maryportfuncity 10,657 Posted May 13, 2016 Death Slam Form Guide #13 Emma Morano (b 29-11-1899) Super-centenarian superstar, older than anyone else alive and likely to lose that title the way almost everyone else so encumbered loses theirs; with an obitable death suitable for dead pool points in most good dead pools. Potential pick par excellence for the MMMDP since any qualifying obitable death will be good enough to win. On the other hand, this one's a tough old bird and the picture above shows her receiving the news of Maryport's latest death slam with typical stoicism. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,657 Posted May 15, 2016 Death slam form guide #14 Clarissa Eden The one in the dress (obviously) clocking up 40 years a widow if she sees next January and one of those "fuck sake!! is she still alive" jobbies. Low profile to the point younger dead poolers might well be ignorant of who she is until such time as the qualifying obit appears. Then again, outing her hereabouts as a living relic of a bygone era levels the playing field for anyone picking Midsummer Dead Pool talent, eh? If the above mystifies you, the bloke with her was Prime Minister of the UK so long ago they hadn't invented colour photographs, apparently. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
msc 18,479 Posted May 15, 2016 Death slam form guide #14 Clarissa Eden The one in the dress (obviously) clocking up 40 years a widow if she sees next January and one of those "fuck sake!! is she still alive" jobbies. Low profile to the point younger dead poolers might well be ignorant of who she is until such time as the qualifying obit appears. Then again, outing her hereabouts as a living relic of a bygone era levels the playing field for anyone picking Midsummer Dead Pool talent, eh? If the above mystifies you, the bloke with her was Prime Minister of the UK so long ago they hadn't invented colour photographs, apparently. I've read her book. It came out a decade ago, but the memoirs themselves end right when Sir Anthony died, as if she did nothing of note in the last 40 odd years. True story. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Deathray 2,941 Posted May 15, 2016 Are we sure she's definitely alive? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
msc 18,479 Posted May 15, 2016 Are we sure she's definitely alive? Yes. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,657 Posted May 16, 2016 Are we sure she's definitely alive? Yes. And obitable Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,657 Posted May 18, 2016 The games begin a fortnight today - entries in 13 days. Just thought I'd, like, mention it Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Spade_Cooley 9,538 Posted May 18, 2016 I've got my undoubtedly world-famous pick primed and ready to go as soon as June arrives. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bibliogryphon 9,588 Posted May 18, 2016 Deathslam Form Guide #15 Lord Peter Carrington The Never Ending Tory who is famous for resigning as Foreign Secretary during the Falklands crisis. He served in Winston Churchill's cabinet but has never been an MP so confuses deadpoolers when he doesn't appear on lists of elderly MPs. Some say he has 100 written all over him but the committee have picked him twice. Will he make it to the solstice? 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,657 Posted May 22, 2016 Deathslam form guide #16 Jean Kennedy Smith Number eight in a family of nine kids but now - aged 88 - the only surviving member of a clan that included her president big bro JFK, and a couple of other noted philanderers. Rose to the dizzy heights of US ambassador to Ireland in her own career. Her longevity is summat of an achievement when violent death claimed around half her siblings (including a couple totalled in crashing aircraft) and certainly obitable. Will she get your vote? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bibliogryphon 9,588 Posted May 23, 2016 Deathslam Form Guide #17 Rodney Bewes Whatever Happened To The Likely Lads? They got really old. Whilst James Bolam has kept in the public eye by appearing on New Tricks and now has a legion of young fans a Grandpa in my Pocket, poor old Rodney appeared in one of the worst episodes of Doctor Who and has only makes the papers when arguing with Olivia Harrison about his pussy. Is this Rodney's last opportunity for the limelight? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,657 Posted May 23, 2016 Deathslam Form Guide #17 Rodney Bewes Whatever Happened To The Likely Lads? They got really old. Whilst James Bolam has kept in the public eye by appearing on New Tricks and now has a legion of young fans a Grandpa in my Pocket, poor old Rodney appeared in one of the worst episodes of Doctor Who and has only makes the papers when arguing with Olivia Harrison about his pussy. Is this Rodney's last opportunity for the limelight? Is that really Rodney Bewes, or is it the picture in Salman Rushdie's attic? 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CaptainChorizo 1,984 Posted May 24, 2016 Deathslam Form Guide #18 Nature Boy Ric Flair You could pick some 97 year old who is sitting on their rocking chair wating for the Grim Reaper or someone with terminal cancer I guess. Why not instead go for a person who thinks they are above the laws of nature and can put death in a figure 4 leg lock. Midsummer could be the end of the Stylin', profilin', limousine riding, jet flying, kiss-stealing, wheelin' n' dealin' son of a gun who is still partying and treating his liver like it's 1986. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bibliogryphon 9,588 Posted May 24, 2016 Deathslam Form Guide #19 Sheila Mercier Sheila is now 97 and was last seen playing soap matriarch Annie Sugden in Emmerdale in 2009 (which is where that photo is taken from). In the battle of the soap queens will she prevail in the Midsummer deadpool? 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Spade_Cooley 9,538 Posted May 24, 2016 Death Slam Form Guide #11 Ladies and gentlemen, Mr Burt Kwouk! The only Chinese guy allowed on British TV for 20 years, before the invention of David Yip sometime in the 1980s. Depending on your generation, you'll know him either as the racially suspect Kato in the Pink Panther films, the racially suspect prison guard in Tenko or the racially suspect ethnic foil in the Harry Hill Show. Would have appeared in last year's Mrs Brown's Boys movie, except he's apparently housebound now due to an unspecified illness. We can now exclusively reveal on the DL forums that said illness is "wanting to stay the fuck away from the movie version of Mrs Brown's Boys". Tipster king... 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Grim Up North 3,727 Posted May 24, 2016 Fuck - this death slam guide is pretty impressive - 2 hits in about 3 weeks. Good shout Spade - if you were actually going to pick him (but who really does a Death slam Guide for someone they are actually going to pick!) then you were 8 days short, unlucky. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,657 Posted May 24, 2016 Fuck - this death slam guide is pretty impressive - 2 hits in about 3 weeks. Good shout Spade - if you were actually going to pick him (but who really does a Death slam Guide for someone they are actually going to pick!) then you were 8 days short, unlucky. Aye, should we start another form guide in December, it seems to cull the weaker ones who ain't fit to make the start line Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Youwanticewiththat 611 Posted May 24, 2016 Death Slam #20 I say, Ding Dong! Seen in his last role as Cyrano de Bergerac it's another Death Slam top totterer LESLIE PHILLIPS. 'Hello' was one of his catchphrases.... but I predict a snappy goodbye for the lad in The Navy Lark. Lumme! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Spade_Cooley 9,538 Posted May 25, 2016 Death Slam Form Guide #21 Ryan Buell Ha. Hahahaha. Hahaha. Bwahhahahahhahahahahahahahahaha. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bibliogryphon 9,588 Posted May 25, 2016 Deathslam Form Guide #21 Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI Celebration of the solstice is a pagan act not supported by the Holy Catholic See but a damned good funeral is a coming together of Christians. Will Josef do the right thing by his former flock? Or will our hopes go up in smoke? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Deathray 2,941 Posted May 25, 2016 Death slam form guide #23 Eileen Derbyshire The 84 year old actor has worked on the soap Coronation Street potraying Emily Bishop (ne Nugent) since 1961, rarely taking a break from filming. She has only been interviewed about the character a handful of times in her entire career, in a documentary for Margot Bryant's memorium and when she recieved her MBE being the most noticeable ones and never attends award ceremonies. She could well be quietly retiring in order to have the final few years of her life in peace and avoid the fanfare of having to make a farewell emily documentary for ITV by officially retiring or she could have stopped filming due a private illness. Given past pedigree of corrie stars taking a short break and dying such as Blanche Hunt's Maggie Jones and Diedre Barlow's Anne Kirkbride it's worth keeping an eye on. She's due to return from her break after "a few months" from new year, it's now been nearly 6 months... 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
maryportfuncity 10,657 Posted May 25, 2016 Reet gang Work is insanely busy at the moment but I guarantee I'll be back in action hereabouts on 31 May to compile a masterlist. 9-00 BST that day entries open. Hopefully the bandwidth will take the onslaught. Basically, first come first served until 20 people have bagged one unique pick each and battle commences in the first seconds of June - BST See yers then 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bibliogryphon 9,588 Posted May 26, 2016 Reet gang Work is insanely busy at the moment but I guarantee I'll be back in action hereabouts on 31 May to compile a masterlist. 9-00 BST that day entries open. Hopefully the bandwidth will take the onslaught. Basically, first come first served until 20 people have bagged one unique pick each and battle commences in the first seconds of June - BST See yers then Does this mean you won't have time to enter SHBDP? :-( Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bibliogryphon 9,588 Posted May 26, 2016 Death slam form guide #24 Cher For regular readers of National Enquirer Pop Star and Actress Cher is their pin up girl. Either "Increasingly frail Cher is enduring her said last days because (select from drop down menu) and is preparing to be reunited with Sonny" or she doesn't take a good photograph when she puts out the trash and there just happens to be a photographer outside her house". Is this evidence enough for you to pin your victory in this all or nothing competition? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Deathray 2,941 Posted May 26, 2016 Deathslam Guide #25 Nobby Stiles Famous for being a member of the 1966 World Cup squad that etched up a 4-2 against Germany in the final and that gap-toothed run with the cup after the victory, Nobby Stiles has been suffering from alzhiemers for about four year. His family appealed for privacy in November after journalists pariahed his home to get news (Manchester Evening News) so he could be in a much worse condition than is known to the public. I really think from the beginning of December we should do one of these for the DL from December 1st. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
