Lard Bazaar

I wouldn’t give yourself too much credit for ‘routing’ people out, people just stopped posting because the forum became a meeting place for completely tedious cunts.

I don’t know - I can’t remember as far back as this morning and once they’re on I can’t see them because my belly’s in the way.

Was that your M.O.?

Jesus THAT’S IT! I’m a FUCKING MOUSE!

What a fucking mess.

I bloody love Frankie Boyle. His suits always look too big for him though.

we have all of a sudden become very British and polite, we’ll be getting a warning off the mods soon we will need to agree to disagree - thankfully at present I have no need to go anywhere, apart from a supermarket every ten days or so - let’s just hope that we can all avoid this and keep well as much as possible and we can all get back to arguing with each other about how stupid the committee were for leaving that minor folk singer from Latvia off the list

I do respect your articulate and clear post however I still don’t buy it. Even if washing hands is better than gloves, how many patients are going to wash their hands after every single instance of touching something whilst going about their hospital business - open a door, wash your hands, open the next door, wash your hands, touch the checking in desk, wash your hands, bog wash your hands, cup of tea wash your hands, it’s simply not going to happen - wear gloves and they haven’t touched anything with their skin and they can chuck them away when they leave. Nothing is going to completely eliminate the risk of infection but a physical barrier has got to be better than relying on people to wash it away.

Good wishes, feel better real soon

Are you for real? So what about the hundred other members of the public that have been in and out of the hospital bog that day that may or may not be infected, we can’t catch it off them, no? You’re batshit mate.

Isn’t that what the internet was invented for?

I got one in 2011 from Magere Hein just so I could see what it felt like. A bit like when that bloke shot that other bloke in Reno or wherever it was, just to watch him die.

Part of my job is dealing with paperwork for cases where our ‘clientele’ have pegged it, I generally have approximately 10 ‘hits’ a week - as of 5pm today I already have 30 for the past two days. If only my deadpooling rate was that good!

And there we have it.

At this rate we’ll end up with Ian Beale in charge.

I’m in no way a Boris fan, but if someone has to die I’d rather it was that absolute shitpipe Rees Mogg.

I think he’s toast as well.

Taxi for LFN - to HELL!

Not really, there has been a dip on Sundays due to delays in reporting deaths, it will rise again come Monday/Tuesday.

Flippin eck!

FTFY

I bloody knew you’d show your face on this one

My best mate’s dad chased a boy her sister was going out with all the way down College Road with a meat cleaver.

At least one of them is old enough to be his grandmother, his eldest sister will be 65. My own dad was a GREAT-grandad at 61.

There’s a a Just The One Of Us joke in here somewhere.