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The 2019 Deathlist Cup

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Ok, for newcomers and nostalgists, I present The Deathlist Cup... the story so far.

 

 

Deathlist Cup
2017

 

 

Round 1
1. Young Willz 0-4 Captain Chorizo
2. Maryportfuncity 2-8 Morbid Kid
Maryportfuncity wins by DQ.
3. Grim Up North 8-4 Joey Russ
4. Deathray 2-8 Heef
5. Chopped Liver 2-9 Garn
6. Shaun of the Dead 2-4 RadGuy
7. Charon 2-9 The Dead Cow
8. Switch 4-2 Rockhopperpenguin
9. Pedro67 7-2 Jiroemon Kimura
10. msc 4-7 gcreptile

 

This Round was surprisingly controversial. Toast had avoided the Cup, predicting a whole host of nasty FFBI picks and proved to be 100% accurate with coma victims and other non-entities gaining points (Norma Cook – who?), and creating the FFBI Ban now in place. Chopped Liver predicted success, got gubbed, and flounced off the forum. The Kid got banned off the forum for a month at an inappropriate time (3 days before Round  2) and was unable to get a team in in time, leaving Maryport to sneak into Round 2.

Elsewhere Joey and Grim trade insults for a month before that game was decided on the death of Sir Gerald Kaufman late on, whilst Willz’s sterling defence against the 2016 DDP runnersup was ended by the death of actress Sara Coward. There was a bit of a to do when The Dead Cow’s pick, da Silva, was brain dead, but she was dead dead soon enough. Forum newcomer Heef showed promise.

The first hit in Cup history was confirmed at 1.40am on the 1st February 2017 – Bernie Portenski – and provided point for Reptile and Heef. Yer host did level later that day with the demise of Desmond Carrington, but was soon outgunned by one of the forums better researchers and his pick of Trinidadian historian Angelo Bissessarsingh. Yes, that explains that running reference…

 Oh, and DDT had mutant sheep to deal with, thus instantly being a far more interesting character than some of the actual hits…

 

Round 2
1. RadGuy 1-0 Bibliogryphon
2. The Dead Cow 8-9 Death Impends
3. Heef 4-3 Garn
4. Maryportfuncity 0-3 Spade Cooley
5. Captain Chorizo 1-1 Grim Up North,
Grim Up North won on penalties
6. Switch 0-2 DDT
7. Deadsox 0-0 Pedro67,
Deadsox won on penalties
8. Roverandout 2-8 gcreptile

Biblio was later to say losing to a FFBI pick was like Rad diving for a penalty! Lisa Magill, for the record. DDT and Spade were, perhaps unfairly, expected to cruise through, but both did just enough and no more, both advancing through the death of Tania Dalton. Deadsox and Pedro deadlocked, with Deadsox advancing on penalties, with no sign of what was to come. Rover bounced into Round 2 on a BYE and swiftly bounced back out again by Reptile (who went ahead less than 30 minutes into the month!). Also, Heef contained to show promise by easing out well respected DDP regular Garn (that’s top 20 regular Poochie…), another match Dalton proved crucial in deciding.

The headlines came from a hard fought clash between forum assassin Death Impends, and young up and comer Dead Cow. “Hoping to avoid a massacre” said the Cow pre-game, and he did, only to lose in heartbreaking circumstances.  Both scored early with Tania Dalton (2-2), journalist May Johnson (4-4) and Cardinal Vlk (6-6). Then, on the 26th March, comic book artist Oliver Nome died, and Cow took the lead 8-6. He missed the unique point as Reptile (miles ahead and looking forward to a Quarterfinal with the winner of this tie) also had him.That proved crucial as football coach Ken Sparks died on the 29th and that unique point was the difference between the two, with DI winning 9-8.

 

 

Quarterfinals
1. DDT 3-1 RadGuy
2. gcreptile 2-16 Death Impends
3. Spade Cooley 2-4 Deadsox
4. Grim Up North 6-6 Heef,
Heef advances on "away goals".

 

Heef took out another victim, Grim, in a high scoring game, with horse racing Tony Kaye providing the crucial assist.  Rad momentarily had the shock on with a FFBI pick, before DDT won with Bishop Perham. DDT v Spade came up as a provisional Semifinal, but deadsox had other ideas. Spade took the lead with SF academic Michael Levy, before deadsox levelled with Emma Morano, before winning with Sasha Lakovic.

Elsewhere, the only shock in DI v Reptile was how one sided it was, with DI gaining hits off a spree killer, academic Levy, John Vennari, Tom Modrak, Barry Marshall-Everitt, Lucky Ackhand and a priest.

 

 

Semifinals
1. DDT 0-2 Deadsox
2. Death Impends 11-8 Heef

 

Deadsox followed up his Spade shocker, by beating deadpoolings own GOAT, via a FFBI pick.  Meanwhile, it was the end of the road for Heef in another exciting tie. Bishop Niederauer gave DI a 3-0 lead, before Vicki Letele made it 3-3. (Originally 3-2, but Heef made a compelling case with evidence for her not being a FFB case.) Then Earl Sinks died to make it 6-3 DI, before Dina Merrill made it 6-6 again. All this time we were awaiting a LOTL obit, but Earl Hagman’s death made it crucially 9-6 DI, with Kiwi Heef beaten by a New Zealand pick! Noriega provided points for both teams late in the month.

 

 

Final
1. Deadsox 5-2 Death Impends

Deadsox had been tough opposition, and this looked set to come down to 1 pick. And it did, only it was Julia Perez, whom Deadsox had. And so,  Deadsox won the 1st DL Cup, beating Spade, DDT and DI in consecutive rounds to do so.

 

 

2018 Deathlist Cup

Round One

1.  Charon vs Maryportfuncity  6-0

2.  Pedro vs The Dead Cow 3-13

3.  Young Willz vs The Engineer 0-0

*Willz won 3-2 on pens

4.  Grim Up North vs Yorkshire Banker 6-3

5.  Msc vs Wormfarmer 3-0

6.  Spade Cooley vs Roverandout 3-9

7.  Joey Russ vs Garn  7-0

8.  Bibliogryphon vs Phantom of the Midway (AKA Rad Guy) 0-6

9.  Sean vs Fixed Business 9-0

10. Gcreptile  vs John Key 7-3

11. Deathray vs Sir Creep  0-3

12.  Captain Chorizo vs Book 3-3

 

The first DL Cup hit of 2018 was rapper Mowzey Radio with Joey scoring early and easing comfortably past Garn. Johnnie Lindsay was enough for Reptile. Barys Kits death put Yorkshire Banker and Pedro into somewhat shock leads, before  Grim and Cow pulled back. Liam Miller produced leads for charon and Rad. Author Bill Crider’s death was the diference between Wormfarmer and yours truly,  and also produced the age difference decider for Chorizo.  Spade took the lead with Prince Henrik, only for Morgan Tsvangirai to nod in the instant equaliser, and Catherine Nevin gave Rover the lead, before Billy Graham sealed the deal on the biggest Cup shock to date. That also took Sir Creep into the 2nd Round.

Willz won a best of 5 coin toss.

 

Round 2

Death Impends vs Heef 9-10

Gcreptile vs Sir Creep 6-14

Joey Russ vs Grim Up North 6-6

Phantom of the Midway vs The Dead Cow 10-13

Sean vs Charon 0-0

Roverandout vs DDT 0-6

Captain Chorizo vs Young Willz 0-4

msc vs Deadsox 6-7

 

 

Marieke Vervoort was on every single fucking team. And lived. Vanessa Lafaye died too early, and that, and dropping Bernie De Koven provided killer blows for myself. I was facing the holder, however, who scored with Carlo Ripa di Meana.

 

Rover’s chances of a second upset came to nowt via author Emma Hannigan, whereas Willz told everyone he stood no chance against Chorizo, only for Ken Dodd to have his say. Joey and Grim proved difficult to separate again.

Sir Creep d. Reptile. Sir Creep went 4-0 up early on. Both had Emma Hannigan (7-3). Sir Creep then sealed the deal with his own personal hero Tom Benson.

DI and Heef both had Goodwin (3-3), and Emma Hannigan (6-6). A man called Ed wound up being recinded from DI’s tally and Warren Grant died, so we had a disallowed goal and then Heef went 10-6 up.

Rad and Cow both had Goodwin (3-3), and Emma Hannigan (6-6), before football coach Shaun Bailey produced the killer blow for Dead Cow. Well, until Tony Kleese levelled it (10-10), before Bishop Lafoya DID seal it for the Cow.

 

Controversy everywhere. Multiple picks died in February, QOs were questioned, and the host quit… only to do a Roz Doyle and return and pretend nothing had happened. “Tripping off his tits” said one Highlander, probably close to the mark…

 

Quarterfinal

1. The  Dead Cow vs Sean 9-0

2.       Heef vs DDT 6-9

3.       Deadsox (reigning champ) vs YWillz 9-3

4.       Sir Creep vs Joey Russ 9-3

 

Cow took an early lead via Ray Wilkins and never looked back. Willz run ended against the holders, deadsox advancing on Ernie Thacker and, both having Mitzi Shore. Meanwhile Sir Creep continued to impress, easing past Joey. Joey took the lead with Wilkins, before Sir Creep levelled with Ernie Thacker, and took the lead with Bishop Foley. Heef put up a good challenge against DDT, coming up short. Both had Wilkins and Fergie McCormack, but DDT had Foley and Heef didn’t. Nabi Tajima sealed the deal against Willz and Joey.

 

Semis

Dead Cow v Sir Creep 4-7

DDT v Deadsox 7-0

Larry Hunter’s early death put Cow into a 4-0 lead. Once again Sir Creep suffered to a late breaking health issue he missed on one of his 40 hour rig jobs. David Goodall brought it back to 4-3, before the great Ted Dabney died late on, sending Sir Creep into the final at his first attempt.

Elsewhere, Morgan Job and David Goodall  meant that deadsox’s reign was ended by the great deadpooler DDT.

 

3rd place

Dead Cow v Deadsox 7-3

Jon Hiseman proved crucial. Both sides had Matt Cappotelli.

 

Final

DDT v Sir Creep 11-3

 

It was the old guard vs the new. Ignore for narrative purposes that Sir Creep is actually older. Ralph Santolla provided DDT with the 4-0 lead, and Fu Da Ren made it the quick 8-0. “You live by assisted suicide you die by assisted suicide” said the wise Sir. Both teams had Cappotelli, and that was that. Sir Creep did well, but found the old master too tough in the final. DDT won the 2018 Cup!

 

So in 2019…

Cup upsets, but from who?

Joey v Grim part 3? Heef v DI part 3?

Who will be the Sir Creep of 2019?

And indeed, will Sir Creep do a DI and reveal a brand new Curse of the Runner Up?

This and more in the coming months!

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We had 16 teams emerge from February and play in March. ( count 45 presently)
So I guess now it'll be 32 teams emerge and move on to March?  This will last till July then.

I suspect msc better get his coin-flipping skills down!

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4 minutes ago, Sir Creep said:

We had 16 teams emerge from February and play in March. ( count 45 presently)
So I guess now it'll be 32 teams emerge and move on to March?  This will last till July then.

I suspect msc better get his coin-flipping skills down!

 

Yeah 45 as it stands...

 

Round 1 - All bar 19, 13 ties - Feb

 

Round 2 - 19 plus 13 - march

 

Round 3 - last 16 - April

 

Round 4 - Quarters - May

 

Round 5 - Semis - June

 

Round 6-Final, 3rd place playoff - July

 

 

Oooh, wonder if I should put a Msc's Birthday Bonus for any hits in the final on July 6th! :lol:

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Well, your history post puts me in the mood, I have to say!

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So if each round is in consecutive months, we need to put in our team for each match before the previous one has finished, which means we wouldn't know whether we're in the next round or not? Is that right? Just to clarify... thanks!

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1 minute ago, BuffaloPhil said:

So if each round is in consecutive months, we need to put in our team for each match before the previous one has finished, which means we wouldn't know whether we're in the next round or not? Is that right? Just to clarify... thanks!

 

Yes, though usually folk can judge their chances accurately by then!

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Just now, msc said:

 

Yes, though usually folk can judge their chances accurately by then!

Cheers, I wholly expect to be out by the end of February anyway but I'll prepare a March list in case then :lol:

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News...

 

 

He won the 2013 DDP.

He won the 2014 DDP.

He won the 2015 DDP.

He won the 2016 DDP.

He hosts the 2018 and 2019 DDPs.

He also won the 2012 Deathrace.

 

And now... he's coming for the Cup.

 

 

Yep, Spade's in!

 

 

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8 minutes ago, msc said:

News...

 

 

He won the 2013 DDP.

He won the 2014 DDP.

He won the 2015 DDP.

He won the 2016 DDP.

He hosts the 2018 and 2019 DDPs.

He also won the 2012 Deathrace.

 

And now... he's coming for the Cup.

 

 

Yep, Spade's in!

 

 

Fuuuuuck......:lol:

 

I'm assuming I've got a bye and can put my feet up until the dying days of February before even think about a starting 11.

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5 minutes ago, YoungWillz said:

Fuuuuuck......:lol:

 

I'm assuming I've got a bye and can put my feet up until the dying days of February before even thing about a starting 11.

 

You were a Quarterfinalist. Pretty sure thats a Round 2 bye, short of unexpected last minute surges.

 

2 minutes ago, Spade_Cooley said:

Although I do have a fucking shit record in the Cup.

 

Aye, but with a losing score both times that'd take you through in most of the other ties.

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On ‎08‎/‎01‎/‎2019 at 00:42, Master Tech said:

I think I’ve bitten off more than I can chew here!! How do you peeps know such obscure, near dead celebs/well know figures? :( 

 

Mentioned elsewhere today but you could do worse than go to the Deathrace thread, find the masterlist on the first page and start Googling anyone you don't know. But he sure to check the list of the lost above to make sure they're still alive

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Ah, thought I accepted the invite. Yeah i'll be in this year!

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Great summary of the history from msc there.

 

Still gutted I was knocked out by a Kiwi in 2017. Bloody Earl Hagaman.

 

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36 minutes ago, Heef said:

Great summary of the history from msc there.

 

Still gutted I was knocked out by a Kiwi in 2017. Bloody Earl Hagaman.

 

 

At least you can take solace in getting revenge on me the following Cup!

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How many will make a dead cert like Stuart Fraser joker in r1 or instead go for a unique?

 

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14 hours ago, CaptainChorizo said:

 

How many will make a dead cert like Stuart Fraser joker in r1 or instead go for a unique?

 


I'd expect most teams to captain MC Ren.

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Round 1

(ties to be played in the month of February)

 

 

1.       JoeMoneyPenny Vs. Pedro

2.       Nantonian 2013 Vs. Maryportfuncity

3.       Gooseberry Crumble Vs. John Key

4.       Spade Cooley Vs. Squonk

5.       Dr T Vs. Markb4

6.       Banana Vs. Great Uncle Bulgaria

7.       Yorkshire Banker Vs. Skinny Kiltrunner

8.       Alt Obits Guy Vs. Time

9.       Clorox Vs. Fixed Business

10.   The Mad Hatter Vs. Exu

11.   Master Tech Vs. Bibliogryphon

12.   The Unknown Man Vs. Boudicca

13.   Torva Messor Vs. The Old Crem

14.   The Quim Reaper Vs. BuffaloPhil

15.   Wormfarmer Vs. The Old Lady

 

 

Teams may now be submitted for these matches. Closing deadline for that is midnight on the 31st, as usual.

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Round 2 DRAW

(matches to be played in March)

 

 

1.       Rad Vs.  Yorkshire Banker OR Skinny Kiltrunner

2.       Chorizo Vs. Grim Up North

3.       Clorox OR Fixed Business Vs. Alt Obits Guy OR Time

4.       Nantonian2013 OR  Maryportfuncity Vs. The Quim Reaper OR BuffaloPhil

5.       DDT Vs. Death Impends

6.       The Dead Cow Vs. Deadsox

7.       Charon Vs. Engineer

8.       Deathray Vs. The Mad Hatter OR Exu

9.       Gcreptile Vs. msc

10.   Joey Russ Vs.  Banana OR Great Uncle Bulgaria

11.   Sir Creep Vs. Spade Cooley OR Squonk

12.   Torva Messor OR The Old Crem Vs Dr T OR Markb4

13.   Master Tech OR Bibliogryphon Vs. Book

14.   Gooseberry Crumble OR John Key Vs. Heef

15.   Young Willz Vs.  JoeMoneypenny OR Pedro

16.   Wormfarmer OR The Old Lady Vs. The Unknown Man OR Boudicca

 

 

 

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I'll start preparing a squad.

 

Gives them a month's training to be fighting fit for their lives. ;)

 

Joe or Pedro? Interesting....

 

Edit: Just had a look at the other Round 2 ties. DDT v DI! gcreptile v msc! Dead Cow v Deadsox!

 

It's a prospective massacre for some big hitters....

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Goddamn I gotta face Spade right out the gate? And it gets HARDER as the game goes on?

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1 hour ago, YoungWillz said:

 

 

Edit: Just had a look at the other Round 2 ties. DDT v DI! gcreptile v msc! Dead Cow v Deadsox!

 

It's a prospective massacre for some big hitters...

 

Yeah I think it could have been actually ‘seeded’ like tennis, to avoid this.  Does our host really want those people being eliminated at the expense of some ‘whoever’s’ advancing just to hold sacrosanct the sanctimonious ‘random coin flip’?  It can’t possibly be that important.

SC’s two cents.

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