honez

Ever heard of a thing called Google? Do you have any (valid) reasons for picking them or is this simple a wish list?

I was thinking of having a small wager on the Keno on Thursday night. Obviously I'd like a large return for my money, so I was wondering if you had any inside information I could use? Thursday's draw 768 in the NSW TAB looks to be where the money's to be made. Thanks, H

I'd hardly call it a non-descript season for Chester. After all, they managed to sneak one point off Wrexham out of two games. That's usually stellar season for Chester.

I don't know, maybe a five match day-nighter series with Aus v The-best-of-the-rest-of-the-world to make it less one-sided.

Poor comprehension this time Mr Macabre, I believe you are confusing XX and XY. (I suggest you Google it). Never mind, I wouldn't expect anything less from a self-proclaimed 5 A A-level, university qualified student, who appears to have difficulty stringing a sentence or two together. I find it a very poor excuse for someone to be too mega-busy to re-read what they post, when they a. Have the time to post on a forum such as this, b. Expect other people to have enough time to read their post when they can't be arsed themselves. c. Expect anyone else to be interested in their opinion if they themselves don't care how their opinion is interpreted, or whether it is even understood. Such a low signal-to-noise-ratio often results in whatever valid information there is being lost completely. I suggest that if you use small words, short sentences, and limit yourself to commas, full stops and sentence capitalisation, even DL members as dim-witted and laggardly as myself will be able to understand your brilliant and lofty memes. I'll also help free up some of your valuable time by offering to not read your posts, so you don't have to worry about me following anything complex you wish to post making sense or following any kind of pesky arbitrary communication, language or grammar conventions. Ah, the wonders of the ignore button. A win-win situation all round. As a super-brainy, superbly qualified and mega-busy person of such eminence, I'm sure you'd agree with this approach, and get on with whatever super-important stuff you're doing. Keep up the good work. It must be hard at the top.

Think about the future.

Dear Jon, I'm not sure whether 90% of us "on here" are how you guessed, I know I don't meet any of your criteria. But I suspect there is one "on here" exactly as as you describe. No doubt they are from Leeds and sign their posts as some kind of guest deity. Do drop in again to tell us how you think you are better than 90% of the members of the forum without knowing anything about them at all. Please give us some examples of exactly why you are better, just so we know how much higher in the pecking order you are for us to offer proper deference.

I was going to let this go, but when I got to the last sentence, I had to read, and re-read it a couple of times before I understood what you were trying to say. For God's sake, use punctuation if you want anyone to understand your witterings. For someone that once said... your ability/grasp leave a little to be desired.I disagree with the notion that this year's DeathList is a poor one. As has been pointed out before -- it hasn't been a good year for anyone (except maybe those that picked a certain young cancer-stricken girl).

I think it can go either way, she could be gone next week, or she could live to be 105. In my experience it is simply left up to chance. [...] You can never really know. Gee, I'm glad you cleared that up.

Claude clog-poppin' perhaps? Sounds like you had a good one. Congrats, and enjoy the spa, ie+.

Lion Mutilates 42 Midgets in Cambodian Ring-Fight

Bah! It's all photoshop work if you ask me. And as for climbing big buildings and plummeting from the top, there's obviously something phalic lurking in his psyche there.

After the Bob Woolmer incident at the Cricket World Cup, Pakistan may send a team to the Winter Olympics. They think they're in with a chance in the Bob Sleighing.

I do believe he sent me a nice email a while back asking if I'd be willing to help him shift a lazy $500 million out of a defunct account into my own. As I am already fantastically wealthy, I instructed my butler to not respond.

That's one better than my DDP entry HCW. I must be just a pretty face.

Mmm. They'd no doubt be delighted to receive it. They might even open up a new children's home named in his honour. Surely he wouldn't want to open an entire children's home? -- Just a quiet entry in their annals.

Why not think of them as deferring important things in their lives, just to devote some time to pissing you off? Surely you've got to feel good about them caring enough to want to piss you off that much? Take some pride in it. Relish the thought that they're probably going to get told off about wasting so much time on their computer. Take solace in the fact that their relationships are probably going downhill, just because they want to goad you one more time.

I've got an idea, but it'll take bloody big microwave and a rather large tupperware container. I think I'll send 'em an email to let 'em know.

So what's your problem, fatboy? Run out of doughnuts or something and now you're taking it out on us?

I posted a version of this with subtitles, then again someone could have made the subtitles up. Any of the Dutch posters know if they are correct? Sorry Mono I must have missed it first time around. It cracks me up every time I watch it

Good to see Flintoff setting a good example. Is he Gazza's younger brother?

Have an attack of the giggles. (Anyone know what the story is about?)

I'm surprised to hear Tender Le'vin-Care isn't as common as one would first think.

Ah, good old "Mobile Stitcher." I'm with my aptly anagrammed national carrier "Startle," who provide a similar level of service by the sound of it.

Okay, back on topic: Here's a pic of a cute baby squid.