Amanda

I'm going to be getting a couple of rescue Lurchers soon! I had one until Christmas who had to be put to sleep and I miss everything about him, because he was the kindest, most attractive, amusing and best dog I've ever had. I have a habit of visiting gypsies and buying their dogs from them because I feel sorry for them (dogs not gypsies), but am going to do it via a rescue centre this time. Am v.excited about it!!

Are we on about the choking bit, or the in hand bit or what? Bloody Central Networks are digging up outside my house today. They're still at it now, but fortunately I have power. It's bloody annoying though because this house is pretty old, so the 1st floor is quite low and when they're frollicking about on their digger things they are just about level with me, should I be in bed. And I like to sleep with my curtains open because natural light wakes me up better than alarms etc. When I asked them how long they were planning on being there and making such a noise and a mess etc, they said "How long is a piece of string"! Grrr, I hate it when people say that. You'd think, seeing as they are clearly specialists in the field of electric stuff that they might have a clue what they're doing and therefore give me an approx. amount of time it might take. Or a time bracket - e.g. 1-2 hours, 3-6 hours, 1-2 weeks etc. They replied "between 1 hour - 1 day". I think that's unacceptable! When I asked what the problem was, they didn't even know. And I when I said that I hoped for all our sakes it wouldn't be a long night, one of them said he didn't mean because he was on triple time!! That's no incentive to get the job done is it?! But saying that, if it was summer and they were doing the electrics with shorts and fluorescent vests then I wouldn't mind so much because they're all under the age of 30.

I know this isn't really relevant to anything on here, but please please somebody remind me should I happen to visit here tomorrow to get my car tax. I just noticed it whilst staring out the window waiting for computer to work. It was due on the 28th Feb so I'm pushing it a bit. Thank you.

You lucky thing. My local petting zoo consisted of a hampster, a guinea pig and a couple of bunnies. And the hampster bit me and I had to have a tetanus injection. V.painful experience all round. The great thing about hampsters is they take a silent "p". Bugger it. Why did I think they had a P in them? Horrible creatures anyway, P or otherwise. And Badgers. Can't stand them. Think we should hunt those also.

Ah ha. Well they're not in my dictionary! What fab words though! And you answered my next question and to how you know these words. What is the study of words called - Lexio-something? Or letho-something? Or what?

You lucky thing. My local petting zoo consisted of a hampster, a guinea pig and a couple of bunnies. And the hampster bit me and I had to have a tetanus injection. V.painful experience all round.

I found it all hard to follow. In fact it had me stumped. ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

Let it be said that Sir Josco and his little helper are good for something after all. Sir Josco! Wow, in the the same exalted company as little Billy Gates. My little man is enjoying a midlife expergefaction. If Amanda has sufficient (but not too much) champagne we may even deosculate. Dear Sir Josco, Expergefaction Desculate Are these made up words? I actually consulted my Oxford Compact Dictionary and they are not listed!

It's all in the name of chariddeeeeeeeee! I had loads of fun doing it! And got the local town crier to cry out for people to dig deep and put their cash in my pouch (or my "deep pouch" as he put it). The best bit was the tail. It was about 4 foot long and really bouncy and swishy - kind of like a pony tail, plus the weight of it really improved my posture by pulling my upper body back and stopped me slouching. Ahhh, they were the days!

I'm an Executioner?????!!!!!! *runs round the room jumping and making whooping noises, then comes to senses and makes way to fridge for bagels & ginger ale. Notices Inar has kindly left some chocolate cake & pink champagne* Thanks everyone!! And thanks to Mr Josco's Little Man! That's the best title I've ever had! I didn't even realise I've typed so much. And I don't think I've even posted anything vaguely relevant to this forum! Hooray hurrah! I'm made up! *choking back lump in throat* Just need to get the avatar sorted now, but it's in hand!

Hmmm, did contemplate it, but I can't really have two topics with my name can I? It'd be greedy. And I do still really really love Mr Josco's little man!

Why yes as a matter of fact I do!! I'll dig it out and get somebody to scan it or something and then that can be my avatar!!!! Yay-hey! Good thinking!!

Hello (I'm whispering everybody 'cause I feel bad) .... I'm still really sorry about my bad taste jokes. I went out tonight and I felt bad for the whole night and didn't even enjoy my meal very much (and it was really nice) ...... I'm sorry, I really am. I do give money to charity though. And I rescue dogs (4 so far). And I dressed up as a kangaroo for a whole weekend once to raise money for a local children's centre. Sorry Sorry Sorry sorrysorry orrysorrys rrysorryso rysorrysor ysorrysorr sorrysorry

Inar!!!!! I LOVE that Miss Amanda thing! Maybe it's down the lovely wine consumed, but made my head funny seeing that in text!!!!!!!!! Maybe we should change the title of this to "I LOVE Being Called Miss Amanda"....!

The mods have the power and wield it justly. The admins have even more power, but succumbed to the dark side a long time time ago. So watch out (and don't use the report button whatever you do). God I seem to have lost 14 years in age and now feel 10 and therefore I really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really want to press the report button!!!!! Must click report button So what does a mod do? Are they not the people who used to ride on those cool looking mopeds? And what do the admins do? Can these people get rid of your posts if they so desire? Obviously they can add stuff, but can they amend posts for spelling purposes and to remove swear words etc? And were I to press the report button (accidentally of course!!!) who would my report go to - admin or a mod? What about if I tested the report button on one of my own posts? Thank you. I am going to log out now so that I can't be tempted by the Report button.

Thank you Notapotato! That's just what I would like to say, only I'm not articulate enough to do so. I loved that ref to Linda's veg meals!! I'm very sorry that I offended ... I really didn't mean too, I just found them funny. I don't know any amputees as it happens and maybe had I have done then I wouldn't have made the jokes. Sometimes I just have to laugh at things, otherwise I'd cry. Sometimes I find things too sad to comprehend - e.g. the Tsunami thing etc, and stupid rubbish jokes make things easier to deal with and while I don't find anything of a tragic nature amusing, it eases the pain that I feel from other's pain and misfortune. (If you know what I mean.) And I thought it would be acceptable to make jokes of that nature on this forum, but I was wrong. Please accept my apologies - I in no way whatsoever wanted to offend anybody and I am upset that I have done so.

I'm sorry everybody, I didn't realise I could do that. And when I made my other posts it wasn't snowing. Snow stopped anyway after 10 mins, but did give us a nice covering temporarily. Lucky you Inar for having snow on Christmas Eve, though I'd imagine that even I'd get a bit bored with snow for that length of time. I didn't realise that somebody could become executioner, but it's rather a good title isn't it? Am going to have a play with the iMac and make it better. The pictures I could see previously were really good until I got this accelarator thing, but the computer was really slow. Now it's a lot quicker but pictures are rubbish, but I suppose you choose your battles.... I hope everybody had a nice day today anyway. Nothing remarkable happened to me, not that it ever does. Car started for the first time ever though, so that's got to be worth mentioning. Noticed that Jordan didn't win the Eurovision song contest thing ... I'm sure she's a lovely person, but I just think her plastic surgery makes her look vile. And it can't be good for somebody to be dancing and getting nerves etc when they're pregnant. Anyway, I will say no more on this thread for tonight unless it's in response to what somebody has said after I've posted this. Bye and have a nice weekend!

Oh yes, I've just noticed that! I quite like it when they do that and put little comments under what people have written....

Ooooh, I rather like that! Feel like a member of the aristocracy! (hope I spelled that correctly?)

Just quickly wanted to share this because I'm v.excited!!!!!! It's snowing here!!! Really heavily and it's actually sticking! We've had rubbish snow here on and off for the last couple of weeks, but this is proper sticking thick fluffy snow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I might be able to build a snowman in the morning!! Hooray hurrah!!!!!!! Goodnight!!!!! (although I'm too bloody excited to sleep now!!!!)

Brilliant!!!! I didn't know someone had the power to do that!!!

I am very sorry IYG or Inar, I will call you Mr no more!

Actually Honez, I checked out some of Eileen's rants .... really don't know what to say about that!

Alright alright alright! It's difficult with my computer - it's a crappy old iMac and it's just rubbish and I've got this accelerator thing on it that speeds it up but the pictures come out bad so I can't see them very well. And I don't know what to have as avatar. And someone very kindly sent me some possible pictures to my Hotmail account, but when I try to open them Hotmail boots me out and demands my password over and over and over again, and I don't have another email address in which to forward them too. If I gave someone my password would they be able to do it for me? Pleeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaassssssseeeeeeeeee? *fluttering eyelashes* - what is this meant to be?? - and this actually. - and what about this one? Is he blowing bubbles? Isn't that Michael Jackson's job?

Absolutely Mr IYG... I could give you many examples, but I won't. So many people aren't fit to be on the road. Sometimes I think that if I wasn't so aware of what was happening that I'd have been killed in my car ages ago, because NOBODY ELSE SEEMS TO PAY ANY ATTENTION TO WHAT'S HAPPENING ON THE ROADS. My life still ongoing seems to be down to the fact that I keep avoid annoying people on the road side of the road/jumping lights/swerving into my lane etc etc etc..... GRRRRRRRRRRR.