honez

Probably. You have nothing to fear if you have done nothing wrong. Incorrect use of the word from in your post suggests that you might like to put the kettle on, because you may be having some men in trenchcoats turn up soon. Welcome to DL, DtW.

Pizza Hut's pizzas, emblazoned with the phrase "hot pizza always tastes better!" It begs the question; better than what? Dog turd? Curried eel?

"Robin sweetie, where is my bat-bra?"

Imagine how she felt. Lukewarm tripe? Has anyone we know been to Canberra recently?

And don't forget a small glimmer of hope for downward-bound Wrexham, beating our 'Arry's Chester 2-0.

Can you calculate the postage to Australia for me before I make a bid? Air mail please, because I'd like it to arrive before Easter.

I suppose it's too late to point out that should read honez, not Honez...

I love the quality of the posters on that article. They remind me of someone else hereabouts.

She'd have a one. Although it'd only be a little one. (I can't get past reading you post in a Belushi Blues Brothers' voice.)

Get yourself a personal helicopter. Or your could go and buy a doovde instead.

I bought my wife a bag and matching belt for Valentine's Day. Now she can fix the damn hoover.

Probability suggests "posts like this."

What part of his food was he?

Anyone that mixes six different kind of prescription drugs, with at least two of them being pain killers, one vallium and another sleeping tablet, doesn't die of an accidental overdose. They die of stupidity. If he hadn't bred yet it would have been the perfect example of the Darwin Awards at work.

Good God man have you caught le pouffe dramatique or something? What you are suggesting is an abomination! Offal products are compulsory for religious festivals and the like. Give up white chocolate or truffles or marshmallows or something, but for god's sake, don't give up the sacred trinity of meat, gravy and pastry; bound together in the holy foil chalice.

\insert bashing joke here.

Don't argue with your ex. (I hope the ex in question isn't DL's own Amanda.)

Why did the Geordie want to marry a Panda? Because no-one would see the black eyes. (and he could shag a Panda)

I think you should stay behind after school.

He was also in Mel Gibson's The Patriot, Ned Kelly, Casanova, Candy & I'm Not There.

or perhaps... ? I'm surprised the Police haven't caught him yet, because his phone number is on the picture the bloke is holding. Move over Columbo and Inspector Morse.

But Honez, every time I offer my "No thanks, not today," it usually transforms into a 'knuckle exposing pound' It's like people can't 'digest' the fact that you don't want to touch the hand they didn't wash this morning. Okay, try something else like, "No thanks, I'm gay/straight*." Give them a smile, then add, "I'm sure you understand." Be sure to leave your hands in your pockets or clasped behind your back at all times. * depending on whether you bowl from the pavilion end or not.

I'm definitely giving up handshakes again this year after a roaring success last time. It really made some people uneasy in work when I ignored their proffered hand. Sometimes you have to offer a piss-poor excuse for the hardcore sales types. Usually a polite "No thanks, not today," bamboozles them enough to withdraw the offer.

Great research there Redmega: Her real name is in the first sentence of the article; "Canada’s punk rocker Beth Torbert aka “Bif Naked”. I find that reading articles before posting links to them is usually the best approach. Just a thought. PS Appalling spelling on that site BTW. If they can't spell "you're" then I suspect the quality of journalistic information is going to be a little thin also.

For the same reason some wimmin insist on being allowed membership of a gentleman's evening club and the like -- To annoy everyone else and frustrate themselves when it turns out it's not all it was cracked up to be. The boys do it because they have a genuine need, and the others, well, they're just bitches.