scsibear

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Take the Ned/Chav test.

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EnjoyyerweedramHCWahmhuvvinaweesherbettoo

Microsoft gets in on the Act ================= Windows Recall It has come to our attention that a few copies of the Scottish version of Windows 98 may have accidentally been shipped outside Scotland. If you have one of the Scottish editions you may need some help understanding the commands. The Scottish edition may be recognized by looking at the opening screen. It reads WINDAES 98, Ye Ken, with a background picture of William Wallace superimposed on a St. Andrews Cross. It is shipped with a Mel Gibson screen saver. The Recycle Bin is labelled Bog Dialup Networking is called Ma Mates Control Panel is known as How Tae F**k Aboot Wi The Settins Hard Drive is referred to as Big Disk Floppies are Them Wee Plastic f***kers Instead of an error message you get a Windae covered with an empty Buckfast bottle Note that Windaes 98 does not recognise capital letters or punctuation marks Other locale-specific features in Windaes 98 include the following language translations: OK=its aww-right cancel=F**k off reset=whit yoo aw aboot yes=aye no=nay f****n' chance find=get it yer f****n' sel' go to=orr therr help=ah cannae dae it stop=gie's f****n peace start=f****n' move settings=settins programs=stuff at does stuff documents=ma S**t Some programs that are also exclusive to Windaes 98 include: tiperiter = a word processor cullerin book = a graphics program addin mershene = calculator scratch paper = notepad (usually unused) sounds = CD player porn = Microsoft Internet Explorer pikchers = a graphics viewer dole money = M/S accounting software Sellik = a spreadsheet of Celtic F.C.'s recent scores Bevvy = local off-licences by area code and price of Tennent's Super cuzzins = family history (usually 14-year-old mother's name and a shortlist of possible fathers) tax records = usually an empty file Kappa tracksuit inventory (usually 3 meg file) We regret any inconvenience it may have cause if you received a copy of the Scottish edition. You may return it to Microsoft for a replacement version

Even the mighty Star Trek falls foul of the Scottish Accent http://www.weehowff.com/taysiders.wmv (slow to load but well worth the wait)

The trick is to give them the tellys and then limit them to endless re-runs of 'Pets Win Prizes.' Or some Richard O'Sullivan sit-coms HAHAHA nice one teddy ..I like that

here's what I got The Great Archives determine you to have gone by the identity: Maharaja of Scandanavia Known in some parts of the world as: Father of The Cursed The Great Archives Record: The cursed and the curser - bringing downfall and ill favour to kings and peasants alike! now Father of the Cursed..how cool is that !!! Buggern ' bollox..forgot to log in that was me on the post above

Me 3 too many misshaps, just for the sake of getting someone for a crime.

AGAIN !!!! (Locks away tackle for safety purposes)

Hi TickTock, welcome to the DL, pull up a chair, sit down and enjoy yourself...ohh and we all have the party hats ready for Mrs T, well up here in Scotland anyhoo

If he want's my current one he can have me !!!

heheehhe OOps seems I'm gonna outlive my wife by 11 years...sorry babe

I gotta agree I've never heard of him either, not very well known seems appropriate to me too.

well at least you'll never have to waste money and buy alcohol again, you'd be permanently pissed !!

I predict James Garner of Rockford Files fame for 2006... just a feeling !!

I'm going for 11:35 PM - (Precise mode ON). Luv da Deathclock Yeti...hehe nice one Also I think this is my 40th post WOOHOO that's a record for me in ANY forum !!!

Sell your soul to the devil, then when he comes to collect, tell him Ozzy sent you, at which point he will say " Ohh sorry, I didn't realise you were one of his mates" at which point he'll use any excuse to buy you a big mac, chips & a shake! Also watch out for the regular Xmas card

To be honest I think if he gets done this time he will possibly end up commiting sideyways, I don't think there's many more places he can run to, so maybe an early 2006 contender.

Well...I gotta agree I think Mr Rickman is a good actor, in fact I think he's one of the best that Britain has ever produced...tho I don't see him in the same light as the ladies do...and on that note...there does seem to be a shed load of Male attractions for the ladies on this forum...I wanna see more stuff for the boys !!! whaddya think guys ??

I'm truly a JD fan too but I prefer it with Coke

Deffi a cover up, she knew too much and had to be....removed

Personally I think the worst part about this whole story is that apparently he was diagnosed positive then he's cured.... What about this..... The people who tested him say they got it correct originally...What if they actually got the samples mixed up...That means there is some poor bugger out there with AIDS and doesn't know it !!!!!

B if ya look really, really close you can just make out Johnny D sayin'...I'm gaggin, I'm gaggin. and for the interested parties it's 0800 do me, do me !!! Enjoy

B I just phoned johnny Depp about his availability for Deathlist - The Movie, He say's he'll do it.. BUT....only on the condition that it's about Deathlist - The Band, and he has to get the part as the lead guitarist. He say's it's the only way he can get the girls and that he's not been laid in years !!!!