The Pooka

Clarissa - there is enough here to keep teams of psychiatrists active for months. As far as stalking goes, you seem to be Real Madrid to my Hartlepool United.

I have no idea but I am prepared to wait for the god-like pulphack to confirm or deny.

Tempus, if you were president, how would you want to kill Bin Ladin? He can't be shot because then he would die thinking he's Jesus. I say we have a big circus in Yankee stadium. Tickets, pocorn, and we hang the sum bitch. All the money that is raised goes to the kids who lost there parents. Then I would put his death on every radio station, and every telivison channel in Iraq. I wouldn't kill him, I'd dress him in a fluffy yellow chick costume and make him perform to the Birdie Song on prime time TV. Possibly followed by Agadoo with all the correct actions, that should nicely destroy his credibility. Yep. Immerse him in all that's best in western culture. 'dem gud am lidl yellah bas tuds weer goinduhSIVILEYEzum'

Know where she lives? Errrrr........ no. And I certainly wouldn't know if its the sort of place where one could log on wirelessly using a laptop while crouching in a hydrangea bush - so don't even ask! As for Doctors, this is complete news to me. I shall be watch ......... sh*t - they've let the dogs out - catch you later.

Shame. I loved the bass on Mr Big.

That's superb - as soon as it finished I watched it all over again. Its also given me an idea as to how I can get access ....... perfectly legally. Disguised as a piano tuner? Brilliant! .... or as a piano. I have a great set of teeth give or take a few black ones.

That's superb - as soon as it finished I watched it all over again. Its also given me an idea as to how I can get access ....... perfectly legally.

Pepe Poupee is legally blind and not fit enough to travel. Unlikely to get an obit though What is illegal blindness......... and what's the usual punishment? Someone should be making an example of those buggers.

.... and 'ofas' to you too my lad....... in a restrained English kind of way.

Not amazing really Clarissa. Very little exciting has happened in England since the Wyatt scandal ...... 'cept maybe an Ashes victory. The idea of pooling resources for nefarious purposes is a cunning and attractive ruse. We must work on the details. I see from other posts that more secrets from those years are emerging. We are all indebted to you and Am I Dead Yet. I have previously advocated the creation of the University of the Deathlist and the emergence of further research from the listers does nothing to dissuade me from pursuing this. My own research was, sadly, interrupted some years ago when, having disguised myself as a journalist from the People's Friend I persuaded La Wyatt to attend an interview over a candlelit supper. Unfortunately, just as the divine Tessa started to open up about the O'Sullivan years, I leaned forward and my false beard ignited. Needless to say I was roughly ejected by the bouncers - so to speak. Hence my more clandestine, and much misunderstood, pursuit of Ms Wyatt in recent years.

BITCH DONT TALK ABOUT THE TONGAN KING LIKE THAT FOR I COME OVER THEIR AND KICK YOUR ASS. Well technically he's not the Tongan king because the old c***'s dead. But I'll respect your wishes.

LMFAO!!!!!!!! It really says something about the state of a forum when the guests are funnier than the members... Jimbobthegreat LMFAO on U2 Jimbob. Yo!

Nice pastiche MPFC. On the other hand a Cumbrian at 11 minutes past closing time may always write that way.

You are right, of course, TF. However, Lady Clarissa is Australian and, frankly, where cuisine is concerned anything goes with that crowd. Perhaps a little Vegemite would hit the spot. I do hope she comes back tomorrow - she seems quite a sport.

Actually guest I have attended a number of post mortems. They really are quite convivial affairs though, I have to say, its often a few days before I can tackle a mixed grill again. I'm glad to see that Mr. H appears to be making a good recovery. Nobody here wishes anyone dead (well not the unlisted ones), but, at the end of the day, the game is bigger than any of its players.

I shall look out for you Ladyy Clarissa. That'll be me in the escallonia bush. I have cleared a little patch for you in the privet and left a complimentary bag of Quavers and bottle of Dandelion and Burdock. While we're on the topic are you, by any chance, acquainted with Ms Wyatt?

Good idea. I have just placed an oiled seabird on my head and will turn up tomorrow claiming to be Tony Blackburn.

James. You seem to be a long way from home.

Which one? Most of us can only name one. If I were a gambling man I wouldn't mind a list of runners and SPs.

Having perused the delights of the Trashcan, the only post of yours relating to Huntley is one that quotes from others, and contains nowt else. Which is why MH deleted it. What happened to the rant, maybe you imagined it. I said that it too easy for him to allow him choice over when and how he died. His victime had no such luxury. I went on to say that his fate should be decided at length by committees who would, over many years, constantly change their minds: reprieving him, re-condemning him etc. I suggested that the whole exercise would be based on Kafka's 'In the Penal Colony'. In the end he would be executed moments after being notified of his release. It was posted a few days ago and was definitely there in the last 24 hours. Does anyone remember it. Am I going mad? Now I know what must have happened, your reply to Handy's post got included in her quote. In other words it looked like your reply was really her post. You buggered up with the quote function. I'll correct it and restore to this thread So I won't need the anti-psychotic medication after all.

Having perused the delights of the Trashcan, the only post of yours relating to Huntley is one that quotes from others, and contains nowt else. Which is why MH deleted it. What happened to the rant, maybe you imagined it. I said that it too easy for him to allow him choice over when and how he died. His victime had no such luxury. I went on to say that his fate should be decided at length by committees who would, over many years, constantly change their minds: reprieving him, re-condemning him etc. I suggested that the whole exercise would be based on Kafka's 'In the Penal Colony'. In the end he would be executed moments after being notified of his release. It was posted a few days ago and was definitely there in the last 24 hours. Does anyone remember it. Am I going mad?

I just hope that the drugs that Huntley took caused some damage to either his liver or kidneys or possibly both and that he'll have several years of pain and suffering from the effects of that. Depends what he took. If they were anti-depressants, and the papers say they were, there are two main types. Tri-cyclics, which are old-fashioned, and cause cardiac arrhythmias in overdose. But once they have worn off he'd be OK in the longer term. Its unlikely they'd prescribe these in a prison. The modern types are SSRIs (like Prozac) and 29 of them wouldn't do much harm. I note that my earlier post advocating a long slow death has been expunged. Was it that much of a rant?

pulphack - I am so impressed. You have lived my dream. I will build a shrine to you in my shed (next to the Tessa Wyatt tribute statuette). I have to confess that I have recently bought the Bumpers LP on e-Bay. It really has nostalgic significance to me as it was my introduction to 'progressive' music. (Another interesting fact about Koro is that guys would push sticks through their penises to stop them being sucked back into their bodies. I employed the more western technique of inviting women to maintain my penis' eternal prominence through suction. Needless to say my culture-bound psychiatric disorder was overlooked and, like you, I was left to the mercy of the magistrates.)

I hope I am not alone in thinking 'Bottom' to be the worst comedy ever. At least the likes of 'On the Buses' had no pretensions. Edmondson and Mayall should have known better.

Sorry - but daughters rather than cordless phones are the problem. There is a button on the cordless phone holster that sets the phone off so that you can find it if lost. I have taken to pressing it in the early hours just to get revenge on the girls for keeping the phones in their rooms. I know............. its not big nor clever.