TQR

Hello again! Welcome to edition number 13 of Kill or Save! Unlucky for some? Just the ones who can’t stand newer music. We’re going great guns in our quest to rifle through everything that has found itself the top end of the UK singles charts, and we’ve just expanded our mission! Having completed the No.1s and No.2s from the 1960s through to the 2000s, we’re both moving on to No.3s (with host @wannamaker) AND going back and covering the two decades we’ve until this point ignored: the 1950s and the 2010s. This game right here? The No.1 hits of the 2010s. Fancy reliving all the action? See below for links to all Kill or Save games to date: 60s No.1s; 70s No.1s; 80s No.1s; 90s No.1s; 00s No.1s; 10s No.1s (you are here) (IN PLAY!) 60s No.2s; 70s No.2s; 80s No.2s; 90s No.2s; 00s No. 2s 70s No.3s; 80s No.3s (IN PLAY!) Christmas Special 2023 KoS HoF The Rolling Stones — Paint It, Black Donna Summer — I Feel Love Nena — 99 Red Balloons Madonna — Vogue Gorillaz — Dare The Pogues ft. Kirsty MacColl — Fairytale Of New York Barry Ryan — Eloise Queen — Somebody To Love A-Ha — Take On Me The Cardigans — Lovefool Sophie Ellis-Bextor — Murder On The Dancefloor David Bowie — Life On Mars? So, the 2010s. So recent, and yet so…not. The X Factor was a thing back then and now isn’t (thank fuck). Corona was still only either a beer or a eurodance group from the 90s. TikTok was just a Ke$ha song. Threads were just clothes. AI was just a big bloke in the pub who sat there every day from 10:30am. And the music…the music was…yeah…better than the charts would suggest, I’d say. Never mind. We’ve got a lot of killing to do. This’ll be a fun and wholly cathartic exercise. Yeah Yeah, Rules Schmules: Each song starts with 20 points (whether it deserves it or not). You can vote once a day. Since we all live in different parts of the world with all sorts of different timezones, please add a date at the top of your votes to avoid any confusion (e.g. 6/5/24, Mon 6 May, etc.). Each day you may add up to 4 points to and subtract 6 points from any songs in the current round. You can split your points between as many songs as you like. You must use all six minus points unless it's a round-ending turn, and you must give at least one plus point. Placeholder posts are allowed, but if you don't edit your votes within 5 minutes, then the next person can go and do their votes. Consecutive votes are not allowed. Before voting, please listen to the songs of each round and vote according to your own opinions, don't vote for songs because they're high/low on the board or because of your opinions about the artist, only the song matters. Make sure you copy and paste the most recent voter's scoreboard when you take your turn to score. For your own ease, ‘paste as plain text’ to get rid of the previous poster’s formatting. Then, delete their +/- scores, add yours, adjust the song’s points total and make your scores bold. As an example: 24 List Topper — Diego’s Nightmare +4 20 Didn’t Listen — Dump Me Later 20 The Ignored — Nobody Knows Me 19 Deckchair Shufflers — Faffing About -1 16 Drivel — Dreck 15 Bottom Of The Pile — Diego’s Favourite -5 And once again, from the heart of my bottom, thanks so much to our careful and attentive players who spot and correct any errors that arise (we're only human, after all). The game runs sweet as a nut thanks to you. See, below, the complete list of 244 UK No.1 songs from the 2010s. Lord have mercy on your earholes. And if you’ve been affected by any issues raised by this, the Samaritans are always there at the end of the phone for you. Call free on 116 123. As usual, we’ll go through 5 group stages, beginning with the No.1 hits of 2010/11, followed by a grand final consisting of the 25 songs that have qualified, where we will ultimately decide what the undisputed best chart topper of the 2010s is, and the artist(s) of said song can and will enjoy a TikTok revival and at least a few more minutes of being relevant. 2010/11: 65 songs - the last 6 songs will make the final 2012/13: 65 songs - the last 6 songs will make the final 2014/15: 61 songs - the last 6 songs will make the final 2016/17: 24 songs - the last 3 songs will make the final 2018/19: 29 songs - the last 4 songs will make the final So gang, oil up and get your extra-large, ultra-realistic, double-ended scythes at the ready, for it’s time…to Kill or Save.

Sat 27 Jul 33 Lewis Capaldi — Someone You Loved 32 Calvin Harris & Dua Lipa — One Kiss 30 Lil Nas X — Old Town Road 30 Lady Gaga & Bradley Cooper — Shallow 28 Jess Glynne — I’ll Be There 26 Benny Blanco, Halsey & Khalid — Eastside 26 Ariana Grande — Thank U, Next 24 Demi Lovato ft. Clean Bandit — Solo +4 24 Ed Sheeran ft. Khalid — Beautiful People 24 Stormzy — Vossi Bop 24 Shawn Mendes & Camila Cabello — Señorita 22 Ava Max — Sweet But Psycho 22 Calvin Harris & Sam Smith — Promises 20 Drake — In My Feelings 20 Dave ft. Fredo — Funky Friday 20 Ariana Grande — 7 Rings 20 Ariana Grande — Break Up With Your Girlfriend, I’m Bored 20 Ed Sheeran ft. Stormzy — Take Me Back To London 18 Baddiel, Skinner & The Lightning Seeds — Three Lions 16 Drake — Nice For What 14 Rudimental ft. Jess Glynne, Macklemore & Dan Caplen — These Days 11 Drake — God’s Plan 08 Eminem ft. Ed Sheeran — River 08 Ed Sheeran & Justin Bieber — I Don’t Care 0 George Ezra — Shot -6 That was a pleasure.

Sat 27 Jul 42 Bronski Beat — Smalltown Boy 38 Cyndi Lauper - Time After Time 35 Giorgio Moroder & Philip Oakey - Together in Electric Dreams 35 Kate Bush - Running Up That Hill 34 Nik Kershaw - The Riddle  34 Queen - I Want to Break Free 33 Ultravox - Dancing with Tears in My Eyes 31 Tina Turner - What’s Love Got to Do With It 30 Tina Turner - We Don’t Need Another Hero (Thunderdome) +4 26 Madonna - Like a Virgin 22 Baltimora— Tarzan Boy 21 Stevie Wonder - Part-Time Lover  20 Bananarama - Robert De Niro’s Waiting  17 The Commodores - Nightshift  16 Elton John - Nikita  14 Dee C. Lee - See the Day  14 U2 - Pride (In The Name of Love) -6 13 Thompson Twins - Doctor! Doctor! 12 Madonna - Material Girl 09 Colonel Abrams - Trapped

A like not at all for your musical tastes, but for your excellent commitment to the cause. Bravo, sir.

En Passant started the conversation, then fucked off!

Fri 26 Jun 34 Calvin Harris & Dua Lipa — One Kiss 28 Lil Nas X — Old Town Road 26 Lady Gaga & Bradley Cooper — Shallow 25 Lewis Capaldi — Someone You Loved 24 Demi Lovato ft. Clean Bandit — Solo +2 24 Benny Blanco, Halsey & Khalid — Eastside +2 24 Jess Glynne — I’ll Be There 24 Stormzy — Vossi Bop 24 Ariana Grande — Thank U, Next 22 Baddiel, Skinner & The Lightning Seeds — Three Lions 22 Shawn Mendes & Camila Cabello — Senorita 20 Rudimental ft. Jess Glynne, Macklemore & Dan Caplen — These Days 20 Drake — In My Feelings 20 Calvin Harris & Sam Smith — Promises 20 Dave ft. Fredo — Funky Friday 20 Ava Max — Sweet But Psycho 20 Ariana Grande — 7 Rings 20 Ariana Grande — Break Up With Your Girlfriend, I’m Bored 20 Ed Sheeran ft. Khalid — Beautiful People 20 Ed Sheeran ft. Stormzy — Take Me Back To London 17 Lil Dicky ft. Chris Brown — Freaky Friday 17 Drake — God’s Plan 16 Drake — Nice For What 14 Eminem ft. Ed Sheeran — River 14 Ed Sheeran & Justin Bieber — I Don’t Care  11 George Ezra — Shotgun -6

Fri 26 Jul 34 Cyndi Lauper - Time After Time 34 Bronski Beat — Smalltown Boy 32 Nik Kershaw - The Riddle 32 Queen - I Want to Break Free 31 Kate Bush - Running Up That Hill 30 Ultravox - Dancing with Tears in My Eyes 29 Giorgio Moroder & Philip Oakey - Together in Electric Dreams 26 Tina Turner - What’s Love Got to Do With It 26 Tina Turner - We Don’t Need Another Hero (Thunderdome) 26 Madonna - Like a Virgin 25 Baltimora— Tarzan Boy 22 Colonel Abrams - Trapped +4 21 Stevie Wonder - Part-Time Lover 20 The Commodores - Nightshift 20 Dee C. Lee - See the Day 20 U2 - Pride (In The Name of Love) -6 19 Bananarama - Robert De Niro’s Waiting 19 Elton John - Nikita 17 Thompson Twins - Doctor! Doctor! 16 Madonna - Material Girl 14 Spandau Ballet - Only When You Leave 09 Bronski Beat & Marc Almond - I Feel Love (Medley) 06 Ashford & Simpson - Solid Not that my scoring means anything. Cornetto will just undo it.

One of the best vox pop contributions ever. Elsewhere, I hope the Boris Johnson "filthy piece of toerag" lady is still going strong.

We got new rules, I count 'em.

I’d be happy with this; I don’t think giving out fewer plus points detracts from the game much, it’s just the mark of a poor round which happens from time to time! I like the idea of having to give at least one plus point, just to keep the list shuffling in both directions. Oh, and thanks

It has always kind of been a rule to use all of the +4 and -6 you are given, though the rules as Book, Wannamaker and I have written them have just said "every day you can give +4 and -6...". None of us have said 'must'. The main thing that matters is that the scores are a net negative, otherwise the game may not move. Might be an idea, for fairness, to keep the net negative of -2; so a choice of +0/-2, +1/-3, +2/-4, +3/-5, +4/-6. Voting for the least worst isn't that difficult, even if it's only out of the ones you know. It's preferable that players familiarise themselves with them all but tbh, if you don't know them, that indicates lack of cultural impact, which is arguably grounds to ignore/remove them anyway. But, contrary to popular belief, I'm not a dictator, so I'll allow not using the whole allocation if that's what everyone wants to do. Let me know what you think, everyone.

Fucking hell I'm gonna have to give people two votes a day at this rate.

Tbh I'm not sure I blame you and GUB for skipping this round. It's an awful set. I know all of them, only 4 of them are worthy of points IMO and one of those (Vossi Bop) is mostly because of the line "I could never die, I'm Chuck Norris, Fuck the government and Fuck Boris".

Speaking of Tom Tugend...

Comes down to his own complete arrogance and lack of self-awareness, combined with the Tory talent pool now being the last moisture droplets of an evaporating muddy puddle.

And there's Honest Bob running for leader too.

Righto, that'll do. On we go. Last qualifier before the final! 29 down to 4. 2018-19 Thu 25 Jul 21 Calvin Harris & Dua Lipa — One Kiss +1 21 Demi Lovato ft. Clean Bandit — Solo +1 21 Benny Blanco, Halsey & Khalid — Eastside +1 21 Stormzy — Vossi Bop +1 20 Eminem ft. Ed Sheeran — River 20 Drake — God’s Plan 20 Rudimental ft. Jess Glynne, Macklemore & Dan Caplen — These Days 20 Lil Dicky ft. Chris Brown — Freaky Friday 20 Drake — Nice For What 20 Jess Glynne — I’ll Be There 20 Baddiel, Skinner & The Lightning Seeds — Three Lions 20 Drake — In My Feelings 20 Calvin Harris & Sam Smith — Promises 20 Dave ft. Fredo — Funky Friday 20 Lady Gaga & Bradley Cooper — Shallow 20 Ariana Grande — Thank U, Next 20 Ladbaby — We Built This City 20 Ava Max — Sweet But Psycho 20 Ariana Grande — 7 Rings 20 Ariana Grande — Break Up With Your Girlfriend, I'm Bored 20 Lewis Capaldi — Someone You Loved 20 Lil Nas X — Old Town Road 20 Ed Sheeran & Justin Bieber — I Don't Care 20 Shawn Mendes & Camila Cabello — Senorita 20 Ed Sheeran ft. Khalid — Beautiful People 20 Ed Sheeran ft. Stormzy — Take Me Back To London 20 Tones And I — Dance Monkey 20 Ladbaby — I Love Sausage Rolls 14 George Ezra — Shotgun -6 I've never seen such a pile of shit in all my life. I've managed to give 1 point to every song in this round I like. The rest, absolute jizz. Shotgun, in my honest opinion, is the worst song of the decade, and yes I even include LadCunty in that.

Pfffft yeah alright then, just end the fucking round and get a new batch in. Ideally before I sod off to bed.

Thu 25 Jul 92 Harry Styles — Sign Of The Times 61 Clean Bandit ft. Zara Larsson — Symphony -6 41 Camila Cabello ft. Young Thug — Havana 30 Dua Lipa — New Rules +4 Please for my birthday may I have that shite song by Zara Lardon thrown in the bin thank you

The Day TQR Officially Survived The 27 Club 32 Bronski Beat - Smalltown Boy 29 Kate Bush - Running Up That Hill 29 Cyndi Lauper - Time After Time 29 Ultravox - Dancing with Tears in My Eyes 26 Nik Kershaw - The Riddle 26 Tina Turner - What’s Love Got to Do With It 25 Queen - I Want to Break Free 25 Giorgio Moroder & Philip Oakey - Together in Electric Dreams 25 Baltimora - Tarzan Boy 24 Madonna - Like a Virgin 23 Colonel Abrams - Trapped +4 23 Tina Turner - We Don’t Need Another Hero (Thunderdome) 21 Stevie Wonder - Part-Time Lover 20 Bananarama - Robert De Niro’s Waiting 20 Thompson Twins - Doctor! Doctor! 20 The Commodores - Nightshift 20 Dee C. Lee - See the Day 20 U2 - Pride (IIIHTHIIIHNIIIIIIIIIIIHHHHH URGH LURRRRGH) -6 19 Elton John - Nikita 18 Ashford & Simpson - Solid 18 Spandau Ballet - Only When You Leave 16 Madonna - Material Girl 15 Bronski Beat & Marc Almond - I Feel Love (Medley) 14 Jimmy Nail - Love Don’t Live Here Anymore 12 UB40 - Don’t Break My Heart 10 Red Box - Lean On Me (Ah-Li-Ayo) 9 Status Quo - Marguerita Time

I love Miriam so much. Hope she massively outlasts her expectations.

This thread means that no more will one enter the extra-curricular Animal Antics thread to be amused/uplifted by, er, what the thread title promised, only to exit it more depressed having just read about a precious creature’s cancer death. Those posts can go here. This thread is dedicated to the memory of Tuan Tuan, giant panda of Taipei Zoo, who died recently aged 18.

Just in case you didn’t understand the complaints of other players, Wanamaker and I, that in bold is precisely the problem. If you considered giving + points to songs in the middle or above, and - points to those middle or below, you’d still be allowed to play. Maybe if you’d note the songs in order of your preference and score that way instead, then your scores would appear genuine.

Oh believe me, a couple of minutes with him would be enough to put you off. Not met Payne, not that I particularly want to. Give me Lewis Goodall and enough wine to change his gender preference though

Good lord. I'd like to officially take back my comparison between Willz' post and The Old Cremlin because to be compared to him AND Owen Jones in one day is far too harsh.