TQR

I see Johnson’s million pound plane makeover is nearly done:

Couple of musical old-timers today: Ray Davies, 76 Joey Kramer, 70

Tits, just 1 away from scoring Sunday: 49

So you're after a load of moans about names on the official DL? I wish I had as much time on my hands as you to read through such impertinent bilge. Not saying I'm not happy having a moan, of course.

Hope he makes it. Which, given that he defied all odds by surviving his horrific de-legging in ‘01, he’s clearly strong enough to. Doesn’t sound great, though.

Lewis Hamilton's British Bulldog Coco has died of a heart attack, aged 6.

Saturday - 102

No, not really; it's just being reviewed. Martin Offiah has spoken about this, saying he welcomes the review but it shouldn't be banned.

Bob Seely, Conservative MP for the Isle of Wight, performed very well on Jeremy Vine earlier when discussing the UK’s (failed) track and trace app. Seely: We have built a world-leading app. Vine: What about the German app? Seely: I don’t know about other countries.

Nope! Holm’s brown bread. Just when you think nothing more can be expelled, the enema proves it’s efficacy once again.

I’ll punt for Luis Echeverria this time, cheers drol.

For the first time since 1963, UK debt is over 100% of GDP. This was always going to hurt a bit, but that’s a pretty grim figure nonetheless. But we’ll be okay, we’re Brexiting soon.

Ulitzer mate, please accept my most profound apologies

@Leon Brittan Watch your blood pressure love.

That disgusting genital wart is the last person we should be wishing a happy birthday.

Just caught up with the Sky One comedy drama Brassic. If you haven't, I urge you to look it up and watch it. Sometimes it's powerful, sometimes it's properly funny and at all times it's extremely well written.

Friday: 140

Delia Smith, 79

Dagnabbit, fucked if I can remember the names of Gone With The Wind characters so assumed it was just some other sod I hadn’t heard of. As you were

Alan Sugar has weighed in on continuing lockdown restrictions in the UK: Hugely insightful. Everyone he knows is alive. Hands up if you’re dead, everyone. Fucking pranny.

An alternative is to put your list in your signature in spoiler tags? Saves space for everyone and it’s always there for reference.

What number is she on the list? I’ll give Smith a break this time and pick Spinks. Also, make the votes visible.

Colin Kaepernick took the knee before a game of American football a few years back as a silent protest to the extrajudicial murder of unarmed black Americans. He was punished for doing so.

Jesus Christ. Breathtaking ignorance. But then I’m not majorly surprised - this is the same twat who didn’t realise we were cut off from France by a sea.