Lady Die

Mary had a little skirt with splits right up the sides and every time that Mary walked the boys could see her thighs Mary had another skirt twas split right up the front ...but she didn't wear that one very often Mary had a little lamb Her father shot it dead. Now it goes to school with her, between two chunks of bread. Simple Simon met a Pieman, going to the fair. Said Simple Simon to the Pieman, What have you got there? Said the Pieman unto Simon, Pies, you d*ickhead. Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the kings horses and all the kings men, said "F*** him, He's only an egg. Mary had a little lamb It ran into a pylon. 10,000 volts went up it's *** and turned it's wool to nylon Georgie Porgy pudding and pie. kissed the girls and made them cry. When the boys came out to play, He kissed them too, cause he was gay. Jack and Jill Went up the hill to have some hanky panky. Silly Jill forgot her pill And now there's little Franky. Old Mother Hubbard Went to the cupboard to fetch her poor dog a bone. When she bent over Rover took over, And gave her a bone of his own. Little Boy Blew. Hey. He needed the money.

Info about the music used can be found here. (Scroll to the bottom of the page.) Thanks, Captain.

I'm going to enter too (first time). I was hoping to have George Best on my team but he let me down.

I see his house is in Shamley Green. I'm not far from there. I'll pop round for a cup of tea & check up on his health.

If you were a really crap pianist it would have to be renamed "Nobody does it Worse"

Does this make Harold Shipman the king? I'd say that should be Tony Bliar - for all the innocent civilians killed in Iraq.

Does anyone know what the 'Vision On' music is? Someone told me it's by Bartok - is that right?

Edit: Oooh it's a bit small (first time I've added a pic) Click on it to see it bigger. BTW we seem to have TWO George Best threads now!

I suppose in the modern age of acting an actor goes for both men and women. I don't think it should be. The word actress was created for a purpose. Sadly some things have changed. We now call sitcoms Reality TV. The Guardian always calls actresses "actors" in its birthday list. But that's probably because it's an artyfarty newspaper.

He's down to 3 stone now.

Thanks for your kind words Lady G & scsibear. Nothing from Yogi?

Unless Joan has had a very bad sex change op, she's a comedienne, not a comedian I think "comedian" is a generic word for a funny person of either sex.

The contents of Best's Liver. I didn't know he liked brandy.

Have a face transplant

The contents of Best's death certificate

The would-be 100th executee has been spared.

So stop watching it then... Thanks for the tip.

On the subject of 24 hour drinking I once drunk all day ... then fell over (or at least slumped) at about 10pm. It was my 21st birthday. I vowed never to drink that much again .... and I have kept my vow. (YIPPEE ... my 1200th post!)

If that didn't make your eyes water you could try inserting a crampon next.

At least his new liver has lasted longer than George Best's did.

I'd really love to see the end of Joan Rivers. I'm sick of seeing her horrible face on QVC selling her overpriced crap jewellery. Is she really 72? She doesn't look it. In fact she doesn't look any age at all ... or even human for that matter.

Beatified? Or just plain, old-fashioned beaten? Maybe both? regards, Hein To be beatified she'd need to be dead.

Read all about embalming

Look! You can buy his uniform

Wonder if it was "Sudden Adult Death Syndrome"? Edit: Says here he had a heart attack.