Lard Bazaar

A bit morbid? This is a fucking forum that predicts people’s death for fucksake! And let me be absolutely clear - I DO hope he gets fucking shot in the face. And fucking soon. He has no regard whatsoever for any other human being. He is a waste of valuable oxygen and offers absolutely nothing to a civilised society. And he’s absolutely thick as fucking mince. With respect to other posters, there’s no ‘I think what Lard actually means here is....’ at all - because what I actually mean is I hope he fucking dies horribly and painfully.

Yeh, that’s right, I’m ‘edgy’ for thinking Trump is an asshole. So that makes 95% of the world’s sane population edgy too, right? Go send some Californian water to the sea to stop the little fishies drowning.

I don’t think you get one as standard, I think you or a family member have to actually ask for one. And I would jolly well hope that any family of his have taken him off their birthday card list, as he’s a bad egg! Actually I just checked this, if you get state pension you don’t have to apply for a birthday card, they’ll get in touch with you. But if you don’t get a state pension then you have to ask. Fascinating.

When is someone going to shoot this total cunt in the face? How can we live in a world where there are people who find it acceptable to shoot decent superstars like John Lennon, Martin Luther King, John F Kennedy, Gianni Versace, Tupac, Lots Of Other Rappers, Gandhi, Lee Harvey Oswald, Abraham Lincoln, and Jill Dando but nobody will turn this sack of shit’s brain into soup?

I preferred Why Can’t This Be Love after David Lee Roth left. Nothing is worse than Def Leppard though.

Might as well Jump. Into a coffin.

Hi there

An interesting revival of this thread brings up this nugget which turned out to be a complete lie. I did indeed leave the UK on a massive ship last year. I was supposed to be leaving it again on a massive ship next year but thanks to Covid I think that will be cancelled. Nothing at all to do with wigs.

Ooo yes, Crosswits, well remembered!

You’ve forgotten Name That Tune legend Tom O’Connor. I’ll name that corpse in one.

Of course his will be the most tremendous case in the history of viruses. Nobody has ever had such a tremendous virus. In fact his virus is tremendously smarter than everyone else’s by infecting the most tremendous president they’ve ever had. I hope he fucking dies tremendously.

I suppose there’s the angle that a lot of people are taking, of women should be able to show their emotions about miscarriage and infant death, and raise awareness etc, which I wholeheartedly agree with - just not with hospital bed half-naked shots designed to draw attention. If someone tried to take photos of me sat in a bed grief stricken at the loss of a child, even if it was the child’s father, I’d kick fuck out of them.

Absolutely heartbreaking the lengths people will go to for attention by posting pictures like this. I’m fairly ‘whatever’ about stuff but really, ‘hey babes pose for a nice mean and moody black and white shot of you blubbing, that will raise our Insta likes!’ All sympathy lost right there.

Whichever one was the drummer is the one I’d bang.

I wish I’d been born nine or ten years earlier, would have loved being a 70s punk but instead I was an 80s goth!

You dirty bastard. You dirty fucker. What a fucking rotter.

Isn’t that a Beautiful South song?

Jeez, at least Caster Semenya hides her dick.

Noel Gallagher called, he wants his eyebrows back.

Yeh, looking good for an 8 year old corpse. WAIT, I get it now. Sorry, I’m not very well. I’ll go back to sleep.

Deathlist Champion of Unique Picks and all round fucking legend, Lard Bazaar is 24 today.

A more eco friendly version from Viz from about 30 years ago

Due to extreme flat feet and a titanium shin I am unable to walk in heels. Could probably shit in them though

What the fuck?

Number 2 for me (see what I did there?) I’ve got a poo stool to put my feet on as I’m so short, it gives me greater strain-ability.