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Gunjaman5000

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Posts posted by Gunjaman5000

  2. Posted

    Apparently poor old Ronnie wasn't in the best of health during his second term as president.

     

    Ron Reagan believes his father would have left office before his second term ended in 1989 had the disease been diagnosed then.

    "I've seen no evidence that my father (or anyone else) was aware of his medical condition while he was in office."

     

    You don't say. I've seen Scooby Doo episodes with bigger surprises than that.

  4. Posted

    What are the prerequisites for a crap poem? Does it have to be cloyingly sentimental or are boringness and bad technique enough? Perhaps it's time we laid down some rules?

    I think Windsors second attempt;

    Bite ma shite.
    fits the criteria best so far in that it features crap as a subject.

     

    Although I'm not sure how well a thread featuring poo poetry would go down. Surely there's already considerable acreages of the internet devoted to that sort of thing?

  9. Posted

    Seeing poor old Gary dropped down dead of a brain haemorrhage and being a curious chap myself, I had a quick look on Wiki to see how this brain haemorrhage carry-on works:

     

    A cerebral haemorrhage (or intracerebral haemorrhage, ICH), is a subtype of intracranial haemorrhage that occurs within the brain tissue itself. Intracerebral haemorrhage can be caused by brain trauma, or it can occur spontaneously in hemorrhagic stroke. Non-traumatic intracerebral haemorrhage is a spontaneous bleeding into the brain tissue.

     

    It seems he was killed by a Diff'rent Stroke after all. The curse continues...

  10. Posted

    A little while back. Some of us fought a protracted campaign to get rid of the damnable swear filter just so that honorable members could vent their spleen occasionally. The above is an entertaining example of just what can be achieved although I must say SC I was a little disappointed with your metaphor: "in the snow of your tired mind".

     

    I didn't think it quite did it, unlike William Gibson's first line from his cyberpunk novel, Neuromancer that could be amended slightly: "The addled mind of Maryport was the color of television, tuned to a dead channel." To compare a mind with a dead TV channel is not original but I would argue that the snow of TV static is a better representation of amorphous thinking than the stuff that falls in winter, not that I have any views, one way or the other about the workings of MPFC's mind or SC's mind except to say that they both strike me as two rather splendid chaps who would enjoy a beer together. I support SC's war on the banal but would humbly suggest that there are one or two more fitting targets hereabouts. Nonetheless there's nothing like an occasional venomous post to wake up these slumbering threads. Congratulations on a sterling effort. Any thoughts Honez?

    Godot me old china, I'll have to disagree with you here. The "damnable swear filter" I found to be a part of the sight's charm. The way I see it, the place is tactless rather than tasteless; small differences perhaps, but of the latter the interweb has many, and the former there are few. There's plenty of other places to vent one's spleen (and keep it relatively clean) occasionally, an off topic post in the Patrick Moore thread should give you the opportunity to clean out some cobwebs, should the need arise.

     

    I must say too, that I'm a little disappointed with your analysis of Star Crossed's metaphor which you found a little disappointing. It's like being marked down for plagarism and marked down still further for not plagarising well enough.

     

    That's a bit of a mixed message to be sending the poor boy isn't it?

  11. Posted

    This truly is the day the music died.

    Spade man, I thought it died with your good self and your dicky ticker the day they sprung you from the joint to sing for the masses.

    Another classic case of postal diarrhoea from mpfc, burying S Cooley's genuinely amusing post (which, given some decent moderation, should have triggered the locking of this pointless thread) with more banal, pointless rubbish. You really are the scourge of this forum, mpfc. I'm surprised anyone bothers posting at all these days, knowing that you'll be along in an instant to drown out the programme with your perpetual static noise.

    What makes your ubiquitous, narcissistic dross even more annoying is that you are, in real life, allegedly fairly intelligent and not the ignorant fucking moron you play "around these parts, like". A first-class cunt of the highest order, all you do is jealously hide the finer details of this forum in the snow of your tired mind. Which is a shame; I like snow.

     

    I have a hunch Glasto will survive as will Dublin's finest, doubtless to headline 2011 to ecstatic cheers from most of the same people who go every year.

    Really? You reckon Glasto will survive this? Next you'll be revealing your insight as to the Sun's potential rise in the east tomorrow morning*. The only thing I like about you is that you are older than me in real life and I have a very, very good chance of outliving you. Especially if, as I hope, you contract a painful and aggressive form of a rare and incurable disease as soon as possible.

     

    *Although, if the Sun doesn't rise in the east tomorrow, it'll probably be a hit on the NDP for Vaagheid, who seems to have almost every base covered.

    When did the swear filter start allowing fuck*? That's the real issue here.

     

    *Cunt, of course gets an honourable mention.

  13. Posted

    Or the mother did it :closedeyes:

     

    Brittany's mother, Sharon Murphy, discovered Monjack's body last night. She is also the one who found her daughter, Brittany, unconscious and on the floor of the bathroom five months earlier.

    Any half decent copper ought to be asking Mrs Murphy a question or two methinks.

  17. Posted

    This turned up in my junk mail folder today.

     

    ------------------------------

     

    FROM:Mrs Rose Mongo

    TELL: +27 73 782 4367

    105 SANDTON AVENUE

    SOUTH AFRICA.

     

     

     

    HIGHLY CONFIDENTIAL AND URGENT BUSINESS ASSISTANCE

    PLEASE

     

     

    _________________________________________________

     

     

    ATTN: SIR / MADAM,

     

    I am Mrs.ROSE MONGO, wife of late MICHEAL MONGO who was murdered by the Zimbabwean veterans and irrate black people.Before the death of my husband on the 29th of Oct 2003, he was a Properous Tobacco and Coffee farmer in Zimbabwe and one of the major sponsor/ Financier of the opposition party - Movement For Democratic Change(MDC)in Zimbabwe. He was also the former president of Farmers Co-operative Trade Union in Zimbabwe.

     

    I am writing you from SOUTH AFRICA. I got your contact email address through the south africa International Information Exchange Centre and decided to write you. I write to solicit for your special assistance to a family shattered by a tyrannical government led by the dictator President ROBERT MUGABE and his(ZANU-PF) ruling party.

     

    I am probably of the convinction that you are aware of the present situation in my country Zimbabwe sequel to the land and farm land crisis in Zimbabwe, the government secretly sponsored the war veterans and some irrate party members to disposes the land being occupied by whites and some rich farmers who are opposed to his consistent stay in power and his radical and unnecessary reforms targeted at his political opponents.

     

    This action has led to the killing of some members of the opposition party including my husband(MICHEAL MONGO),who did not support this ill-fated action. But before the death of my husband and the consistent threats to his life, he anticipated some dangers and so he smuggled out the sum of US$25.m(TWENTY FIVE Million United States Dollars), to south africa since it is the nearest neighbouring country and deposited it in a security company with the intention of using it for the purchase of New farm machinery and chemicals for Agricultural purposes in South Africa as well as a purchase of some hectares of land in SWAZILAND.

     

    On the 29th Oct, 2003, the war veterans and some supporters of (ZANU-PF) ruling party trooped into our compound and axed him(my husband) to death.

    Since then, they have been terrorizing my only son, MICHEAL (JR) but I succeeded to work for his escape to a neighbouring country, SOUTH AFRICA as a political asylum seeker (refugee). But his position in south africa does not permit him to open an account or normalise this fund for any meaningful business transaction in south africa since He does not have a south african Identity Card. That is why I want this fund to be transferred into your Norminated account so that you will assist him to invest it in your country.

     

    Hence,if you agree to assist us, we have two options for you, we have agreed to go into partnership with you and your family or in the alternatve, we offer you 20%of the money for your assistance, 5% will be for the possible expenses incurred in the process of this transaction, while 75%will be for our family investment in your country,through your assistance.

     

    I want you to understand that this fund is purely a family fund/ money and not drug money, nor could it be classified as government fund or Money Laundering affairs and it could be substanciated by relevant authorties by our attorney.

     

    It is Family fund but termed confidential because I do not want my son to be traced to where he is presently. If you are interested in assisting us, kindly contact my son or myself with this email address,and the telephone number above.

     

    Right now, I am presently in south africa with MICHEAL(JR) my son and the whole of my family sequel to the tensed political situation and the fear for our lives in Zimbabwe. I need your urgent and confidential response.

     

    PLEASE READ ABOUT THE PROBLEMS IN ZIMBABWE FROM THE LINKS BELOW.

     

    www1.zimbabwesituation.com

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/918781.stm

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/715001.stm

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/1063785.stm

     

    Thanks. Best regards

     

    Mrs:ROSE MONGO

     

     

    (For the Family)

     

    --------------------------------

     

    I score it ten for originality, ten for the "killed by irate black people" part (brilliant, you don't often hear that in news reports smuggled out of the country), but zero for attempting to take advantage of those with a social conscience who aren't particularly bright.

     

    Luckily I don't have a social conscience.

  23. Posted

    I pulled out some old CDs last night looking for some music, and stumbled across Nick Cave's Murder Ballads. I can't believe I didn't think of this before for this thread. It should be on every Deathlister's playlist.

     

    My faves are Henry Lee, featuring PJ Harvey and Where the Wild Roses Grow, featuring everyone's favourite murder-by-the-river-victim Kylie.

    I meant to post that the other day but ran out of time before I had to get to the airport. Great album, Stagger Lee gets my vote. Dark, camp, disturbing - everything a good Nick Cave track should be.

     

    Now completely off topic, I found this while looking for the Murder Ballads track. Hadn't heard it in years. Brilliant.

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