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Monoclinic

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Posts posted by Monoclinic

  1. Posted

    Knew you lot would give me the heads up without having to trawl google, or back to page 5, to back up my hypothesis.

    We might be haemorrhaging talent (in the loosest sense of the word) in 2016, yet Simon Cowell's still here to fill the voids. As is Anthea Turner. And some say we live in a fair and just society....

  7. Posted

    I finally bought a new laptop today to replace the one which died on me a couple of months back.

     

    Anyway - it all seems to be working fine, but for one reason or another it won't let me watch youtube videos. All I get is a blank black rectangle where the video should be. I'm sure there will probably be a really obvious solution, but I'm rubbish with computers.

     

    Any ideas on how to fix this?

     

    You may have forgotten to enable your porn plugin or download adobe flashplayer or summat.

  8. Posted

    Do us all a favour and die today you evil old bint, whilst the world has it's attention focused on OBL. We've already had all media outlets crammed full of royal shit over the weekend, so it'd be good to bury your passing in a sea of CNN reports from Pakistan.

  9. Posted

    Are we sure he didn't just top himself as he, like Blair, wasn't invited to his family friends' big do last Friday?

     

     

    In fact it is a shame they didn't pull it off on Friday, that would have dispersed the media circus and given a bit more viewing choice.

  10. Posted

    Today at lunch I learned that somebody put up a big screen with live footage of the wedding on it in the office cafeteria. As you may expect, there was no lack of wibbling idiotsspectators.

     

    I don't get it. This office is located in Holland, FFS.

     

    And that's not the end of it. Tomorrow is Koninginnedag, the day the Dutch celebrate their head of state's birthday. It's actually quite nice, as long as you avoid the official bits, but I suppose the idiots will be wibbling no end.

     

    Shoot the lot, come the revolution.

    Hein

     

    After realising the only news to be had this morning (in English, French, Dutch, Italian or Turkish) was being transmitted live from Fuckwitingham Palace I decided to head into work only to find the secretary already had live streaming from RTBF on the go, as did someone in my office as they were awaiting Kate. It wasn't even 10 am! I kindly informed them she wasn't turning up until 12 (CET) in the hope people would stop going on about it. FAIL. By the way the verdict from the secretary... Kate's dress "boff", sister "beaucoup plus belle".

  13. Posted

    Dame Lizzie went today-maybe another Dame-Maggie Thatcher- will be next.Everything happens in 3s as they say!

     

    Maggie's not a Dame...she is a Baroness.

     

    My vote goes to Mintoff.

     

     

    She's neither, she's a cunting witch.

  15. Posted

    . I didn't really know where to put this. I thought I was a hard assed bastard but I found this upsetting, the hopelessness of it all. Nobody wants these poor sods so they risk everything for some kind of life, then die like this exposed and filmed like body porn. I wanted to look away but couldn't, just thought about their final hours and what had brought them to this. My French isn't great but it sounds as if they were coming through Niger to Libya as a transit to Europe.

     

    I think the commentary is Italian but the title is in French, which seems to suggest they were expelled from Libya and left to die in the desert. The fact that there could be that many bodies in such a small area makes me wonder if they hadn't been dumped there by one of the Maghreban countries. Either way, whether they had been expelled or were in fact on their way to Italy, it left me completely numb, especially those who appeared to have had their eyes pecked out. However crap you think your life may be it is images and stories like this that make you realise how lucky you are in this world.

  16. Posted

    revolution ayayayayayyayayayayayyayayeeeee....... Can't wait until East Turkmenstanies freak out! Fuck Communism. They screwed up this country long enough.

     

     

    This is 2011, not 1989...

     

    Perhaps do a little google before you play the smartarse card :wheelchair:

     

    I'd not hesitate to say 1989 passed Turkmenistan by...

     

    Well, I had no idea Turkmenistan was in North Africa and whose regime had been propped up by oil and US patronage....

     

    Yes, it's tucked between Yemen, Bahrain and if rumour has it parts of China.

  18. Posted

    HRH making a first state visit in living memory to Eire. Begging the question, how many hard-line republicans are there out there with longer memories than her. Oh yeah, and Philip is going along too.

     

    Considering the IRA blew up the Duke's uncle, I'm sure that the couple have not forgotten the troubles.

     

    Do hardline republicans pose a threat? No. They were only able to kill Mountbatten because he was on a private holiday with very little security. Killing a 79 year old tourist on a boating holiday? Anybody could have done that...

     

    The BBC tells me that Queenie has only 3 countries to which she has never made a state visit. Ireland and Israel I get but Greece? Are the in-laws that bad?

  22. Posted

    I have seen what to me seems like a tremendous amount of films with Ben Stiller in them, which leads me to the conclusion that Ben Stiller is unfortunately in every film and thus it is not worth watching every film. For this reason I have never seen Star Wars, The Godfather, Fightclub, Goodfellas, The Matrix (though I do have the DVD), Avatar, Batman films, Titanic. I could go on. I have however seen Bambi, can't remember the plot, don't they all die?

     

    I make a point of watching British films, films that make you cry, films that make you laugh and Bienvenue chez les Ch'tis, in case you were worried I was one of those hippy nazis that don't let their children watch TV.

  23. Posted

     

    Someone needs to slap his stepson around, what a fucking prick

     

    Someone needs to slap you around.

     

    Bert Trautmann endorses this statement.

     

    Jeez there are some real arseholes out there, in addition to abuse of the elderly do you endorse wife-beating and paedophilia too?

     

    Bert does not endorse the abuse of the elderly, Bert does not endorse wife-beating, Bert definitely does not endorse paedophilia, Bert endorses the slapping of JR976evil.

     

    Monoclinic endorses Bert Trautmann and the views of Bert Trautmann.

  24. Posted

    Lynden David Hall died less than eight years after winning "Best Newcomer" at the MOBOs. Has anyone else died sooner after picking up a newcomer gong at a major awards ceremony?

     

    The most recent winner of the best newcomer at the Grammy's to be dead is yr man from Milli Vanilli, who won it in 1990 then carked it just over eight years later.

     

    Nirvana won best international newcomer at the Brit awards the year before Kurt decided to take a bullet in the head.

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