Anubis the Jackal

Aaannnd... relax. Oh look, a cute fluffy kitten!

Anyone else see the 'Dispatches' doc last night on rising food prices. As well as environmental factors (floods, droughts etc.) a lot of the blame was laid at the door of commodities speculators artificially bumping up the price of basic foodstuffs in order to increase profits, and of course bio-fuel planting wiping out much of the potential grain capacity. Very disturbing.

Wanking Walrus...for a second there I thought you meant

Who was famously the reason for an onfield fight between Glenn McGrath and Ramnaresh Sarwan

I'd definitely watch Psychomania, Mary. Possibly the best-behaved zombie bikers you could ever imagine. Considering it was shot after Altamont, they do liitle more than rev their bikes rather loudly near old ladies.

As chance would have it, I once spent a very drunken night going through the full Chitty-Chitty-Bang-Bang songbook with Mr Staples.

Anyone up for a punt on who's going to be the first to try it and make an utter twuttle of themselves? I'd say Brendan McCullum.

Explorer is a golden/ blonde ale, very light and perfect for summer. Not too pokey at about 4%, so good for a cheeky lunchtimer. Happily for me, I'm off to the home of Broadside and Explorer for a few days, so I'll have a few for you.

Could I please ask all Deathlisters to club together and buy me one of these. Favourite beer of the moment, Adnams Explorer.

Dick Van Dyke perhaps?

Somehow, I don't see her as the delicate fainting type... Jane Austen Smack and Smackability

Reminds me of the joke... A doctor tells the man in his surgery that he has less than a year to live. " I suggest giving up alcohol, sex and smoking." says the doctor. " Will I live longer then, Doctor?" asks the man. " No, it'll just seem like it."

Man Walks Into A Pub and Three Sheets to the Wind both by Pete Brown. Two fine books that attempt to address one of the great questions of life. Why is beer so bloody great?

It's possibly an early death for Kevin Pietersen's righty-lefty slog.

How dare you, Mary. For 'Hushabye Mountain' they can be forgiven anything.

The entire DJK Lowan second team have been suspended for a year after allegedly rigging a match against Rheinkassell-Langel which enabled them to gain promotion. The score? A rather spectacular 54-1. I particularly like the fact that they scored, as if to prove that they really were trying.

Just the type of guy to take military advice from. "What do you think of the situation on the southern flank, Dead Body Killer?" "Well, it's a bit dicey. They're still holding the high ground and seem to be holding fast, even though they're all technically dead. I'd advise a full airstrike on the cemetery to be followed up by a slow advance to shoot all the corpses that remain. You can't be too careful with these dead johnnies."

My mate was due to have his Stag weekend in Vienna to watch the European Championship. He had to change it because the Austrians really do lock up their daughters.

I think the word you're looking for is 'fluffer.'

Just so reminiscent of Henry V at Agincourt, Richard I in The Holy Land, Elizabeth I and her 'heart of a king, and of a king of England' Gawd save the Queen!