Youwanticewiththat

Sprouting terrorism panic. Well it is that time of year​

Was watching that last night and was impressed how well it had passed the test of time, better than Wolf Hall in many ways.

Have you been stalking me? Easy, just act like a massive asshole and she will dump you. When you say flatmate, do you actually live in the same flat and she just has the room next door to yours, or does she actually live next door? If it's the first, then this is piss easy, you just do things like get drunk and piss in her wardrobe, or leave porn DVDs in the player, or let her overhear you on the phone to all your other birds. If she lives next door, wait until she's home one night and then bang another bird really loudly up against your adjoining wall, while shouting 'THAT'S IT, AUNTY MARGARET, TAKE IT TO THE HILT IN YOUR BACK DOOR YOU FUCKING DIRTY OLD BITCH'. She will be kicking you in the bollocks and telling you to fuck off in no time. Brilliant haha!Unfortunately she has turned out to be a bit like Glenn Close in Fatal attraction.At least I don`t have a rabbit:P She lives in the room next door but we share a kitchen. Well that's even better - take some selfies of you shitting in a saucepan and wanking into her fromage frais, and post them on her Facebook wall. She will be running for the hills before you can say 'can I have one phone call to my brief please' Sadly if she follows the FA model that shit in the saucepan will be turned into your next Bolognese and the Fromage Frais will be her face cream of choice.

I think that might make him my Brucie Bonus for 2016

Lost his appeal...in so many ways! http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-34843963 Even a Werther's Original wouldn't help these days.

He may have had a Cannula inserted into a vein in his hand to administer drugs, that can sometimes cause the bruising. Or friction burns from a passionate wank recalling his days swinging with the Krankies Thanks Mary I just spewed over my keyboard.

So when the Russians start bombing again will it be (cue the swelling strings) From Russia With Love....sorry..sorry..so very sorry

Doubt it as he says he no longer tests positive.. That'll be the Tiger Blood

But on the plus side..Sheerness, Gillingham, Chatham, Rochester...'twould almost be a public service.

Just a ring pull and a trail of crumbs.....

He doesn't necessarily have Ebola. The text says that this ward is for any highly contagious disease, not just Ebola.He doesn't necessarily have any other highly-contagious disease either. The text also says "He was taken to the Lyme Building where there is a less public entrance than the main ones", probably for security reasons. Though of course, he may be seriously ill. Carelessly dropped the soap a few too many times...that'll teach him to use a less public entrance. "Overdosed on chocolate" according to Vince Hill. Shouldn't these be in the Rolf Harris thread btw? Hardly surprising is it.Its not like he can tempt any children with a bit of choccy now,is it. He may as well eat the fucking lot. how did he get the chocolate in jail It was the only place the other lags could hide the razor blades.

He doesn't necessarily have Ebola. The text says that this ward is for any highly contagious disease, not just Ebola. He doesn't necessarily have any other highly-contagious disease either. The text also says "He was taken to the Lyme Building where there is a less public entrance than the main ones", probably for security reasons. Though of course, he may be seriously ill. Carelessly dropped the soap a few too many times...that'll teach him to use a less public entrance.

Guess he didn't tie his kangaroo down properly...

Ding Dong etc. Just 'cos its been awfie quiet.

Isn't she just, i know we all die one day but you wouldn't put it past Zsa Zsa to buck the trend, really wouldn't surprise me if she surpassed Jeanne Calment and became the world's oldest ever person on 21st July 2039, of course she will die tomorrow now i have said that but in all seriousness she has a remarkable constitution to keep going after having so many illnesses she is as strong as an Ox. A one-legged, bed bound, demented Ox perhaps Sadly I'm sure there's a market for that....

He looked pretty good to me when he layed his wreath.Old but fairly physically robust for a 94 year old. Thought he was a ghastly colour - even with the slap that had clearly been applied. In my top ten for 2016.

Even Dupont can't afford the quantity of KY necessary to achieve that Mary.

With a tongue like his, he'd lick your liver clean. How's about a Death List Christmas Book? 101 Uses of a Stiff Harry Styles. Brace yerself Cat

Indeed there were... but one rainy day at Lords in 1977 those brogan Aussies rounded up the straggler spectators when rain stopped play and spent a couple of hours teaching us Aussie Rules..sheer joy. Mind you I've never seen a man (who shall remain nameless) run so fast when he found out I was only 13 at the bar. Still, at least he ran....ah the 70s....

If only they'd given the role to me! Darfur Orphan.

Mea Culpa Dr_T, and I sincerely hope the selection committee pass him over.

Wash yer mouth out Lardy; 'tis well known the Mistletoe and Wined One pours rainbows out of his fundament. BTW is Mistletoe a version of cameltoe for ladies of a certain age?

Perhaps an article of Cliff Richard's kitten shaving activities or Boris Johnson's Puppy Farm (he's the stud).

How's about John Edrich as an opener? Watching C & E being pummelled by the WI was a disturbing intro to Cricket for a child. West Indies not Women's Institute..that's a whole other game.

Switched from Zsa Zsa to Vera; so that's zsa zsa next