Spade_Cooley

I, like a lot of people, have always valued The Old Crem's political insights, there's a reason he's known as the Lee Atwater of Deadpooling.

Well at least Dutch is know for his political views on the importance of everyone getting free healthcare and how there's nothing wrong with those in need asking for a handout.

Clement "Ike" Quartey, Ghana's first Olympic medallist thanks to a silver in light-middleweight boxing at the 1960 Games, dead at 86. Not to be confused with his more famous younger half-brother Isufu "Ike" Quartey, WBA Welterweight world champ and a legit boxing headliner in the late 90s.

Deathrace Form Guide #7 Abdullah the Butcher The "Madman from the Sudan" (from Ontario, Canada) had a career lasting nearly 60 years, wrestled in some 40 countries and gave hepatitis C to around 30 fellow wrestlers. Superstar Billy Graham famously tried to resign from the WWE Hall of Fame upon learning that he'd be sharing membership with the "worthless and embarrassing" Abdullah, and if you can't trust Superstar Billy when it comes to deadpooling who can you trust? His long-running health issues finally made it to GoFundMe levels over the summer, so will the former owner of Abdullah the Butcher's House of Ribs and Chinese Food be put in a box to go this January?

Thank you very much tiny sexy rat lookalike and notorious Hollywood asshole Anna Kendrick. Yep, cup season is back on the Deathlist and I'm going to be stumbling through the process as gamesmaster this year following Roey J. stepping down. A series of 100m sprints compared to the DDP's marathon, the Deathlist Cup has been won by all the greats: deadsox, DDT, An Fear Beag, gcreptile, and your boy Spade Cooley. Will we be engraving a new name on the trophy this year? Or will someone finally become the first two-time winner? Anyway, let us copy/paste Joey's rules from last year: The Deathlist Cup  1. This is a knockout tournament featuring one-on-one matchups between Deathlist forum posters. These matches will be determined by use of a random draw, using Random.org.   2. Unless we happen to end up with 2/4/8/16/32/64 entrants, then certain competitors will get byes to the Second Round. This will be based on results from the 2021 Cup: ie, winners first. 3. Players, on receiving their randomly drawn opponent, will have a ten day period to send the Referee their First Eleven for the match by PM, and one sub in case of an early death. These eleven picks can be very low hanging fruit if you so wish, as the point of the game is to score as many “goals” during the month a match is played. ie, a perfect team would look like this 1. Adam Ant (joker) 2. Bob Backlund 3. Chelsea Clinton 4. Didier Drogba 5. Erika Eleniak 6. Frank Field 7. Green Gartside 8. Harry Hill 9. Ivan Ives (Russian rapper) 10. Joe Jackson 11. Kevin Keegan subs 12. Lennox Lewis 13. Meghan McCain 14. Nick Colte Would probably back Frank Field as a joker over Adam Ant though. 4. Banned picks – We're slightly more lenient than the DDP, but we're still banning Famous For Being Ill, people on Death Row (unless they die naturally), anyone who is a prisoner of a terrorist organisation, animals, the under 18s, and anyone who is "missing in action" but blatantly already dead. 5. Famous For Being Ill picks are those who have no notoriety outside of their cancer/other illness. If they played two matches for a Conference North team or they were mayor of a city in Kiribati back in the 90s, that's fine. If they're Joe Bloggs who is in a coma after refusing a covid vaccine or a Brave Parent Celebrating Their Last Christmas, they're not getting accepted. 6. If in doubt, submit a pick, but the decision of the ref (me) is final and is not open to any court of appeal. If you think it’s a dodgy pick, it probably is. 7. Each match will take place over the course of a single month. For example, a February match would take place from February 1st to February 28th (or 29th on a leap year), a March match from March 1st to March 31st and so on... 8. Games will be scored in the following manner: A person in your team dies = 3 points A unique person in your team dies = 1 more point (ie 1 bonus point) Fatality – Your joker. Double points 9. Here is what happens in the case of a team member dying prematurely (ie on 28th Feb for the March game). If you discover this before the 3rd of the month, your top sub will automatically go into place. If it is discovered on the 3rd or after, sorry about your luck. If it turns out the person was dead and known to be (this is determined via a reference in a newspaper or magazine, not social media) then subs don’t come into play. This will upset at least one player a year. Will it lead to a huffy forum stormout in 2022? Let's see. 10. At the end of the month, the player in the match with the highest score wins that game, and will advance to the next round. The player who doesn’t have the highest score will lose, and be eliminated. 11. In the event of a draw, the following tiebreaks will be used:  1st tiebreak = number of hits 2nd tiebreak = average age of hits 3rd tiebreak = a coin toss   12. A player is only held to one team for a single match. If they win their match and advance to the next round, they may pick eleven entirely different people for the next round. In this way, folk who announce their terminal illness in, say, May, can be put to good dead pooling use. 13. Qualifying obits? Every single English-language newspaper, magazine or significant website in the universe. Also Le Monde, Le Figaro, Der Spiegel, Die Zeit, El Pais, El Mundo and because I'm running it this year we're adding Corriere Della Sera. If they still can't get a QO from that, then they really weren't famous. 14. For the removal of any doubt, any players who do not send in their team before the deadline will be DQ'd and replaced by the highest scoring loser. No matter how many sad PMs you send afterwards.  This draw takes place in Month 1 (ie January) and is for matches taking place in Month 2 (February). After the draw, each player sends me (via PM) a team of eleven celebrities (and some subs hopefully) they think will snuff it in Month 2.  Good luck and sign up to take part in this thread. Entries close on January 21 with the draw to take place immediately after.

Thankfully, Hackman is the only person credited in both The Conversation and A Bridge Too Far, so we can't run into any further issues. Being as it's now very unlikely that either of us will win, I'm going to go proper punt for my pick: give me Colin Farrell (the character actor perhaps most famous as Norris in Porridge, rather than the granny-shagging Irishman who somehow scammed a career as an A-lister for a few years in the 00s).

The DDP gamerunner's special, December 31st

Ze Carlos, 1998 Brazil World Cup squad Pointless answer (indeed he played his only ever game for the Seleção in the semi-final, and was never called up again), dead at 56.

Form-spotting opportunity tomorrow night when the latest "here's some old TV shows, fucking have them for dinner" Freeview channel, Rewind TV, moves into original programming with an hour-long interview/retrospective with Michael Aspel.

Brazilian heavyweight Adilson Rodrigues, an icon in his own country, dead from pugilistic dementia aged 66. Made it to the top of some US cards in the late 80s/early 90s, where fights with the likes of Evander Holyfield and George Foreman undoubtedly aided that condition.

This Chapman obituary from when he died in 2001 still lists her as alive at the time. Plus the IMDB page has her appearing in roles in the 1980s, and they don't appear to be the conflation of two actors with the same name...

The worst kind of deaths imho

I thought Barry Evans died when the rent boy he hired decided to turn their business transaction into a robbery and went a little overboard with the fists (to the skull rather than etc etc). Compare and contrast with Paul Lynde, who (allegedly) also died while in the company of some hired male affection - he started to have a heart attack and the Latino gigolo promptly did a runner, worried that any arriving emergency services would discover he had no green card.

BREAKING: Police investigating an historical sexual offence allegation search a property owned by Sir Cliff Richard.

The "create your own Ulitzer night out" game continues unabated. Just combine a random hun-friendly female celebrity of the 2000s with a pre-Major Conservative political figure. For instance: All Bar One with Lisa Scott Lee and Keith Joseph.

Ahoy hoy.

Same, switched from Moreno to Eden.

The bit in Dear Diary where, so disgusted by a movie critic's positive review of Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer that he goes to the guy's house in the middle of the night and starts shouting the review through his letterbox, is one of my 10 favourite film scenes OAT.

It's how he'd want to be remembered.

Heck, everyone else has a project on the forum these days, why not me? We're gonna have a lot of free time over the coming weeks.... Starting off with 2000. "U Know What's Up" - Donell Jones featuring Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes (died April 25, 2002) "Girl on TV" - Lyte Funkie Ones (Rich Cronin died September 8, 2010. Devin Lima died November 21, 2018) "Mama Told Me Not to Come" - Tom Jones and Stereophonics (Stuart Cable died June 7, 2010) "Never Be the Same Again" - Melanie C featuring Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes "Smooth" - Santana featuring Rob Thomas ( Raul Rekow died November 2, 2015) "New Beginning/Bright Eyes" - Stephen Gately (died October 10, 2009) "If I Told You That" - Whitney Houston and George Michael (Houston died February 11, 2012. Michael died December 25, 2016) "Try Again"- Aaliyah (died August 25, 2001) "Maria Maria" - Santana featuring The Product G&B "Time to Burn" - Storm (Mark Spoon died January 11, 2006) "Body Groove" - Architechs featuring Nana (Ashley Akabah died February 2, 2020) "Could I Have This Kiss Forever" - Whitney Houston and Enrique Iglesias Possible additional name: "One More Time" by Daft Punk featured an uncredit Romanthony on vocals. He died May 7, 2013)

When I had my first rental property in LDN (glamorous Green Lanes), I slept through someone smashing the window and breaking into the house, and when they came into my room I just assumed it was the landlord and said "can you come back later I'm still asleep?"

Assuming that Pete and Bas don't count.... DJ Hollywood is 69, one of the many people who claim to have been the first person to rap over breaks at house parties.