Heef

Could be time for an update given how much 'action' this pool has seen since the last one.

Once saw Ken Dodd do a show at the Brentwood Centre. I think his opening gag was to suggest that if anyone had paid for parking of less than 3 hours was in for trouble. He'd locked the doors and had dangerous dogs patrolling the perimeter and no one could escape until he was done. I think he did a four hour shift (though my memory could be playing tricks) the Diddymen were always creepy little bastards though.

Reds are unique (4 pointers), bolds are joint picks and strikethroughs have left the field of play. So, as things stand, DI now needs two hits to go past me as I don't think there's any unique picks there. However, I'm really not sure what my team's prospects are from here. Vervoort and Anzaki are irrelevant. Carroll is possibly the worst pick in the round - she's fighting fit and able. I kind of get the feeling that Reid is in the same bucket. Not a chance. Stefansson and Bracknell are definitely ill, but I'd say okay for the foreseeable future. Nash has been in hospice care for 2 years. Hard to know where he stands. Verhousky was a late ring-in, and I think - given his health issues - he'll be around for a while yet. As for DI's team, I deliberately didn't pick Jose as I don't think he's as ill as thought. Mind you, he is ill, so could happen. Not sure if there's anything to suggest Wouk is more likely to go in March than any other month in the last few years. Da-Ren and Vento look more likely than any of my remaining picks, but I think Moss will last the month. Still, not even at the half time mark. There's all to play for, and I get the feeling DI will be looking to hit hard on the counter.

To paraphrase Jimmy Greaves (I think), [The Deathlist Cup] its a funny old game.

https://www.google.co.nz/amp/ottawacitizen.com/news/local-news/obituary-former-golf-pro-leaves-lifes-course-on-his-own-terms/amp Warren Grant died Monday 5th March.

Cool. 4th hit with Bignone as well.

The nominations of Northampton and Kettering seem unduly harsh. Had a few nights out in Northampton and never feared for your safety or sanity in quite the same way as places like Romford, Dalston or a number of other dead end towns. I mean, at least in Northampton there's something to do... Not so Cannock. I am intrigued by the concept of a town curfew. As I mentioned earlier, I experienced a curfew in Basildon. Seems like it wasn't a unique experience. Why and how does a town decide to implement a curfew? Well, the 'why' might be obvious with some of these places.

Haha. I didn't think that team would make any hits- QO or not. on a related topic, how does the theme team league look at the moment?

If you don't know who Trini Lopez is, you're a little bit of a philestine. Next you'll be telling me that Jona Lewie is a nobody.

And I see the new Tasmanian government want to relax gun ownership laws. You'd almost think Port Arthur happened in a different state. Pillocks.

The eligibility criteria is what keeps me interested in the Cup. msc ftw.

Well, off the mark but irrelevant for my tie. Had Goodwin in my DDP line up I think.

The time I was there was probably about 20 years ago; back when the Eastgate world of better shopping was something supposedly impressive. Reminded me that a friend had an altercation with a sachet of ketchup in a Wimpy in Basildon and spattered it all over the walls. Improved the decor no end!

Tabloid speculation of impending death is fine, yet internet speculation is some nefarious deed undertaken by sociopaths. I suggest your strongly worded letter (preferably checked for spelling and grammar corrections in advance) is amended to include the Daily Mail and other newspapers who actively encourage have-a-go-heroes to take out respected members of the judiciary, rather than people who speculate about potential events that they have no hand in influencing. And yes, I must confess to some envy of Wojciech Jaruzelski. I would love to be able to sport tinted spectacles with the panache that he did. Plus, I'd love my own secret police (I'd be much better at deadpooling if I had a team of people dedicate to the task on my behalf). Also, I do enjoy a good borscht. Mmmmm. Borscht.

Speaking of Basildon, it's the only place I've been in the world where I've turned up to see what's going on in the town centre to find some kind of curfew going on. Most bizarre wandering around a town centre in the UK at 7pm at night and literally no one being around. No idea what was going on. Decided to have a night out at some kind of social club in Pitsea instead and passed an evening having a few yarns with some people celebrating a 60th Wedding Anniversary who were surprisingly cogent and didn't once say 'Oi, oi, saveloy', which was a refreshing change to my previous experiences of Southern Essex (yes, I'm looking at you Romford).

Adding to the towns of iniquity, I was once dragged to a party in a Social Hall in Cannock as a mate of mine thought he was in luck with a woman going to this party. It turned out the average age of the attendees was around about 16 (I think I was around 23 at the time) and it was like walking into a village of the damned. Only this village was populated by 16-year-olds with a baby in tow, ears being stretched by the largest pair of Argos hoop 'gold' earrings you're ever likely to see and demanding that you go and buy them some ciggies and White Lightning from the corner shop where they've already been banned for stealing coffee whitener. Fucking hell, never have I been happier to leave a party before getting a drink in. My mate was persona non grata for at least a month after that little excursion. When I drove back home, I made him slum it in the boot.

Verhousky was a last minute addition. I was keen on Bjorn Formosa. He didn't meet the required threshold though. I don't think Verhousky will obit, even if he dies. Suffering from COPD.

Honourable mention to the Coventry ring road though. Shittiest, most dangerous bit of road I've ever seen. Exits are so close together that those leaving at the next are merging with the traffic joining from the last. Plus the local scallies loved taking air rifle shots from the overbridges.

Death Impends (Hannigan, Vervoort, Jose, Goodwin, Anzaki, Da-Ren, Kennedy E, Martin D, Wouk, Vento, DeKoven) Vs Heef (Stefansson, Vervoort, Goodwin, Hannigan, Carroll B, Grant W, Reid JR, Bracknell, Anzaki, Nash D, Verhousky) Hmmm. 7 vs. 7. I do hate it when 3 quarters of my back four ends up playing in the opposition defensive line as well. Good look with Hannigan in goal though. Terrible with goal kicks.

This thread reminds me of one of my favourite forum topics. Shittest towns of the United Kingdom. When I lived over there, in order to see as much of the country as possible, the missus and I would undertake regular road trips. This involved randomly selecting some town on the map of the UK and then planning a route to that town avoiding all motorways and being obliged to stop in any town that the route went through. As such, a trip to Abergavenny included such places as Daventry, Rugby, Redditch, Evesham, Pershore, Worcester, Hereford, Ross-on-Wye and Monmouth. Oh, what delights could we find in such evocative places as Stevenage or Braintree. As I recall, we even waded into a curfew in some concrete shit-hole called Basildon. Anyway, I came to the conclusion that Portsmouth was the shittest of shitholes. Vast amounts of concrete. Yep. People that looked as if the only way is Kappa. Yep. A deep foreboding that someone's going to stab you for looking vaguely lost. Yep. A deep seated hatred of the next town for no obvious reason. Yep. The only selling point of the town being something not into the town (Go to Portsmouth they said. Visit the shopping centre at GunWharf Quays they said. Well, if your only selling point is a shopping centre not in the centre, then you're out of home - c.f. Braintree, Clacton). Getting lost in an industrial area in Widnes/St. Helens was reasonably close, but I still think Portsmouth was worse.

I can remember having a completely pointless argument with a sport-obsessed friend about the semantics of whether Jason Robinson was a shit rugby player or not. All hinging on the word shit and whether anyone could really technically be described as such. I fear that the argument lasted at least an hour. You know it's gone on too long when the onlookers, originally entertained or intrigued by such a bloody stupid debate move on for fear of being used as argument-fodder, "What do you reckon, Dave? Can any player, let alone one that played international rugby really be described as shit?" "LEAVE ME OUT OF IT" exclaims Dave running into the night, hurtling into the oncoming traffic of the nearby arterial route just to avoid becoming an active participant. Oh, happy day.

St. Albans has a very pleasant waffle house in the vague proximity of the Cathedral. That's all I know. Just down the road from Cockfosters

You've got this one, DI.

Must end up pretty confused in his logical Möbius loop.

Three decent sized hits since the last update. Has to have changed the leaderboard substantially.