maryportfuncity

So, things are kicking off, positions are being adopted etc. etc. If one thing's prompted this thread more than owt else it's hearing on the news a couple of days back that the average age of Conservatives announcing they won't stand again is around 52, a full twenty years younger than the average age of Labour retirees. Deserting Tories include George Eustice (51), Red Wall darling Dehenna Davison (29) , Chloe Smith (40), Andrew Percy (45) and - perhaps biggest surprise - William Wragg (34). Granted you can find inidividual reasons, like kids and boundary changes but some of these have the youth and talent to ride out Tory tides and play the long game. I'm wondering if the private polling done by all political parties is starting to tell on their resolve as the pollsters come to Conservative Party HQ and say "They fucking hate us!" Similarly, Starmer's long-game appears to be working but I'm wondering what the odds at Corals would be if you bet on seeing "Starmer" and "Charisma" on a newspaper front page in the next year. Likely to be tactical voting on a hitherto unimagined scale to skew any pollsters plans to call it and a few other wildcards in there (like the way the Tories handle the dwindling fortunes of the chubster who preceded the Truss calamity). A veritable Deathlist banter-fest, then, Let's get among it! My best guess is late Summer 2024 election, thin Labour outright majority, unruly left wing backbenchers scuppering Starmer, the Lib Dems suspicious after the coalition calamity forcing voting reform as the price of any confidence and supply deal and the SNP, reduced but still influential, proving a wild card. And Rhys-Mogg providing the Portillo moment on the day.

There's a load of people whose whereabouts remain unknown, but may be worth a punt and points if selected on a deadpool. A few obvious - Lucan, Bin Laden etc - get mentioned. But if we pool our collective brains we might hit on a few more. Like Bambi Woods age, whereabouts, real name uncertain. I'd say alive and willing the world to leave her alone, but you never know. C'mon guys, who else is missing in action?

He was discussed in The Sunday Times this morning and the comment was made that his condition had got so bad that he couldn't even blink. Yeah, seriously, incredibly brave in the circumstances, a truly horrible medical condition.

So, nobody offering evidence of a death sneaking in ahead of Tin Oo, then Turning in after a night of exceptional music - thinking I'll declare a winner when I'm next conscious

Yers all know the score by now...21 entrants (20 quickest off the mark plus your host and - ahem - master, Maryportfuncity). Competition opens on 1 June with the aim of getting a winner by midsummer's day. This is Maryport’s Midsummer Madness Dead Pool 2024 (That’ll be MMMDP to you lot!) MMMDP Hall of Fame: 2016 – Spade Cooley (Jerome Lewis) 2 June 2017 - CaptainChorizo (Errol Christie) 11 June 2018 – The Dead Cow (Irene Jones) 1 June 2019 - Clorox Bleachman (Ani Yudhoyono) 1 June 2020 – Toast (Willie Thorne) 17 June 2021 –Perhaps (Nacho Laun) 1 June 2022 – Drol (Zeta Emilianidou) 6 June 2023 - An Fear Beag (Beverley Shade) 2 June 2024 - drol (Tin Oo) 1 June MASTERLIST 1. Simon Cowell MBE - Summer in Transylvania 2. Anne Baker – Wannamaker 3. Jayapataki Swami – ThereWillBeDeaths 7 4. Jane McAlevey – Book 5. Tin Oo – Drol 6. Noam Chomsky – Grimgrass 7. Steve McMichael – Steve (troll) 8. Jimmy Carter – Billiogryphon 9. Mažeika Patricio Sulliván – Spade Cooley 10. Frank Caprio – theoldlady 11. Esther Rantzen – Sean 12. Henry Mountcharles – gcreptile 13. Albert Fujimori – Charles de Gaulle 14. Paul Harrell – An Fear Beag 15. Muazzez İlmiye Çığ – Captain Chorizo 16. Betty Webb – time 17. Linda Nolan – The Old Crem 18. Amarildo – perhaps 19. Jane Morgan – Great Uncle Bulgaria 20. Sven-Goran Eriksson – Grim up North 21. John Hemigway - Maryportfuncity

Speaks volumes about both sides here, Starmer assuming she gives a shit, Abbot, having apparently not given a shit for years, might actually demonstrate that she does. Wouldn't want to call this, esp.since someone with early Parinson's could milk the expenses for a year or two in the upper house!

84 in about five weeks, looks in superb shape

One of the Harrisons, not sure if it's Dean or Nathan. Either way - TT practice underway, that's usually a warning that this thread'll bob to the top once or twice in the next few days

Aye, congrats (provisionally) Drol I'll update the hall of fame and swap messages about a generous prize tomorrow, firstly because there's always the possibility that you didn't win and details will emerge of an (unlikely) quicker resolution to this gleefully rapid dead pool, and secondly because a night out including shameless noodling prog rock and a few pints beckons, so I might be otherwise engaged tonight. Wiki, btw, confirms today as his last Here's yer man in more upright and successfully respirating times:

So, Tory fortunes aren't exactly improving - the two conspicuous die hard papers are't exactly accross the main election news. Meanwhile, is Boris betting on a job with Trump if he still wins?

I'm guessing the DDP and HPDP will throw up loads of candidates fit for a paragraph and unfit for a busy thread or proper obit. Mebbe a good idea to collect such creatures on one thread so's those of us with an - ahem - sporting interest can keep tabs on 'em. I'll cop for having such an interest in Rachil Jonze, who might just be this year's Ms Groves. Similarly Ian McNicol may afford us that combination of brief media coverage and ongoing ranter fire we've come to know and love over the years. and Dawn Hughes' illness was the subject of television coverage as part of Channel 4's 'Mummy Diaries.' She's also made appearances on BBC television and the BBC web site, her husband works for the Beeb. Then there's everyone's favourite pin up: Winnie Langley. I took a long-shot punt on her for the DDP mainly because I thought if she went the various papers who'd covered her 100th birthday wouldn't be able to resist running that great picture again. Anyone else gonna cop for long shot picks before OoO and NAP do their duty and reveal all?

Sorted, and I think the others are all breathing, just - battle commences in 48 mins

I'd say I struggle to tell the difference between a man of strong convictions and a narcissist who goes into overdrive when there's a threat of someone else taking control away from him. In deadpooling terms the two things that manifest the same way are a long way apart, Nelson Mandela's strong convictions survived years of jail and he died a contented old man. Trump's on my current DDP team, and catching his tellytubby belly sideways on the BBC tonight I still think a stroke or heart attack might be lurking in there.

Some authors seem to go on for ages and they don't appear on boards like this because they often stay out of the public eye. Many people simply assume they're dead. However the following are unlikely to be setting sprint world records or clocking up high sales figures for pin up calenders these days. J.D 'Catcher in the Rye' Salinger, 1919 - Harper 'To Kill a Mockingbird' Lee, 1926 - Robert M 'Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintainence' Pirsig, 1928 -

They might if their own research suggests it's one reason they can't get above the low 20s in polling

Aye, and... There's plenty of double entendre material here with regard to her standing, doubtless we'll have fun aplenty on this thread for a short while. On a serious note, she'll be in the public eye to a greater degree than she has been since Corbyn was ousted, and that's a form studying opportunity right there. Let's see which news organisation goes first with whether she's healthy enough to get elected.

Seriously, an unseamly scramble for bodies in what were winnable seats five years back would be a terrible look at this stage, giving Rishi some hard questions about whether he knew wtf he was doing running the election past eight close cabinet members and then going public, not to mention it making The Conservative Party look like a sinking ship. When you think where their fortunes were five years back...Interesting times for sure!

For the busy DL'er facing too many choices in too little time, this is the thread to provide advance warning of media coverage of those we might like to 'research.' Studs Terkel - 94 year old author, still chucking them out - is on The Culture Show, BBC2, next Saturday, repeated Sunday.

There's rules, and that and back when I started this kind of thing my dead pools were notable hangouts for low hanging fruit - I'm thinking ANY of the unpicked above would qualify because there'll be English language news sources in their countries that'd throw up acceptable obits. The requisite rule is below: 9 - An "obit" in the context of the MMMDP is any news report in English from a reliable source. Such sources include - but are not limited to - UK national press, UK national broadcast organisations, foreign press and broadcast organisations with an English language thread to their communication, trade press in English, local news organisations reporting in English and coverage in specialist online sites, such as those monitoring the well-being of super-centenarians. Where dispute arises over the qualifying nature of a news source for obit purposes MPFC's decision is final. But he wants fast and furious competition and is generally very amenable to low hanging dead pool fruit of all varieties.

What could possibly go wrong from here...well, one of them might not see tomorrow, here's hoping: MASTERLIST 1. Simon Cowell MBE - Summer in Transylvania 2. Robert Pickton – Wannamaker 3. Jayapataki Swami – ThereWillBeDeaths 7 4. Jane McAlevey – Book 5. Tin Oo – Drol 6. Noam Chomsky – Grimgrass 7. Steve McMichael – Steve (troll) 8. Jimmy Carter – Billiogryphon 9. Mažeika Patricio Sulliván – Spade Cooley 10. Frank Caprio – theoldlady 11. Esther Rantzen – Sean 12. Henry Mountcharles – gcreptile 13. Albert Fujimori – Charles de Gaulle 14. Paul Harrell – An Fear Beag 15. Muazzez İlmiye Çığ – Captain Chorizo 16. Betty Webb – time 17. Linda Nolan – The Old Crem 18. Amarildo – perhaps 19. Jane Morgan – Great Uncle Bulgaria 20. Sven-Goran Eriksson – Grim up North 21. John Hemigway - Maryportfuncity

Pick 21 - masterlist imminent

OOOhhh TWO more places, seriously, where could we find a brace of ageing dead pooling talent guaranteed a q/o the instant they cark?

FOUR more places available before I sweep in and grab the last one Wonder where we might find four more obitable types no longer in their prime

Aye, keep 'em comin' - non of yers have my favoured pick so far- seven more spaces available, don't all rush at once!

MMMDP Form Guide #27 Alvin Bragg If you were looking for hot talent that wasn't quite as hot until the start date, yer man who's currently district attorney in New York County is likely looking over his shoulder a little more than he was before the former president was convicted. Nice speech in the wake of that verdict about how it proves fairness in US legal proceedings etc. Well, that's about half the country convinced, then, the question being how many of the dangerous psychos are died-in-wool Trumpites?