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Bibliogryphon

Sad Last Days

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Welcome to the Sad Last Days thread.

 

This is not a place for the academic and erudite discussion about potential future picks which would take place in the Ideas and Possibilities thread.

 

This is where we discuss those celebrities who constantly feature in the pages of National Enquirier (and similar sordid titles) where the journalist seems to have hit upon a picture of a celebrity looking a bit rough and decide to write about their iminent death with the scattergun approach that a few times they will be right.

 

They will also like to invoke aspects of tragedy to the rich and powerful celebrities such as family fueds, hidden secrets, arguments about estates or just the decline of their careers.

 

If a wise and enlightened moderator can move over the posts I put in I & P when I suggested this thread we can get the ball rolling.

 

In the UK we can only get the print version of NE. Access to the website is blocked so our US posters may be vital to the success of this thread and it might be a bit pointless to post links.

 

What we are looking for is how often they are right and how many times they can call SLD before it becomes true.

 

SLD can also be read as Tragic final weeks, Fighting for life or accepting their fate.

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I can't mind if you'd seen this one, but The Globe ran with Alan Alda's "sad last days" the other week, based on a photo of him looking 79 years old. Last decades, if you asked me.

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Perfect. An hour ago I found their article on how the death of his mother has pushed Michael Douglas "into a tailspin":

 

www.nationalenquirer.com/celebrity/michael-douglas-freaks-out-cancer-death-mom
(I have to experiment with the way their pages are blocked for me.)
This comes, of course, three months after the article on Michael Douglas's "tragic last days":
www.nationalenquirer.com/celebrity/michael-douglas-tragic-last-days
Edit: I have to experiment with the format for a while. This post is a work in progress.
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I can't mind if you'd seen this one, but The Globe ran with Alan Alda's "sad last days" the other week, based on a photo of him looking 79 years old. Last decades, if you asked me.

 

That is exactly the sort of gutter journalism we are looking for one photo can be extrapolated to a whole double page spread.

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And the Cher story from this week that I believe set us all up for this thread:

 

Cher-Dying.png

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Perfect. An hour ago I found their article on how the death of his mother has pushed Michael Douglas "into a tailspin":

 

www.nationalenquirer.com%2Fcelebrity%2Fmichael-douglas-freaks-out-cancer-death-mom
(I have to experiment with the way their pages are blocked for me.)
This comes, of course, three months after the article on Michael Douglas's "tragic last days":
www.nationalenquirer.com%2Fcelebrity%2Fmichael-douglas-tragic-last-days
Edit: I have to experiment with the format for a while. This post is a work in progress.

 

 

Though now he is boasting of his assets and success with the ladies.

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And the Cher story from this week that I believe set us all up for this thread:

 

Cher-Dying.png

 

I copied and pasted the entire Cher story in another thread last week prior to this one being set up for the benefit of those unable to access The National Enquirer site due to limited access.

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Rene Angelil is bound to have featured, on deaths bed etc etc...

 

Updates please :)

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Rene Angelil is bound to have featured, on deaths bed etc etc...

 

Updates please :)

Of course not because he is very ill and probably is on his death bed:!!!!!

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Rene Angelil is bound to have featured, on deaths bed etc etc...

 

Updates please :)

 

There's this from June 12th

 

 

Heartbroken CELINE DION is racing across the country in a desperate bid to save dying husband René Angélil!

“Celine can’t bear to think that René could be at the end,” a close family friend told The National ENQUIRER.

“She’s determined to do everything possible to keep him alive. Now they’re hoping an aggressive treatment at a top Boston hospital will extend his life!”

The megastar is giving up her Las Vegas home for the temporary move with her three children, as cancer-stricken René, 73, begins treatment at the renowned Massachusetts General Hospital

“Celine can’t come to grips with him dying,” said the insider. “They’ve been together since she was 19!”

René was first diagnosed with cancer in 1999 – but in the last two years his health has rapidly deteriorated.

His throat cancer has spread, forcing the removal of part of his tongue.

He’s also undergone more than 130 radiation treatments and has difficulty hearing.

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http://www.celebdirtylaundry.com/2015/celine-dion-leaves-husband-rene-angelil-cancer-dying-performance-las-vegas-power-of-love-gala-dying-wish/:I also found this from a similar site.I know these stories are unreliable but does any one else think they are likely to be not too far from the truth?I mean it has been confirmed the guy is still fighting throat cancer and is on a feeding tube as well as previously having heart problems.I don`t think he has got long.

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http://www.celebdirtylaundry.com/2015/celine-dion-leaves-husband-rene-angelil-cancer-dying-performance-las-vegas-power-of-love-gala-dying-wish/:I also found this from a similar site.I know these stories are unreliable but does any one else think they are likely to be not too far from the truth?I mean it has been confirmed the guy is still fighting throat cancer and is on a feeding tube as well as previously having heart problems.I don`t think he has got long.

 

Celine Dion walked in to a bar in Vegas and the barman said "Why the long face"?

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The-National-Enquirer-is-firmly-standing

 

Macaulay Culkin

 

61zx0oDnZOL._SX258_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg

 

Every James Bond star ever

omfg a child star isn't cute anymore he must be terminally ill

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The-National-Enquirer-is-firmly-standing

 

Macaulay Culkin

 

61zx0oDnZOL._SX258_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg

 

Every James Bond star ever

omfg a child star isn't cute anymore he must be terminally ill

 

Not terminally ill, just addicted to various drugs.

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The-National-Enquirer-is-firmly-standing

 

Macaulay Culkin

61zx0oDnZOL._SX258_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg

 

Every James Bond star ever

 

omfg a child star isn't cute anymore he must be terminally ill

Not terminally ill, just addicted to various drugs.
they can't tell the difference

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The National Enquirer is funnier than The Onion.

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Let's see:

 

Michael Douglas "SAD LAST DAYS", 16th of April 2015, still alive

Joan Kennedy "SAD LAST DAYS", 15th of April 2015, still alive

Larry Fortensky "SAD LAST DAYS", 23rd of March 2015, still alive

Joanne Woodward "SAD LAST DAYS", 21st of November 2014, still alive

Zsa Zsa Gabor "SAD LAST DAYS", 9th of September 2014, still alive

Jerry Lewis "THE END?", 19th of January 2015, still alive

Olivia De Havilland "SAD LAST DAYS", 26th of September 2014, still alive

Maureen O'Hara "SAD LAST DAYS", 15th of July 2014, still alive

James Garner "SAD LAST DAYS", 28th of May 2014, DEAD 19th of July 2014!

Jack Nicholson "THE LONELY WORLD OF... (includes "sad last days"), 2nd of February 2015, still alive

Glen Campbell "Inside The Sad Last Days of...", 20th of June 2014, still alive

Anna Nicole Smith's mother "DEATHBED PLEA", 26th of February 2015, still alive

Billy Graham "SAD LAST DAYS", 20th of december 2013, still alive

Mary Tyler Moore "THE AGONY OF...", 9th of March 2013, still alive

Burt Reynolds "ON BORROWED TIME (...) SAD LAST DAYS", 17th of August 2012, still alive

Andy Williams "SAD LAST DAYS", 5th of July 2012, DEAD 25th of September 2012!

Don Rickles "SAD LAST DAYS", 27th of March 2013, still alive

Robert Schuller "SAD LAST DAYS", 31st of December 2012, DEAD 2nd of April 2015!

Nancy Reagan "SAD LAST DAYS", 5th of December 2012, still alive

Jim Bakker "SAD LAST DAYS", 11th of January 2013, still alive

Levon Helm "SAD LAST DAYS", 18th of April 2012, DEAD 19th of April 2012!!!

 

Then the most relevant hits stop... Only that very last one is truly impressive. Two more are at least within 3 months. So that's three out of 21...

 

Also, Mariah Carey's brother thinks she will die just like Whitney Houston:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-3109625/Mariah-Carey-s-brother-fears-die-like-Whitney-Houston-claims-pop-star-addicted-alcohol-prescription-drugs.html

 

That article turned up through the same web search for some reason...

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The National Enquirer is funnier than The Onion.

 

The Onion has it's moments, I prefer reading The Daily Currant

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Let's see:

 

Michael Douglas "SAD LAST DAYS", 16th of April 2015, still alive

Joan Kennedy "SAD LAST DAYS", 15th of April 2015, still alive

Larry Fortensky "SAD LAST DAYS", 23rd of March 2015, still alive

Joanne Woodward "SAD LAST DAYS", 21st of November 2014, still alive

Zsa Zsa Gabor "SAD LAST DAYS", 9th of September 2014, still alive

Jerry Lewis "THE END?", 19th of January 2015, still alive

Olivia De Havilland "SAD LAST DAYS", 26th of September 2014, still alive

Maureen O'Hara "SAD LAST DAYS", 15th of July 2014, still alive

James Garner "SAD LAST DAYS", 28th of May 2014, DEAD 19th of July 2014!

Jack Nicholson "THE LONELY WORLD OF... (includes "sad last days"), 2nd of February 2015, still alive

Glen Campbell "Inside The Sad Last Days of...", 20th of June 2014, still alive

Anna Nicole Smith's mother "DEATHBED PLEA", 26th of February 2015, still alive

Billy Graham "SAD LAST DAYS", 20th of december 2013, still alive

Mary Tyler Moore "THE AGONY OF...", 9th of March 2013, still alive

Burt Reynolds "ON BORROWED TIME (...) SAD LAST DAYS", 17th of August 2012, still alive

Andy Williams "SAD LAST DAYS", 5th of July 2012, DEAD 25th of September 2012!

Don Rickles "SAD LAST DAYS", 27th of March 2013, still alive

Robert Schuller "SAD LAST DAYS", 31st of December 2012, DEAD 2nd of April 2015!

Nancy Reagan "SAD LAST DAYS", 5th of December 2012, still alive

Jim Bakker "SAD LAST DAYS", 11th of January 2013, still alive

Levon Helm "SAD LAST DAYS", 18th of April 2012, DEAD 19th of April 2012!!!

 

Then the most relevant hits stop... Only that very last one is truly impressive. Two more are at least within 3 months. So that's three out of 21...

 

(...)

I didn't follow Levon Helm's story at the time. However, according to Wikipedia (yeah, not an authoritative source, but still), his wife broke the news (that he was dying) and asked for prayers on the 17th of April. So it wasn't "gut feeling" or "insider information"; they just did their research. But anyways, they wouldn't be very successful @ dead pools.

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Let's see:

 

Michael Douglas "SAD LAST DAYS", 16th of April 2015, still alive

Joan Kennedy "SAD LAST DAYS", 15th of April 2015, still alive

Larry Fortensky "SAD LAST DAYS", 23rd of March 2015, still alive

Joanne Woodward "SAD LAST DAYS", 21st of November 2014, still alive

Zsa Zsa Gabor "SAD LAST DAYS", 9th of September 2014, still alive

Jerry Lewis "THE END?", 19th of January 2015, still alive

Olivia De Havilland "SAD LAST DAYS", 26th of September 2014, still alive

Maureen O'Hara "SAD LAST DAYS", 15th of July 2014, still alive

James Garner "SAD LAST DAYS", 28th of May 2014, DEAD 19th of July 2014!

Jack Nicholson "THE LONELY WORLD OF... (includes "sad last days"), 2nd of February 2015, still alive

Glen Campbell "Inside The Sad Last Days of...", 20th of June 2014, still alive

Anna Nicole Smith's mother "DEATHBED PLEA", 26th of February 2015, still alive

Billy Graham "SAD LAST DAYS", 20th of december 2013, still alive

Mary Tyler Moore "THE AGONY OF...", 9th of March 2013, still alive

Burt Reynolds "ON BORROWED TIME (...) SAD LAST DAYS", 17th of August 2012, still alive

Andy Williams "SAD LAST DAYS", 5th of July 2012, DEAD 25th of September 2012!

Don Rickles "SAD LAST DAYS", 27th of March 2013, still alive

Robert Schuller "SAD LAST DAYS", 31st of December 2012, DEAD 2nd of April 2015!

Nancy Reagan "SAD LAST DAYS", 5th of December 2012, still alive

Jim Bakker "SAD LAST DAYS", 11th of January 2013, still alive

Levon Helm "SAD LAST DAYS", 18th of April 2012, DEAD 19th of April 2012!!!

 

Then the most relevant hits stop... Only that very last one is truly impressive. Two more are at least within 3 months. So that's three out of 21...

 

Also, Mariah Carey's brother thinks she will die just like Whitney Houston:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-3109625/Mariah-Carey-s-brother-fears-die-like-Whitney-Houston-claims-pop-star-addicted-alcohol-prescription-drugs.html

 

That article turned up through the same web search for some reason...

 

This is the sort of serious research we need on this site.

 

However you would be over qualified for work on the National Enquirer

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On this week's National Enquirer, Kirstie Alley has "two years to live" with friends worried over her "battle with deadly disease". I think the deadly disease in question is "cakes".

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On this week's National Enquirer, Kirstie Alley has "two years to live" with friends worried over her "battle with deadly disease". I think the deadly disease in question is "cakes".

 

 

Kirstie Alley no doubt says cheers to this vote of confidence, as it ensures she will live for another decade or two.

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If we were to take NE advice and include someone like Cher, Michael Douglas or Alan Alda on the main list does mean that they might get the chance to challenge Clive Dunn for most appearances on the list before they die. If you are 90+ and making your debut then the chances of making more than 13 or 14 appearances is very slim (unlike Kirstie Alley)

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Having had cause to try a proxy server (to watch something on pbs that is IP restricted) I took the opportunity to look at the National Enquirer site having seen here that you can't access it from the UK, I hastily disengaged the proxy and decided I don't mind being excluded from some places.

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