The Pooka

I'm sort of with Godot here. The DL has a tendency to run eccentrics or attention-seekers out of town (Lady Clarissa Richmond, for example). Consequently, the list then becomes a bit dull. Banshee's English is hopeless, his thinking, at its best, is tangential and his put-downs are accessible only to himself. Yet his work has a compelling delusional grandeur. I always look for his contributions and will miss him if he opts to barricade himself into the redneck fortress of fantasy that is BS world. Am I alone?

That's nothing special, I can do that. Providing, of course, that the hair follicle is still attached to the head of the missing person.

Excellent.

The city is bright at night but eyes are dark I've tuned in to the signal of my imagination Motions and actions generate at their own speed Voices are heard but words have no meaning The film will project in only minutes My bottle is empty as I gently lay her to rest Time is precious and here comes a woman Down the sidewalk like gunfire of my wasted paradise Standing almost falling I felt it was impossible to speak For once I turned around and thought back door Looking over my shoulder I had a better view As I went off to that theater for the big picture Ladies and gentleman were taking their seats I'm to cheap for highly overpriced goods Life and death live and insanity and comedy laugh As I stair at the productions on the big screen An excellent effort Banshee's? There are many satisfying features but I am left wondering what 'the gunfire of' your 'wasted paradise' is. Am I right in seeing it as a post-coital reference. 'Standing almost falling' - perhaps a reference to your prick - becoming limp with performance anxiety. You have been gently laying her to rest (a considerate lover no doubt) ............. is that death and sex I'm picking up in the same image. Shakespeare often did this - cleverly - as 'death' and 'orgasm' were interchangeable terms in his day. (Yours in the ranks of death m'lady' is a line that frequently pulls the birds.) I think we should see some more of your work BS. Get to work, laddie, I think you have great promise.

Swear filters. I'm not much of a swearer. I wish we could have them in real life. I've got no idea what Lord Nelson typed, but it looks like it was probably rude. Spliff? ?? Stiff.

That looks suspiciously like the Union Flag painted on an Orangutan. Looks like Jimmy Osmond to me. i thought it was a commemorative plate. At last something from the Franklin Mint that looks real.

Same problems at the Uni where I work. There are all-singing and dancing databases that automate a lot of formerly manual processes and connect enrolment, WebCT access, library membership etc etc. Most of the time they are a great time-saver but if there's an error it proliferates. Ours recently kept putting some students for 07-8 back into the cycle for 06-07. When they look in the right place they don't exist. I expect that last year people were looking for you at the Politics seminars for the year ahead of you. This would be because you had been looped back in from the future. By the end of 06-7 academic year you would have been recorded as 0% and fail withdraw. Sorry Windsor you are already a drop-out. On the plus side some pretty nasty things may have happened to your future self that you didn't experience. Now back yer bags and go, laddie.

Enough with the jokes Banshee's ............. you're killing me!

Just when I lose faith in you Banshee's you come up with this. Like good modern art we are prompted to ask can anything be taken at face value. Its a joke because its styled as one. Yet its not a joke as its not funny. But by being so unfunny it has made me laugh. So its a joke ............ Sheer Genius BS. PS.. Knock knock Who's there Burt Burt who? Burt Lancaster.

I wonder if I should be using Firefox. It appears from what you respected people say that Internet Explorer is the electronic equivalent of white Y fronts. The Pooka don't do Y fronts. What must I do to get myself into some e-CK boxers ie Firefox? Wary though, my System Restore has been quiite puffed out recently.

But for a little bit of work I have little to do today. To keep me from the pub, I think I'll trawl through the 127 pages to see if there's an answer.

Good gracious......... I followed the link and there, alongside, was a Tony Blackburn story: 'Although I could be irritating at times,' (surely not) 'I never really thought that my wife was serious when she talked about leaving me. Then came the inevitable day of reckoning: on a Friday in October 1976, Tessa at last convinced me that she meant it. I was distraught. Opening myself a bottle of wine, I swallowed several Valium and sat down to watch Fawlty Towers. The idea was that I'd die laughing - though in truth I knew I hadn't taken enough tablets to cause myself any lasting harm. Tessa found me slumped on the sofa, slurring my words. Alarmed, she called the doctor, who came straight round and promptly packed me off to bed. The next morning, I turned up at Broadcasting House for what must rate as the strangest Radio One show I've ever presented in my life.' Tessa, of course, left him to run off with Richard O'Sullivan. The rest is history and can be followed in a thread near here.

O I make sense. In fact I'm very clear like crystals. It's to bad Louis Braille couldn't see that clear but we are all born with challenges! So Monoclinic drop your purse and grab your hips and listen and bring your attention right on the money because people in real life don't use this English or maybe I should just call it a language!! Alright it's just the name of the thread and I didn't lose any sleep over it. It's just unusual that's all. It's just not everyday. It's not very common. That's all. This is the clearest evidence yet that the linguistic legend Stanley Unwin is still with us. SN-word. Missed this one. Are you sitting cumftimould? Deep Joy......

It changes every day Elvis Perkins - While You were Sleeping The Decemberists- Sons and Daughters Showaddywaddy errr I mean Jimi Hendrix - Little Wing

Important questions. They must be answered. If I can make it, i need to get there early so that I can find a 'vantage point'. Now this is why The Pooka is facing charges. You say "vantage point" the rest of us say "Furtively hiding in a tree". That's better I may be prepared to venture down from the tree and into the pub to have a good look at you all. Needless to say I will be disguised (pointlessly, alas, as none of you know what I look like). For I am the Man of a Thousand Faces.

Important questions. They must be answered. If I can make it, i need to get there early so that I can find a 'vantage point'.

Me too. It may be fun to meet some of you loafers.

Well, I'd far rather give Drew a part these days than I would have then.

Indeed, and if my Aunty Beryl had a cock she'd be my Uncle Bob. Right, sort of like how Bill Clinton claimed in 'Rolling Stone' magazine back in 2000 'Pot should be 'decriminalized' My exact reply to him would be 'Only if you could have been in power for the passed eight years!' !!! Boy would he have been totally humiliated!!

Including Kevin Pietersen? Just kidding, doesn't everyone hate them? Especially Kevin 'FIGJAM' Pietersen. I was going to put him and his mercenary ilk (bloody ilks!!) in Room 101 but I'll content myself with a brief mention here... I HATE KEVIN PIETERSEN!!!! AND HIS ILK!!!!! That Graham Smith is another one. I f*****g HATE HIM!!! Why don't you do the decent thing Graham and fly into a hill like Hansie Cronje did? There's a good lad. Anyone like Matt Hayden? Born-again Christian too - just to add to the charm.

Finally signed in correctly. Too much lunchtime wine..... Pulphack!!! Good to see you back. If only I'd thought of a little progressive rock bait to lure you in. Caravan - another fine band (from Canterbury) I think. I'm within touching distance of a recently purchased pristine copy of 'Bumpers'. The sampler that got me into progressive in 1970. Clouds - sank without trace. Quintessence - where now? Ubi Dave Mason? Previous 3 similar posts deleted for tidyness [HCW]

Good god, that must have taken some effort to compose. Surely not as much, though, as it took to trawl through. There's several minutes of my life I'll never get back... I found it a fascinating and cogent insight into the lad's inner turmoil. Needless to say it was as incomprehensible as Banshee's usual posts - but then I haven't followed the history of this tiff too closely. Frankly, I will miss the tenacious fellow. Who will replace his bizarre non-sequiturs, arbitrary inferences and irrational mysticism? Not to mention his red-neck 'yankophilia'. Come back BS ....... I beg you.

An elegant and succinct put-down, Notapotato. Not a word is wasted. Banshee's Scream trying to unravel the secrets of the Universe must be akin to trying to run a Boeing 747 on a double A battery. Fortunately BS resigned from the list last night so I will get away with this remark.

You want a good proportion of the credit ... f**k you. You f****n asshole. Go get laid you little homo. Miserable little deuche bag. I mean seriously dude you are such a loser you make the losers feel like winners. You don't drink and you don't get laid and you go to college! He is a royalist and he wants to be a teacher. O my god Ahahahaa ah hahhhh ahhhhhh I can't stop laughing This is hilarious (Windsor from Scotland) ahh ha hahaha ahhh Ahhhhh ha hahahah ha ha Got to be the funniest thing I've ever heard Ahhhh ha ha ha ahhhh It really isn't that funny.

.... or get a job elsewhere. I believe that a certain Brinsworth House in Twickenham may be looking for someone with your range of talents. An insider would give a welcome boost to a couple of our threads. PS. Sorry to hear of your difficulties at work, Windsor. The place sounds like almost every institution in which I ever worked.