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Josco

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Posts posted by Josco

  2. Posted

    Speaking personally, I dislike the current Hallowe'en 'celebrations'. I find the whole idea of children, some quite elderly, banging on doors demanding sweets. And where is the pleasure in decorations that are dour and miserable; cobwebs, corpses and the like?

     

    Someone who dislikes Christmas is called a humbug, what is the Hallowe'en equivalent?

    • Like 1

  3. Posted

    The campaign to re-run the Referendum is well under way. If not actually orchestrated by Brussels then it is surely actively encouraged, as has happened in other EU countries; we have to vote again until we get it right.

     

    Incidentally, in a 'normal' election the ballot papers are retained for a period of time in case of recounts etc, is this the case with the referenda papers? As I am sure you are aware, your ballot paper can be traced back to you, a less benign government could well check how you voted.

     

    To save you the trouble, I voted out, as I did all those years ago. I am nothing if not consistent.

     

    "May you live in interesting times" A Chinese curse, I understand.

  4. Posted

     

     

     

    I know nothing about politics. So tonight I've looked at the Internet for some good, clear information about the pros and cons, what will ACTUALLY happen either way in terms of finances and changes to laws and human rights and immigration and all that, and how it will actually affect ME. And I can't find anything that explains it in thicko terms so I'm none the wiser.

    Old people will still die and need burying.

    As you were.

    I don't bury them. I lawfully deprive them of their liberty as per Articles 5 and 8 of the Human Rights Act, so it may affect my job. But I'm not too bothered about that. I want to know what each option will actually mean for ME. But I'm too upset about Bert Kwouk to think much about it right now
    Option 1. Sit on your backside with the rest of the "I can't work it out" crowd and do nothing. The people who want a say, go to the polls and there is about 70% support for vote leave. The EU secretly won't accept that and tell everyone the result was 53% win for remain. Most people believe the lie and life carries on as per usual. Except the Euro currency slides when Greece defaults and we send them £100 billion to prop-up the Euro to stop Spain, Italy and Portugal going into default as well. Greece is in the dog house for the next 50 years and getting a low priced holiday there is more easy to find. However because we are semi bankrupted too, we can only afford that holiday if you go and do a few dozen car boot sales. By the way you won't have to change currencies because we too will be using the euro by the year 2025 (at the latest).

     

    Option 2. Go and vote leave. The turn out will be high and about 75% of the vote will go to Leave. The EU secretly won't accept that and tell everyone the result was 53% win for remain. Most people don't believe the lie, a few riots are started then and life carries on as per usual after two days of unrest. The Euro currency slides when Greece defaults and we send them £100 billion to prop-up the Euro to stop Spain, Italy and Portugal going into default as well. Greece is in the dog house for the next 50 years and getting a low priced holiday there is more easy to find. However because we are semi bankrupted too, we can only afford that holiday if you go and do a few dozen car boot sales. By the way you won't have to change currencies because we too will be using the euro by the year 2025 (at the latest).

     

    Option 3. For some strange reason you go to the polling station and think about kittens and soft cuddly toys. The birds are singing and the sun shining. You think what the hell, it's not so bad, I'll vote remain. Too many other people do this too, and the Remain In vote receives 45% support. The EU secretly won't accept that and tell everyone the result was 53% win for remain. Most people believe the lie and life carries on as per usual. Except the Euro currency slides when Greece defaults and we send them £100 billion to prop-up the Euro to stop Spain, Italy and Portugal going into default as well. Greece is in the dog house for the next 50 years and getting a low priced holiday there is more easy to find. However because we are semi bankrupted too, we can only afford that holiday if you go and do a few dozen car boot sales. By the way you won't have to change currencies because we too will be using the euro by the year 2025 (at the latest).

     

    Easy

     

    P.S. Then when you go to the polling station take a permanent black marker felt tip pen with you. Remember to vote leave, it's the bottom box. Don't use the stubby pencil, "they" have pencil erasers. On the sly, photograph your marked ballot paper with your smart phone, then fold it and place it in the ballot box.

     

    Oh, and watch this short (3 minute 20 seconds) film now.

     

     

    Rotten

     

    That link has now gone to all my friends, I'm sure they will both enjoy it.

     

    I also like your cynical thinking, 53% sounds just right; I believe that when the remain vote wins then the EU will respond to insist that we are IN, fully and unconditionally, Euro and all.

     

    I voted out the first time round, I shall do so again, but they'll still ignore me.

    • Like 1

  6. Posted

    Typhoid Harry's second link is now invalid, but the first one, from the BBC, is interesting for two reasons; The BBC's original website coding and also that I haven't had faggots for ages.

     

    I thought the original topic, the so called language barrier with our American cousins, had some merit but has withered on the vine. However with the inexorable rise of the 'Trump' I feel it could be interesting to discuss it once more.

     

    Or am I just trumping in the wind?

  7. Posted

     

    I think he might have finally finally given up.

    He'll probably start again tomorrow though, you know like a moth never gets bored of pinging against a lightbulb no matter how many times it burns.

    Given up what? Smoking?

    An absolutely shite thread created by somebody who is much disliked by all that have had the misfortune to be on the end of his cuntishness.

    What part of 'Fuck off you massive cunt because everybody hates you' do you not actually understand then?

    Fucking hell, your parents think you are a fucktard and now everybody else on here thinks you are a fucktard.

    Do the fucking sums you helmet, you are a w***er, you ponce through life generally fucking off everybody you come into contact with and are so utterly thick skinned you keep ploughing head first onwards thinking that people actually really read the crap you post. We skim through it fella, we cant be arsed anymore, not even capital letters and kewl spellinz of words makes a blind bit of difference.

    You carry on posting and we will carry on hating you, you have the warmth of a dead slug and the wit of a sad young man who still lives at home with his mummy coz the world is all against you.

    The rest of us will enjoy this forum you will just need it.

    You do make some of us laugh but, sadly, its for all the wrong reasons.

    You are one of lifes losers, you can write whatever floats your boat about me but it will never change the fact that I am so much better than you, everybody is better than you actually.

    You sad twat.

     

     

    Wow, I've been away a while. Seems like it's all kicked off.

    Might go and hide again.

    • Like 2

  11. Posted

     

     

    48, 49 in September

     

    Me too!

     

    ...and female, working on a divorce, mother to four awesome children. In good lighting I can pass for about 34. I lurked on this site for about a decade, signed up in 2013 and only started posting recently.

     

     

    In good lighting? You must look ravishing in the dark then.

     

    And in welders goggles you could pass for Brigitte Bardot.

    Who?

    • Like 1

  13. Posted

     

     

    With all the fawning jingoistic shite about the 50th anniversary of Churchill's death myself and the Voice of Young Maryport were speculating what would happen if this dirt-digging about political paedos finally got to some doddery old git just before he died and was given hard evidence of Winston being a kiddie-fiddler.

     

    I stress I have no reason to believe he was but...

     

     

    In that situation, do we rethink our great national hero or rethink our revulsion to paedos?

     

    Just, innocently, putting the thought out there, like.

     

    That's so edgy..... in 1975! Did you ever think anniversaries like this might be the first time some people have heard of the fucker.

     

    Given the average outlook/intelligence of the Mirror/Sun reader these days, I'm sure this list of 10 things you didn't know about Churchill could just as easily be

    1. Who he was
    2. When he lived
    3. Why anyone even remembers him

    etc.

     

    Although it all pales in comparison to this piece of demented chav hilarity (which also proves how badly Mirror wants to be a left-wing equivalent of MailOnline.)

     

     

    Don't youngsters get taught arithmetic any more?

  19. Posted

    A good friend of mine lent me "The Cruel Sea" by Nicholas Monsarrat around 10-11 years ago.

    I started it, but never got around to finishing. Nearly every time I saw him in the pub he would mention it, and I would apologise, say I'd not read it yet and offer it back. He would insist that I keep it till I'd finished as it was a good read.

    He died last year, his widow said I could keep it as it is what he would have wanted; I still haven't finished it!

    I had a look through this comment I made...2006?... surely not. I thought the other day about the aforementioned chap that lent me the book and as I recollected he had died about three years ago. It was a shock to realise that it was eight years. Tempus fugit.

  21. Posted

    Sunday Times has an interview with this 33 year old musician (sic) who was much discussed in these esteemed pages as a possible DL entry. Seems to have cleaned up his act, but then again Leopards and spots etc.

  22. Posted

    Little bit of a work place whinge here... I am going to be off sick for 10 days after next Thursday 26th, (a small op on my right hand, thank you for asking) but the company has decided to make me redundant during this time. Mrs Josco v. upset, and I can't help wondering if I'll ever work again.

  24. Posted

    ...... Another thing - middle class very definitely didn't mean better as James Cameron pointed out when he showed all the Irish having a great time down in third class on Titanic - until it sunk and they all died. There's a lot to be said for the working class. It needs to be revived.

     

    I don't think it's the class divisions that needs reviving, it's having a good time whichever class you're in. People are generally far too miserable these days, alcohol has become the new demon (they've got rid of smoking almost); beer in my local has gone up to 3 guineas a pint. Holy shit! It was 2/6 (about 12p) when I first started going to a pub.....

  25. Posted

    An elderly golfer comes in after a good round of golf at the new course and heads straight to the bar/restaurant area of the club house.

     

    As he passes through the swinging doors, he spots a sign hanging over the bar that reads:

     

    COLD BEER: $5.00

    HAMBURGER: $10.00

    CHEESEBURGER: $15.50

    CHICKEN SANDWICH : $18.50

    HAND JOB: $250.00

     

    Checking his wallet to be sure he has the necessary money, the old golfer walks up to the bar and beckons to the exceptionally attractive female bartender who is serving drinks to a couple of sun-wrinkled golfers.

     

    She glides down behind the bar to the old golfer.

     

    “Yes?” she inquires with a wide, knowing smile. “May I help you Sir?”

     

    The old golfer leans over the bar and whispers, “I was wondering young lady, are you the one who gives the hand-jobs around here?”

     

    She looks into his wrinkled eyes and with a wide smile purrs, “Yes Sir, I sure am.”

     

    The old golfer leans in even closer and into her left ear says softly,

     

    “Well then, be sure to wash your hands real good, because I want a cheeseburger.”

    • Like 2
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