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Joey Russ

The 2020 Deathlist Cup

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I would like to thank msc for hosting the cup the past few years, he really did an excellent job. However, as he is now cohosting the DDP the task lies on someone else to host, and that's where I step in. Hopefully a long term host will be done in 2021, but for now, you're stuck with me. 

 

We're back in February, so, if the first round draw happens on the 20th January, this gives everyone 18 days to decide if they want to enter the Cup or not, and there's already several confirmations. In 2017, deadsox beat Spade, he beat DDT and he beat Death Impends to win the first ever Deathlist Cup. In 2018, Sir Creep got to the final in swashbuckling form, only to find wily old DDT too much. And in 2019, Spade Cooley proved why he is one of the GOATs, dominating every single match he was in like it was nothing. Bou made a nice run in the   cup too. Will Spade go two for two, or will another deadpool heavyweights fight back? Or will anyone win? Quim Reaper got to the Quarterfinals last year despite not really being a favorite to win by anybody - outlasted one DDP winner in the process. It's a Cup, skill is good but so is luck. Come one, come all, and look at the new rules...

 

Some Basic Rules which I've tried to explain as simply as possible, but which are open for questions about how obvious things I've forgotten work.
 
 
The Deathlist Cup
 
1.    This will be a knockout tournament featuring one on one matchups between Deathlist forum posters. These matches will be determined by use of a random draw, using Random.org.


2.    If we have an odd number of players ie 30 like in 2017, then certain players will get byes to the Second Round. This will be based on results from the 2019 Cup ie Winner first, then Runner up, semifinalists, etc etc.


3.    Players, on receiving their randomly drawn opponent, will have a ten day period to send the Referee their First Eleven for the match by PM, and one sub in case of an early death. These eleven picks can be very low hanging fruit if you so wish, as the point of the game is to score as many “goals” during the month a match is played.

 

ie, a perfect team would look like this

1. Alan Alda (joker)

2. Jeb Bush

3. George Bush Jr

4. Bill Clinton

5. Hilary Clinton

6. Barack Obama

7. Jimmy Carter

8. Walter Mondale

9. John Major

10. Tony Blair

11. Donald Trump

subs

12. Melania Trump

13. Dick Cheney

14. Sarah Palin

 

As an example. Though in reality, that team would be shit for actually scoring points...


4.    PROHIBITIONS – The following picks will be PROHIBITED ie NOT ALLOWED: death row prisoners, anyone who is a prisoner of ISIS or similar terrorist groups, people solely famous for being ill and nothing else, animals, no kids (that’s anyone under the age of 18), no one missing in action who blatantly died already.


5.    For clarification, my views on Famous for Being Ill are extremely lenient by forum standards. Is your pick an obscure in their own field type, like a historian from Trinidad? They’re fine. Is your pick someone who is in coma due to a heart attack, or a dad on his last Christmas, or the like, the type no one would have heard of for anything? Don’t pick them, there’s PLENTY of other better options. There’s enough Kate Bowler (published academic, cancer) types in the world that you don’t need Kate Cancer Mum of the Mirror Sob Story. Thank you.

My standards may be a little different from msc, but I will try to keep it as fair as possible. Don't expect the Laura Nutall's of the world to be accepted


6.    If in doubt, submit a pick, but the decision of the ref (me) is final and is not open to any court of appeal. If you think it’s a dodgy pick, it probably is. If you think the ref is a grumpy teenager, well, he is.


7.    Each match will take place over the course of a single month. For example, a February match would take place from February 1st to February 28th (or 29th on a leap year, such as this year), a March match from March 1st to March 31st and so on...


8.    Games will be scored in the following manner:

 

A person in your team dies = 3 points
A unique person in your team dies = 1 more point (ie 1 bonus point)
Fatality – Your joker. Double points
Someone famous only for being ill dies – 0 points because not in the team (hah, bet you thought I wasn’t paying attention here)


9.    Here is what happens in the case of a team member dying prematurely (ie on 28th Feb for the March game). If you discover this before the 3rd of the month, your top sub will automatically go into place. If it is discovered on the 3rd or after, sorry about your luck. If it turns out the person was dead and known to be (this is determined via a reference in a newspaper or magazine, not social media) then subs don’t come into play. This was a bone of contention in 2017, 2018, AND 2019 and I hope this clears that up. If it bloody well doesn’t I’m instituting a Hewlett Rule in 2021!


10.    At the end of the month, the player in the match with the highest score wins that game, and will advance to the next round. The player who doesn’t have the highest score will lose, and be eliminated.


11.    In the event of a draw, the following tiebreaks will be used:

1st tiebreak = number of hits
2nd tiebreak = average age of hits
3rd tiebreak = flip of a coin
4th tiebreak if needed = A little game of eenie meenie miny mo (hehe)


12.    A player is only held to one team for a single match. If they win their match and advance to the next round, they may pick eleven entirely different people for the next round. In this way, folk who announce their terminal illness in, say, May, can be put to good dead pooling use.


13.    Qualifying obits? Every single English language newspaper or magazine (ie Bleeding Cool for example) in the universe. Also Le Monde, Le Figaro, Der Spiegel, Die Zeit, El Pais and El Mundo. If you still can’t get a QO, well, really… The referee (Joey Russ) may make a judgement call based on what he is provided with, and that call will be final.  Forum posts on Deathlist, and your own blog don't count, sorry.

 

14. For the removal of any doubt, any players who do not send in their team before the deadline will be DQ'd and replaced by the highest scoring loser. No matter how many sad PMs you send afterwards. Apologies aren’t allowed either


Example
 
Death Impends, Joey Russ, YoungWillz and msc hypothetically take part.
 
Random.org gives us these matches:
1.    Death Impends v Joey Russ (feck)
2.    YoungWillz v msc
 
This draw takes place in Month 1 (ie January) and is for matches taking place in Month 2 (February). After the draw, each player sends The Referee (ie Joey Russ) a team of Eleven Celebrities they think will snuff it in Month 2.
 
Then, for the results:
 
msc scores in Month 2 with a big name celebrity and a unique but obscure punk music historian.
Young Willz gets a unique big name celebrity.
 
The score is 7-4 to msc, who advances to the next round.

 

 

 

Good luck!

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List of confirmed entries thus far: 

  1. Joey Russ - host
  2. Spade_Cooley - 2019 cup winner
  3. msc - former cup host
  4. Death Impends 
  5. Clorox Bleachman
  6. theoldlady
  7. Skinny kiltrunner
  8. CaptainChorizo
  9. JiroemonKimura
  10. Banana
  11. Wormfarmer
  12. The Quim Reaper
  13. Kinnock
  14. The Old Crem
  15. alt obits guy
  16. YoungWillz
  17. deadsox
  18. Bibliogryphon 
  19. gcreptile
  20. maryportfuncity
  21. grobler 
  22. DevonDeathTrip
  23. markb4
  24. the_engineer
  25. HDS
  26. Sir Creep
  27. Book
  28. YorkshireBanker
  29. Annami
  30. An Fear Bag
  31. Great Uncle Bulgaria
  32. LizLemon
  33. Grim Up North 
  34. Sean
  35. John Key
  36. Joemoneypenny
  37. Ethushispushingupdaisies
  38. The Unknown Man
  39. Torva Messor
  40. FixedBusiness 
  41. DeathByArsenic
  42. Djemba Djemba

 

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Yup, I'm in and looking forward to this, Joey, thanks.

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I'd like to try again,  hoping to get past round one this time.

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I am in,just hope Tom Long and the rest of my squad makes sure to stretch before kickoff.

 

 

 

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I'm in.

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In

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2 hours ago, Joey Russ said:

And in 2019, Spade Cooley proved why he is one of the GOATs, dominating every single match he was in like it was nothing.


I believe this needs to be reviewed for accuracy.  The Finals were quite close, what with the match being a Randy Romero death and obit away from potentially winning the Cup.

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52 minutes ago, Sir Creep said:


I believe this needs to be reviewed for accuracy.  The Finals were quite close, what with the match being a Randy Romero death and obit away from potentially winning the Cup. 
 

No doubt the finals were intense, but Bou still lost by 8 points in the end which isn’t a small margin.

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I am 0 and 2 for this game, but I feel I must participate.  The titans need their fodder to become titans, after all.  But I aim to do better.

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‘Course I’m in! There’s no way I’m settling for the Quarter Finals this time.

 

(you watch, I’ll get someone like DI and get fucked early doors now)

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6 hours ago, Joey Russ said:

And in 2019, Spade Cooley proved why he is one of the GOATs, dominating every single match he was in like it was nothing.

 

:reading-glasses:

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In as always, getting past the first round will be an achievement.....

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I'll give it another shot.  Who knows, I might catch lightning in a bottle again.

 

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I'm in

 

Almost as good as a bye for my opponent 

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I will make an attempt.

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Aye, count me in - unlikely to be troubled by running the Deathrace by February

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25 minutes ago, maryportfuncity said:

Aye, count me in - unlikely to be troubled by running the Deathrace by February

 

Never say never, ran the whole year once didn't it!

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2 hours ago, Kinnock said:

 

Never say never, ran the whole year once didn't it!

 

 

Yeah, but Banana's barrel scraping suggests it'll be a fast and furious affair this year. Over 1000 points on day two and having Googled some of the life support heroes in his talent pool I'd say he has more scores pending. 

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22 entrants in about, er, 14 hours. Already looking to be a great cup season...

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Can I play please?

I dont get out much these days....I need something special in my life....

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