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Dave to the Grave

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Posts posted by Dave to the Grave

  1. Posted

    If any fingers can be pointed regarding the cause of the banking crisis and the subsequent recession then they should point in Bill Clinton's direction, he it was who instructed American banks to lend to create more home-owners (a la Margaret Thatcher). However Gordon's reign as Chancellor has left our economy badly placed to weather the storm.

    And there was me thinking it was all to do with the desire of some countries to trade oil in euros rather than dollars.

  2. Posted

    LFN, a few presents from
    A bit old and grainy, but then aren't we all.

     

    Hoddle's a cunt. Anyway, everyone knows God is

    (official demonym).

     

    Oh, happy birthday LFN.

    Fair point. I'm all for polytheism.

     

    The fact they won so few England caps, and with the possible exception of Paul Gascoigne, make every England player since, look so ordinary, probably explains England's lack of success. Only in England would Bryan Robson have been chosen over Hoddle, and Le Tessier only played eight times. Still, happy birthday LFN.

  4. Posted

    I've been having a look into the wonderful world of Bough. Not strictly relevent, but he was on this

    . I assume he's the one at the end, summarising, 'that is the jumping on the eggs?'. Quiet pretty. I can only think it was one of his ideas. All those drugs and that.

  5. Posted

    ...........the lady and gentleman..........touching................forbidden..........turnips.

     

    As I rarely...........vegetables..........penis.........great hardship...........intercourse.

     

    May I be of further assistance?

    <_< You said intercourse.

    I think he means between courses.

    I think I know what he means. Next it will be 'your game m'lady' and 'your nuts m'lord'. Damned impudence, I'm telling you.

    I could of course be wrong, I have spent the entire evening mincing through Pimlico.

  6. Posted

    Although the lady and gentleman's concern is most touching I have never specifically been forbidden to associate with turnips.

     

    As I rarely have the necessity to convey vegetables of any genus in the course of my daily duties I should not consider it any great hardship were my employer to proscribe such intercourse.

     

    May I be of further assistance?

    <_< You said intercourse.

  7. Posted

    His daughter, Laura Smet, is in the news. Possible suicide risk.

     

    Well, as she already tried to kill herself, I would not call that a 'possible suicide risk'...

    This 'attempt' was hopefully unsuccessful, and a full recovery will be made. It is however, 'possible' that she will try again, hence, 'possible suicide risk'.

     

    As in, she has tried once, so there is a chance she will try again in the future. Possibly...

    • Like 1

  9. Posted

    Perhaps....

    'the official chaplain of the Donington Monsters of Rock festival and, over the years, provided much needed counsel and spiritual guidance to many frazzled fans of Saxon, Rainbow et al in their hours of The Darkness'.

  10. Posted

    Frank Bough, because my Grandad hated him. He used to throw a knotted handkerchief at the TV and shout 'Off Bough' whenever he was on. I think that should be the headline when he finally shuffles - 'Off Bough''. Sadly my Grandad didn't live to witness the sex scandal or to see him die.

     

    Also when DttG was a youngster a 'bough' was the passage of windies through the bottie parts.

     

    So Frank Bough and his sex sandals for me.

     

    Sex sandals? Wouldn't mind a pair of them...

     

    mmmm sex sandals

     

    spartacus03.jpg

    With just a hint of camel toe.

    It must be. The other chap appears to be wielding an ancient Roman sanitary device for ladies parts.

  12. Posted

    Okay, I agree, that's bollocks. The French can't rock. Nor can
    , by the way...

    Although they are usually quite familiar with the work of Monty Python.

     

    I thought that clip was great by the way. Wouldn't it have been even better if it had been sung in Dutch?

  13. Posted

    Yesterday I saw a group of men walking around with their hands in the air. Turned out it was the French practicing for World War III.....

    They were there the day before too, but perhaps you were part of the USA group practising arriving really late for World War III. Around the time of practising testing WMD on civilian targets and allocating reparations. This was the most popular option amongst the US groups.

    The practising starting your own war against teeny weeny countries and not doing so well, had a certain 'retro' feel that appealed to some, and would provide great material for some historically accurate films.

    The least popular choice however was the, practising having your hands in the air, pointing up to the sky at low flying aircraft. Rehearsing indignation and surprise in front of TV cameras, that what you do in a foreign land can actually have consequences in the USA, is particularly important.

     

    Getting off topic for a moment, whilst there will be some giving thanks that JH's tour is cancelled others may not. For those here is the man himself pretending to be a war hero. :evil2:

     

    My, my, Dave. It seems that my little jest really struck a nerve. I always wonder about such reactions. Is it because you think I might be serious? Or could it be because you suspect it's true? I've never pretended that the US is always correct in its foreign policy. But let's take a look at your swipes at us. Arriving late for WW II? So sorry that a lot of Americans had a strong desire not to get dragged into another of your periodic wars. Practicing against teeny weenie countries and not doing so well? Like you folks in Algeria or before our ill advised venture into Viet Nam? The last one is my favorite. I suppose all those civilians on 9/11 really deserved what they got, eh? I know some of our activities in the struggle against Islamo-Fascism were not what I support (like Iraq, e.g.) but when France has been so overrun by fundamentalist Halibuts that you have to grow a beard and your wife has to wear a burkha, we'll be sure to stay home.

    Right back at you big guy.

     

    Of course you could believe, that I believe, that you really saw the French practising for world war 3, in which case I apologise and I offer you a non-negotiable, twenty shekels for a beard, for my wife.

     

    Although, perhaps you believe you have the monopoly on making little jests, being free, being thankful etc etc etc.

  14. Posted

    Well, while SttG was logged on and refusing to vote, I, thinking there was only one vote, voted for Godot, on her behalf. Oh, how we laughed.

    After quiet reflection, I decided on those that made the DL truly original for me and went for SC, TF and SttG. The last one was obviously partly a political vote, but I've got to live with the woman.

  15. Posted

    Yesterday I saw a group of men walking around with their hands in the air. Turned out it was the French practicing for World War III.....

    They were there the day before too, but perhaps you were part of the USA group practising arriving really late for World War III. Around the time of practising testing WMD on civilian targets and allocating reparations. This was the most popular option amongst the US groups.

    The practising starting your own war against teeny weeny countries and not doing so well, had a certain 'retro' feel that appealed to some, and would provide great material for some historically accurate films.

    The least popular choice however was the, practising having your hands in the air, pointing up to the sky at low flying aircraft. Rehearsing indignation and surprise in front of TV cameras, that what you do in a foreign land can actually have consequences in the USA, is particularly important.

     

    Getting off topic for a moment, whilst there will be some giving thanks that JH's tour is cancelled others may not. For those here is the man himself pretending to be a war hero. :evil2:

    • Like 2

  19. Posted

     

    A little snippet here says Johnny Hallyday was also treated for colon cancer earlier this year.

     

    Oops sorry, I forgot to mention I saw that magazine (well the advert outside the newsagents) a few months ago. I tend to forget people are interested in death and health scares as well as squids, Portsmouth, grammar and bricks.

     

    http://www.parismatch.com/People-Match/Mus...-cancer-131217/

     

    There is also a Le Monde version but it is also in French and to read all you need to subscribe at a price which I guess is what we can expect for the English language press soon.

     

    He has been put into a coma. Colon, coma, perhaps next a fou-stop. And he's nearly Belgian.

    • Like 1

  22. Posted

    I would like racialist football "commentators" into Room 101.

     

    Some non-entity pillock (Effan Ekoku) is giving his expert opinion about the Clelsea v Liverpool game. Given his name, it comes as no surprise that he is gushing effusively about Chelsea's African players. The main commentator had to pull him up when he declared that Drogba is the "best striker in the world"

     

    Reminds me of that other simpleton THICKO....Ian Wright. He's SUCH a racialist that he can only discuss black players. If it wasn't for positive discrimination, that thick, mouthy lump of s'hit would never be anywhere in front of a camera. I was so glad when ITV Sport booted him out.

    You forgot to mention that he was a scum Gooner too.

    And despite that, he was also a very good player, who has done rather well for himself.

    Of course he had all the advantages of being black and born in south London. If it hadn't been for my blonde hair, blue eyes and university education holding me back, I might have been given more opportunities. :wub:

  25. Posted

    Actor James Dean died in a car crash today in 1955, aged just 24...

     

    James%20Dean.jpg

     

    And is it me or has Dean's iconic status just dimmed a bit in the last decade or so?

    I should imagine that most of the youth of today don't know who he is. And I didn't think he was that good anyway, a tad overrated.

    Perhaps the cigarette companies have simply found a new, 'face of smoking'.

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