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Lord Fellatio Nelson

DL Status Updates: Statements, Obsevations & Verbal Tennis

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The contestants on Tipping Point.

As thick as pig shit, the lot of them.

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Contestants on most of those shows, surely. Always love the response to "What famous writer, first name Charles, wrote A Christmas Carol?" type questions for dummies being "Oh, I wouldn't know, I don't do books..."

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2 hours ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said:

The contestants on Tipping Point.

As thick as pig shit, the lot of them.

Dear Goodness LFN - are you going for a challenge *~~* this afternoon?  Sir, I salute you.

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1 hour ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said:

The contestants on Tipping Point.

As thick as pig shit, the lot of them.

I think it is one of the requirements. They take the ones that are too bright for Catchphrase.

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3 hours ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said:

The contestants on Tipping Point.

As thick as pig shit, the lot of them.

You actually watch that utter fucking patronising pile of horsewank? 

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2 minutes ago, Lard Bazaar said:

You actually watch that utter fucking patronising pile of horsewank? 

Normally I'm at work but, today, I was off and it was on.

It is utter fucking shit, I would agree.

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1 minute ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said:

Normally I'm at work but, today, I was off and it was on.

It is utter fucking shit, I would agree.

Redeemed only by the scintillating presentation of the always entertaining Ben Shepherd.

 

(j/k)

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1 hour ago, time said:

Redeemed only by the scintillating presentation of the always entertaining Ben Shepherd.

 

(j/k)

I’ve had more entertaining shits.

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1 hour ago, Lard Bazaar said:

I’ve had more entertaining shits.

There's a reason my TV only gets turned on for sports. Of course, some commentators are right up that alley as well. 

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1 hour ago, Lard Bazaar said:

I’ve had more entertaining shits.

| suspect that's a kebab-variable tipping point...

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Heading to the capital today to go join the teachers in protest of poor education spending...

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@Joey Russ How is the health of former Governor George Nigh (aged 90)? One we should be looking out for?

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Nothing that I could find on him. 

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I predict a big death this weekend.

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I am very happy to say that I have finally been able to mow the lawn.  Well, I say lawn, it's mostly moss, but with some brutally overgrown tufty patches.

For once the grass went into proper winter hibernation, so there was no need to do it after the end of October.

However the incessant rain and snow has created a jungle with no opportunity to get at it until today.

Add to that the fact that the elderly lawnmower has spent the winter inside a very leaky shed (the winds having ripped off all the roofing felt) and you will understand that I was very relieved when it started at the second pull and coped with the dreaded task effectively if a touch reluctantly.

 

Maybe I should have posted this under Weather. 

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2 hours ago, Toast said:

I am very happy to say that I have finally been able to mow the lawn.  Well, I say lawn, it's mostly moss, but with some brutally overgrown tufty patches.

For once the grass went into proper winter hibernation, so there was no need to do it after the end of October.

However the incessant rain and snow has created a jungle with no opportunity to get at it until today.

Add to that the fact that the elderly lawnmower has spent the winter inside a very leaky shed (the winds having ripped off all the roofing felt) and you will understand that I was very relieved when it started at the second pull and coped with the dreaded task effectively if a touch reluctantly.

 

Maybe I should have posted this under Weather. 

I have the same problem Toastie.

That's down to my age.:lol:

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3 minutes ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said:

I have the same problem Toastie.

That's down to my age.:lol:

<Harold Steptoe voice>

You dirty old man

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2 hours ago, Toast said:

I am very happy to say that I have finally been able to mow the lawn.  Well, I say lawn, it's mostly moss, but with some brutally overgrown tufty patches.

For once the grass went into proper winter hibernation, so there was no need to do it after the end of October.

However the incessant rain and snow has created a jungle with no opportunity to get at it until today.

Add to that the fact that the elderly lawnmower has spent the winter inside a very leaky shed (the winds having ripped off all the roofing felt) and you will understand that I was very relieved when it started at the second pull and coped with the dreaded task effectively if a touch reluctantly.

 

Maybe I should have posted this under Weather. 

I actually did some gardening today.

I dug out all the old plants and crap a couple of weeks ago, today I laid some of that matting ( to stop the weeds coming through ) along the beds and, tomorrow, I shall mostly be getting a hernia hauling bags of bark into the garden and various shrubs and stuff.

I have always wanted a flowery, mature garden that smells lovely and looks lovely when in full bloom.

My God, I intend to achieve it!! :)

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Retirement imminent then lfn.... Death soon thereafter.

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50 minutes ago, charon said:

Retirement imminent then lfn.... Death soon thereafter.

Never.

I'm going to live as long as I fucking can to piss as many people off as I can.:D

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1 hour ago, Lord Fellatio Nelson said:

Never.

I'm going to live as long as I fucking can to piss as many people off as I can.:D

 

I prefer the Eric Bristow school of thought.

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5 minutes ago, Deathray said:

 

I prefer the Eric Bristow school of thought.

 

5 minutes ago, Deathray said:

 

I prefer the Eric Bristow school of thought.

I'm fairly confident that he did not envisage dropping down dead in a Liverpool car park.

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Just now, Lord Fellatio Nelson said:

 

I'm fairly confident that he did not envisage dropping down dead in a Liverpool car park.

 

He lived his life to the full the way he wanted to to great excess, knowing it would lead to an early death.

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