 

A couple things to note. Firstly, the Hall of Candidates won't be up for a while, so don't ask. I'm also surprised that no one other than me picked Mirza Hussain, whose case has been all over the BBC and who is scheduled to be executed on October 1. Famous for being Famous, but points in the bag.

 

Also, no one else picked June Havoc, my now unique-pick, 90 year old female Canadian. Sister of Gypsy Rose Lee, but also a notable actor in her own right.

 

Anyhoo, I'm exhausted, but the bored among you can peruse the Teams and see who everyone selected and what their Theme Teams are. Any questions and concerns will be addressed tomorrow.

[Six 23]

How exciting! I'm listening for the sound of many popping clogs even as I write! I am pretty sure that all 20 of my CPDP picks will die in evenly spaced intervals over the next year. I shall write to them all and ask very nicely for their cooperation.

 

By the way, CP, good luck in completing that Hall of Candidates! That looks like a hell of a lot of work! If I can help in any way, just let me know. I don't know how much help I'll actually be, because I'm pretty useless at everything really. Worth a try though!

[maryportfuncity 10,657]

Great stuff, some interesting picks suggesting mucho midnight oil turned to smoke. Am I right in assuming a certain One Shot Paddy is behind the Tankslappers?

 

Also, does Thatcher count as a Science and Religion member on the basis of her chemistry degree? Dodgy I'd say, I mean, I've read several lengthy books with no pictures but it doesn't make me - like - a professor.