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I see dead people

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Posts posted by I see dead people

  3. Posted

    I have to agree with josco

     

    The original 12 cartoons have to be taken in context. Most of them are just artist depictions of Prop. Muhammed just standing around. The virgin cartoon was supposed to be humour based on the preaching of clerics who stated that suicide bombers would each have 70 virgins.

     

    I agree that depicting all Halibuts as terrorists is wrong, and perhaps the turban shaped bomb was too far. But what a reaction, glad they didn’t publish the Bush does Hammed pic.

  4. Posted

    I have had a fair share of celeb encounters, but I don’t like to talk about it.

     

    But since you asked, one such celebrity and probably the most notorious and popular in the UK is Les Dennis B) , it was May 2004, location Washington pub , Belsize Park…..it was a warm evening and a group of us were successfully lubricated, after noticing Les Dennis almost on his lonesome, we ‘dragged’ Les into our drinking sesh. Anyway Les “bloody” Dennis (as we now called him) joined us afterwards at a friends house, (I shared a taxi with him – he paid). I got his mobile number as he said he would attend a party I was organising. I texted him the day before the party to remind him and he replied saying he would attend.

     

    He did not turn up, Les “Bloody” Dennis!

  7. Posted

    A Joke Thread is not complete without Tommy Cooperisms..........:).....although this might be distinctly British humour.

     

    1. Phone answering machine message - "...If you want to buy marijuana,

    press the hash key..."

     

    2. A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only Clingfilm for shorts.

    The shrink says, "Well, I can clearly see you're nuts."

     

    3. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't

    find any.

     

    4. I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 quid that he

    couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf. He said,"No, the steaks are

    too high."

     

    5. My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli. A strong currant pulled him

    in.

     

    6. A man came round in hospital after a serious accident. He shouted,

    "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!"

    The doctor replied, "I know you can't, I've cut your arms off".

     

    7. I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a muscle.

     

    8. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. They lit a fire in the

    craft, it sank, proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak

    & heat it.

     

    9. Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered

    with hundreds and thousands. Police say that he topped himself.

     

    10. Man goes to the doctor, with a strawberry growing out of his head.

    Doc says "I'll give you some cream to put on it."

     

    11. "Doc I can't stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home."

     

    "That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome. "

    "Is it common? "

    "It's not unusual."

     

    12. A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet. "My dog's cross-eyed, is

    there anything you can do for him? " "Well," says the vet, "let's have a

    look at him" So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks

    his teeth. Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put him down."

    "What? Because he's cross-eyed? "

    "No, because he's really heavy"

     

    13. Guy goes into the doctor's. "Doc, I've got a cricket ball stuck up

    my backside."

    "How's that?"

    "Don't you start."

     

    14. Two elephants walk off a cliff...boom, boom!

     

    15. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

     

    16. So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me "Can you

    give me a lift?" I said "Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster,

    go for it.'

     

    17. Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. There are 5

    people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my

    dad... Or my older brother Colin. Or my younger brother Ho-Cha-Chu...

    But I think it's Colin.

     

    18. Two fat blokes in a pub, one says to the other "Your round."

    The other one says "So are you, you fat bast**d!"

     

    19. Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid,

    the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one

    off.

     

    20. "You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today.

    They left a little note on the windscreen. It said, 'Parking Fine.' So

    that was nice."

     

    21. A man walked into the doctors, he said, "I've hurt my arm in several

    places" The doctor said, "Well don't go there any more"

     

    22. Ireland's worst air disaster occurred early this morning when a

    small two-seater Cessna plane crashed into a cemetery.

    Irish search and rescue workers have recovered 1826 bodies so far and

    expect that number to climb as digging continues into the night.

  8. Posted

    Aha, a real Marxist among us!

     

    av-716.jpg

     

    regards,

    Hein

    Thanks Hein,

     

    Maybe I am, either way I'd stay well clear of the Fidel Castro thread looks too militant for me.

     

    Last raging argument I read was that all Cubans wear rags, nothing to do with us Marxist Brothers :wub:

  11. Posted

    Guess what..im registered!

    Your week starts... now.

    Right! as an avid follower of the Bigsy thread, it seemed perfectly plausible that Iain had the power to put us and ronnie (do no wrong) out all our respective miseries.

     

    But his week is now up and again Ron has escaped. This time from the clutches of the reaper. I have to say I am disappointed this hit would give me an important lead coming into the last quarter of my local deadpool. ;)

     

    I await further prophecies/news with baited breath.

  12. Posted

    Certainly not Bin Laden; his whereabouts are unknown (and likely to remain so), so if he dies, we will probably not find out about it. There is even the possibility that he is already dead and it has been covered up.

    This poses the question, what would happen if Bin Laden was put onto the 2006 list and had in fact been dead for years. Surely you cannot claim that as a hit for the year? ;)

     

    This could also lead to influential people starting to hide bodies to ensure higher DL success in subsequent years.

    B)

  16. Posted

    For those people who would rather watch grass grow than cricket, don't worry you could still be of use in this time of need.

     

    If your grass is wet due to precipitation this could mean rain is heading to the Oval (thats South London for those not in the know).

     

    I would suggest we set up a rain report.

     

    I am next to St Pauls (thats central london - non Brits) and it is sunny with hardly a cloud in the sky. Damn. :(

     

     

     

    If there is no rain on the horizon I will be suggesting a coordinated rain dance

    :old::pop::banghead::eshock::D:grave:

    (which would look something like this)

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