thefunkyfaz

Controversially I'll plump for Peter Falk. Sorry, Norman Wisdom.

I've just remebered the time he was snuffling for truffles on Shooting Stars. "Mmm...Nice, nice!" Totally absurd but very funny...

I feel that, after 26 years, it's about time that Postman Pat dealt with some serious issues to give preschoolers a good grounding in handling bereavement. I shall be writing to CBeebies to express this sentiment, and on the strength of this suggestion I'm nominating Mrs Goggins, who must have been about 85 when the show first started. Or maybe Alf Thompson will meet with an unfortunate farming accident. Come to that, how old must Jess be now...? Perhaps I've started on the mulled wine too early this morning.....

Former Miss Argentina, Solange Magnano, has died from complications following cosmetic surgery on her buttocks. Yes, her buttocks. http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/...ck-surgery.html What a pain in the...oh never mind...

Steven Tyler from Aerosmith has been "rushed to hospital" after falling off stage... http://uk.news.launch.yahoo.com/dyna/artic...amp;e=l_news_dm Condition currently unknown... A word of warning - next time he tells you to walk this way, don't. It's obviously dangerous...

I've sent a request to join the Facebook group.....

The firm I worked for in the early 90s had a slightly dippy secretary. The first time she had to use the fax machine was interesting...she was told to fax a letter but mark it "private and confidential." She typed the letter, marked it as instructed.....put it in an envelope, sealed it and shoved it in the fax. Well, at least she didn't stick a stamp on it first... And yes - she was blonde.

What prescience honez: Pugwash creator Ryan dies aged 88 Of course, all that nonsense about Seaman Staynes, Master Bates and Roger the cabin boy was just an invention of that bloke who used to be funny, Victor Lewis Smith. True, it was Tom the cabin boy. But if Roger the cabin boy wasn't a sexual offence, surely Muffin The Mule and Dobbin' The Horse certainly were I've always thought Noggin' the Nog sounded like a euphemism...

Hmm. I'd never actually heard of Bill O'Reilly until I read this, so I've no idea what his track record was like. I just thought it was good to see someone saying "pull yourselves together" to the people who were going over the top in mourning someone most of 'em had never even met, and having a pop at the double standards in the media. Murdered? By a government agency? Definite echoes of Diana now. Still, he was the people's prince (of pop).

http://uk.news.yahoo.com/1/20090712/ten-o-...ks-c60bd6d.html A voice of common sense, pity he's getting pilloried for it...

I really miss John Inman...

Oh deep joy. As if bird flu and swine flu weren't enough, look what's could be coming our way, courtesy of our cross-Channel Gallic chums - diseased chipmunks. http://uk.news.yahoo.com/5/20090723/tuk-di...uk-45dbed5.html Apparently they carry ticks which can spread Lyme disease. And what is Lyme disease? Well, mild cases can cause, yes, you've guessed it, "flu-like symptoms." And worse cases can lead to deterioration of the nervous system, dementia and/or heart failure. Lovely. Oh, and the chipmunks "may also carry rabies." Pesky rodents.....

This day in 1403 saw the demise (execution) of the 1st Earl of Worcester, one Lord Percy... No, not that one... It also saw the passing of Rumpole (Leo McKern) in 2002 (7 years ago! I'd have said 4 at most...) and Ulysses S Grant in 1885...

Sniffing petrol before getting tasered by the police... Possible to survive, as proved here, but probably not recommended...

http://uk.news.yahoo.com/1/20090722/ten-wi...al-c60bd6d.html Now you too could smell like Winehouse! The question is...why would anybody want to?

Hmm...one of my old music teachers (who at the time of this was teaching at a different school) was in the news recently for all the wrong reasons... http://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/UK-News/T...ton_Behind_Bars He's not dead, but I'd say his career is. Shame - he taught me all I know about Mussorgsky. Mind you, 6 months at Her Majesty's is a bit harsh... We also had a French/German teacher who used to turn up to lessons either drunk or hungover and would sit there belching and flicking snot at people. He left around 1989 and I've recently heard that he now walks the streets of Frinton on Sea wearing women's clothing. And yet, my old school had an excellent reputation...

Only just looked at this thread! Ah yes, schooldays, the best days of your life... One of my old teachers, who sadly passed away this time last year, got an obit in the Times Online - quite impressive, but well deserved as he was a local legend. http://timesonline.typepad.com/line_and_le...-bayes-rip.html But talking of PE sadists teachers, we had one - the aptly nicknamed "Piggy" Minns, who obviously modelled himself on Brian Glover's character in "Kes." He'd decide which football/hockey/thugby team he'd play on as well as being the referee, and if you were on the opposing team, you could expect to get injured by Piggy's huge bulk charging at you. There was a rumour circulating at the time that Piggy's wife left him for one of the history teachers because she was fed up with him wanting his "conjugal entitlements" dressed in a Spiderman costume...don't know if the rumours were true but I'd like to think they were..... Just two of a vast host of characters from my schooldays.....

http://uk.news.yahoo.com/21/20090716/thl-c...lu-d831572.html

Methinks he'll die with a smile on his face then...

Two Tony Harts in one year? Now that's just greedy. Does that count as double points though?

Poppins his clogs then? Oh, and could we alter this thread title slightly...pedants like me get easily irritated when we see "there" when it should plainly be "their". So they're. Sorry, I realised it myself just after I wrote it. You have to remember that outside this forum I almost never speak or write in English, so it is somewhat easier for me to make mistakes than it is for the other people here. Don't worry - my knowledge of Dutch is limited to "dank u wel" and "Het Kanon."

Poppins his clogs then? Oh, and could we alter this thread title slightly...pedants like me get easily irritated when we see "there" when it should plainly be "their". So they're.

Thanks for moving this - I did do a forum search for "last words" but couldn't find this, hence the new thread. Very odd. Mind you, it was getting late... Keith Moon's last words were pretty memorable - after asking (telling) his girlfriend to cook him a steak for breakfast he told her "if you don't like it you can f*** off." She did, and hours later he was found dead of an (accidental) overdose.

Thought it was about time there was a thread devoted to the final utterances of the great and the good before they breathed their last. For example...John le Mesurier's last words were.... "It's all been rather lovely." Very Wilson-esque. Quote away, folks!

Didn't Hitler express similar sentiments? You big Nazi you. Why shouldn't we, the taxpayers of this land, be able to financially support these thick, lazy scroungers poor, underprivileged people via Government theft our nation's tax system and the easy if you're an immigrant or push out lots of kids but hard if you should genuinely be entitled totally fair benefit system?