TheFunkyPhantom

I'm flattered then. I can assure everyone I'm flesh and blood(or skin & bone as my anti-vegan diet dietician likes to call it). I will being going up in smoke up the crematorium chimney just like the rest of you: I ain't no howling banshee

Barry Manilow sings the All Time Great Broadway songbook...and fuck anyone who says I'm a shirtlifter

I've spent a lifetime studying illness,usually in others,though the odd squint into the mirror every now and then always helps to determine when early intervention is needed in oneself,and I can honestly report that with a lot of maladies things look far far worse than they actually are. Hope that helps

Whatever that means...

Lol I don't believe it! Shushhh. Stop spreading scurrilous rumours. I've partly come on to DL to cruise for 'hot chicks' as I've heard it's a bit like Tinder®, but for the morbidly afflicted. My kind of woman!

Attenborough would come as a great shock to many. I hope we can squeeze another decade out of him before that happens

Thank you for reminding us all of his BAT days

Cuddly cheroot puffing,hush puppy schlepping,jazz bopping,Brexit cussing,baccy pushing Ken Clarke

Yes,but only up to 12. His numeraliteracy skills sorely let him down after that

Hmmmmm...There's a thought

He also played a decidedly camp and outre replacement Sheriff of Nottingham in a late Robin of Sherwood episode. I just hope the red tops eventually suceed one day in enticing the cash enchanted Mr Allen to loosen his tongue and clear up this showbiz mystery once and for all. I shall leave it there too,ducky...for now

True.But in this instance what with this other fella being a 'bit camp' and,presumably,taking Dale up the ar*e of a lunchtime, the two terms would appear to be synonymous. And happily so. To be camp in a hyper-masculinised culture such as ours takes either huge bravery or stupidity. I can't see anyone inclined to be predominantly straight risking ridicule and,as is so often the case,opprobrium and violence,if they weren't...just for a giggle

Dale had unconventional taste in men

Might I add the following names of some women of my past acquaintance who really deserve mentioning-and not only for their gaudy chosen monikers,but for the fact their ugly names beaitifully matched their characters: Gabi,Scarlett,Jessie-May,Patricia,Laloutha & Charmaine... To even things up,here's a list of male names I despise: Paul. Apparently the prison population has more Pauls languishing within Her Majesty's walls than any other represented name.Vile appellation thankfully now relegated to the dead pool of evil, along with Myra,Ian,Harold & Jeremy

Arthur Lowe...Or Mr Peacock.from Are you Being Served.Ronnie Barker even.He was big in Porridge at the time.Or Leonard Rossiter...there were rumours about him around the time of the late lamented Operation Yewtree. Just a few ideas to mull over

Who would have thought Rock Hudson? Or Liberace,come to think of it? Who knows what they're like off screen? Years and years before he came out,I had TV's Victor Mildew give me the glad eye...mind you I was standing outside a public lavatory at the time(I was waiting for me old mum to come out...well that's my excuse)

That pairing would certainly make you laugh :-/

For some reason I'm thinking Dad's Army

I hear some people in Liverpool are paying their own little tribute by piling their supermarket trollies to the gunwales and wheeling them out of the store without paying. As Dale used to say: "If you can get past security without hearing the beep,you know you've won the home run on Supermarket Sweep!"

Please don't let it be Inspector Morse :-/

I'm not saying he would. I would appreciate it if you removed your comment forthwith and apologise unreservedly for suggesting I would slur any facet of Ronnie Bigg's otherwise blemish free existence

I just have to say I was mightily disappointed with my recent purchase of Death List® Boxers.Whilst of the highest quality per se and lovingly assembled with stitching by only the highest of highly skilled Bangladeshi seamstresses,I feel somewhat cheated by the obvious defiencies,if I might call them that,that immediately arrest one's gaze upon removing the pantyloons from their secure packaging, viz: the 'budgie bulge' shown in the photo was sorely missing.Imagine my horror.Some of us are less,ahem, well endowed than others.It's a fact.I'm not one of them. But it's nevertheless a fact for some underperforming men. I made the purchase on the promise of a padded crotch bulge,which clearly,despite photographic evidence,doesn't in reality come as a design feature with this otherwise superbly machined luxury gentleman's undergarment whose Death List® logo can surely only enhance the frisky love life of a bachelor about town and have highly discerning ladies swooning in their multitudes. Bitterly disappointing. I wish I'd gone with my first choice of the thong instead now...

No.I think in every way it's as sick as the Daily Mail claims.Let's not pretend otherwise & just enjoy the ride...we're all on it!

I have to take you to task over the second 'positive': her nose always did.There's nothing new there,septum-less or no

Don't worry,mate,if you ever kick the bucket whilst I'm still on,I'll set up a shrine to you here in aspatria: it'll consist of a half eaten kebab poking out the top of an empty bottle of codeine linctus(the two things Maryport is chiefly known for) which I will then symbolically set fire to on the highest point,which,according to my ordinance survey map,can be seen from the Maryport needle exchange building