honez

I wonder if the Prime Minister of Malta is willing to corroborate? "Is he dead?" "He must be" "Why?" "'cause the Prime Ministers said so, stupid".

Nice one GR. All heil the Reaper; grammar führer extraordinaire.

How about "a faery ass rat"?

I'd check your maths if I were you HCW.

I can definitely put this one to rest. I saw an interview on telly with Rolf talking about The Money or the Gun's Stairways to Heaven album. This was a compilation of recordings taken from a TV show in Australia, where each week, guest bands performed a version of Stairway to Heaven in their own unique style. It's got reggae, blues, jazz, in fact all sorts of different versions of the song, including Rolf's. When interviewed, the venerable Sir Rolf of the Harris admitted that he'd never heard the song before, so before going on the show, he got a copy of it in sheet music form so he could arrange his performance in his own style, digeridoos, wobble boards an' all. (I was disappointed he didn't use the stylophone though. ) See this Amazon.com reference. The link to Rolf's version seems to point to the wrong song though (and I can't be arsed going throught the rest to see if it's buried in there somewhere.)

As local folklore has it in the town I grew up in--on the Welsh side of the England/Wales border--there is still a medieval law in Chester that permits the locals to string up any Welshmen they catch inside the city walls after dark. It made for many an exciting night out, pubbing it in Chester in my youth.

Harking back to a previous post of mine, Sir Joh Bjelke-Petersen is a definite candidate if he holds on until 2005. He'll be 94 in January and is not at all well. To be honest, I expected him to be long gone by now. He's a cert to not-be-alive-come-the-end-of-05.

...as they say in Yorkshire: 'E. Bye, Gone.' [Well, sort of]

Dear VerySmallBoyfromHell, I believe 'Scritti Politti' is the band you're looking for.

Keith Miller dies aged 84. Possibly Australia's greatest allround cricketer. Here's what Michael Parkinson had to say about Keith. A great anecdote if ever I saw one...

Excellent. Well done that man.

You don't worry about the grammar police though...

Not for test tube babies it's not. Sure, it's still terminal, but for them it's more like the start of a Model-T Ford race--one quick crank and they're off.

If you're one of DeathList's lucky fifty then you get your name up in lights and a big red cross through a dodgy mug shot that Grim Reaper picked up off the 'net.

Gnarly dude. What a bunch of totally cool cats we must be. According to SlangSite.com - The Slang Dictionary sick: possessing exceptional talent. bad-ass. Example: You need to check out this band, they have a sick bass player. I feel sick.

Anyone know what the life expectancy is for someone who's had a quadruple bypass? Should I pencil the Clint in for 2014? At least he can die happy, whenever that'll be, now he's had a four-way

Never was there such a touching and well thought out eulogy. Well done. 10 points.

I'm trying to get you to open up your pod bay doors Hal. ...Ow, that's not the pod bay door, Dave.

That takes the cake

Anyone know who won gold in the one-legged arse kicking competition?

News is a bit harder to come by on the paralympics, but does anyone have inside information on any prospects or reports of anyone keeling over?

Just put him on 'Judge Judy' and be done with it. None of this trial by jury and innocent until proven guilty nonsense. She'll sort him out quicksmart. :-)

Jim'll fix that.

Chortle. My favourite commentator quote of all time has to be "The batsman's Holding, the bowler's Willey." Lot's more commentator gaffs here if you're looking to kill a couple of minutes.

From your icons, I see that you have The Suffering installed too. I suggest that you ignore the Microsoft error message and contact Microsoft Support directly on the phone. Tell them that you are desperate. Tell them that you haven't been able to play with it for ages. Tell them that you're frustrated not being able to play with your Dick Burns and The Suffering is getting too much. Also be sure to tell them that they can send a technician over to give you a hand.