The country was in a terrible state
When the Commons rose for a budget debate
It was a few minutes before Kwarteng spoke up
and then said "Sex will now cost a grand a fuck"
Whether you're short, little, long, fat or thick
The tax will be paid for the use of your prick
Streeting said "Now look Kwasi dear
will this tax apply to us boys that are queer?"
Sad Pincher rose and looked very glum
"Will I be exempt cos' I only want bum?"
Kwarteng replied and sounded quite lairy
The tariff will be doubled for you, you lecherous fairy
Sir Keir then rose to tremendous applause
He grabbed Liz Truss and ripped off her drawers
He straddled across her and rode her at will
And shouted to Kwasi "add that on my tax bill"
Big Tiz then shouted "I think I'll resign
I haven't had sex for a very long time
I dream every night of Liz's moist pussy
But I take anyone's as I can't be fussy"
The debate carried on and oh what a sight
Sunak was wanking the whole of the night
Speaker Hoyle then said "let the voters decide
But I think they'll baulk at a grand a ride"
So now in the bedrooms of Britain at night
There's many a pussy that's willing but tight
We're taxed on our booze and we're taxed on our fags
But we didn't expect to be taxed on our shags
If a grand a ride is the price we must pay
we can no longer afford a regular lay
to quench our frustrations we now have to wank
and for the state of the country we've got a fat Johnson to thank.
