themaninblack

I know for a fact that the team was picked by Margaret Thatcher's ghost...

Is Bob's funeral on the telly, then?

Nobody could have seen this coming Surprised he didn't die of skin cancer!

Nobody could have seen this coming Surprised he didn't die of skin cancer!

No one picked him before either, which is odd.

Well the mighty may fall but they still the favours. We'll see that at Old Trafford next week, possibly...

Dundee Utd will piss on Rangers anyway, they always do in the cup...

Dead Well done, DDT. I think we have competition going on now...

A final word from the Sarge...

Here's one for the "cool" types.. Death of a hipster

Any way, Russell Brand's mother has cancer...

Are you Alan Partridge?

why do you seem worried that it won't break out?

Sadly? Surely not? That said, he had some great Man City gags to be fair...

Elena Baltacha has liver cancer.

You'd have to ask Halliburtons that...

I'm not going to claim any credit for this so I will directly quote Matthew Norman's joke about the man with the crocodile which was published in the Independent recently:

There will be that and much more on "Mock the Week"...

I think the word "impotent" is inappropriate because it rather suggests that they were actually somehow useful or effective in the first place. They are about as useful to the people of Europe as a Nick Clegg t-shirt is to an 18 year old student who's trying to get laid. Seems like guest bagged the fish, Spade..

Whoever garrots George Osborne with piano wire I suppose...

and this is a fuck you

Thats the only death to report .We seem to be in a really shitty quiet period on the death front.Nothing to report at all You're telling me that with a straight face?

Mark Lawson is leaving BBC Radio 4's Front Row for "personal reasons". Don't think it's health related.

ABANDON SHIP!!