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Lord Fellatio Nelson

DL Status Updates: Statements, Obsevations & Verbal Tennis

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^ Aye, what he said.

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Gary Lineker.

You are a jug eared cunt.

That is all.

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15 minutes ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said:

Gary Lineker.

You are a jug eared cunt.

That is all.

If I’m perfectly honest, I probably would.

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2 minutes ago, Youwanticewiththat said:

I take it only for the crisps tho?

Obvs :D

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9 hours ago, Youwanticewiththat said:

You really are my Woman of Courage 2017 Lardy :)

It’s a tough job but one I’m happy to take on :D

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I do not think even the combined sick puppy minds of Lardy, Charon and myself could have created this story and presented it as fact!:lol:

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2017/dec/20/amazon-removes-circumcision-training-kits-from-sale

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4 hours ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said:

I do not think even the combined sick puppy minds of Lardy, Charon and myself could have created this story and presented it as fact!:lol:

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2017/dec/20/amazon-removes-circumcision-training-kits-from-sale

:o Holy fuck, what is WRONG with people?

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5 hours ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said:

I do not think even the combined sick puppy minds of Lardy, Charon and myself could have created this story and presented it as fact!:lol:

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2017/dec/20/amazon-removes-circumcision-training-kits-from-sale

Jesus Christ. You can still get them on amazon.com, but I ain't linking.

 

Some of the comments are priceless, though.

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Finished with my final exams today and finally on winter break. 

 

My school adopted a new schedule this year, shifting winter break by about a week. So in exchange for starting break rather late (just a few days before Christmas), we don't have to go back until January 8th this year. So I finally get to enjoy my New Year's instead of dreading it as one of the last days of break.

 

I now have a couple days left for relaxation and deadpool research, then Christmas Eve and Christmas celebrations with the family, and after that a ski vacation. Should be a fun couple of weeks. 

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Ok, so you can say 'fuck' 'cunt' 'wanker' etc etc.

You can also post up shite like 'share if you agree that muslims should go to church instead of Mosques if the live in the UK..'

You can also post up stuff that could constitute paedophilia to the average person.

You can also post up crap to phish, con and cheat the gullible.

But the moment you post up a 19389807_10155631814616844_1606144477_n.thumb.jpg.dbf36adb18564e8b5f3dad5ceebf4944.jpgpic of a wine bottle......oh no!! The FB Nazis are on you!!:lol:

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It’s because it’s fake news! We all know your cock is like a hamsters cotton bud ;)

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8 hours ago, Lard Bazaar said:

It’s because it’s fake cock! We all know your cock is like a hamsters cotton bud ;)

EFA.:D

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Not going to go into any exact details, but there has been some family drama going on the past two days and I’m not in a great mood at all right now...

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It's the season, normal for the festivities.

 

That's why Valentine's Day is in February...

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34 minutes ago, Joey Russ said:

Not going to go into any exact details, but there has been some family drama going on the past two days and I’m not in a great mood at all right now...

Fuck, it isn't , is it?

You are Max Branning outta Eastenders!!:lol:

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On 4/9/2017 at 21:38, msc said:

 

I was going to say how its funny how Brian Taylor is two years younger than Gavin Esler but no one would twig that without knowing, but no one would get that one bar Willz and charon...

 

Brian Taylor (Scottish BBC political guy) was on Celeb University Challenge tonight (it's the 2017 one so relatively recent) and actually looks less like shit than usual. You know, for Brian Taylor of late.

 

 

brian taylor christmas 2017.png

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21 hours ago, msc said:

 

Brian Taylor (Scottish BBC political guy) was on Celeb University Challenge tonight (it's the 2017 one so relatively recent) and actually looks less like shit than usual. You know, for Brian Taylor of late.

 

 

brian taylor christmas 2017.png

I am in no way sizeist or owt but, honestly, he looks that humungeous it looks like he has eaten the rest of the contestants.

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And that's him after he's lost weight!

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I've just tried the alt.obituaries deadpool for the first time.

 

I've probably erred on the side of "too safe" regarding obitability, but I'm not in the mood to argue. As such, it was tough to come up with 40 names. About 5 of them are real outside chances and 5 other names I will probably not pick again.

 

Edit: Yes, everything got accepted. Means it was probably too safe, no Leah Bracknell, for example.

 

Edit nr. 2: Ha, Carsten Mohren was a hit?? Oh, I was MUCH too safe.

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The rule is they have to get a legitimate obit, which is any major obit source from anywhere really (minus tabloids and such). Which is why one of my deathrace fodder got accepted...

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1 minute ago, Joey Russ said:

The rule is they have to get a legitimate obit, which is any major obit source from anywhere really (minus tabloids and such). Which is why one of my deathrace fodder got accepted...

 

They also need to have international fame IN the US. Which is where non-Yank me falls down a lot.

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4 minutes ago, msc said:

 

They also need to have international fame IN the US. Which is where non-Yank me falls down a lot.

I actually have a couple of people who made it through that aren’t notable in the US at all. To be more precise, Patrick Cryne surprisingly made it through...

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I think it's roughly the fame standards of the Poker Tourney but any reputable news source is a-ok, regardless of language. Just look at all the "very well known in their homeland, nonentities elsewhere" names JiroemonKimura scored with this year.

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