Magere Hein

I hope you're as wrong with that one as you were with earlier predictions about the Dutch side. regards, Hein

Most of the time it is. But I am concerned about the power of the ladies forum. What if its members unleash hell? We'll probably never notice. regards, Hein

Close, but no dog-end. Anyway, that wasn't too hard. Next station: Chile or Brazil, probably the latter. That will be hard. regards, Hein

Senator Robert Byrd has died aged 92. Will anyone in Congress notice the difference? regards, Hein

Today in 1296 Floris V, 15th count of Holland, was murdered by Gerard of Velzen. regards, Hein

Or he's a valley girl. So gross. Totally. regards, Hein

Not someone I heard of before but rather because not many Poles get mentioned on these pages: Polish lightweight boxer and 1960 Olympic champion Kazimierz Paździor died yesterday at age 75, according to Wikipedia. This news has a Polish sport web page, which I can't read but which looks like an obit, as its source. regards, Hein

Does 1-0 qualify as a solid Dutch win? I suppose a win is a win. A win is indeed a win, and I'm delighted with the result. The match was disappointing, though. The Japanese chanches to equalise the score were scary, considering that the Dutch strikers aren't exactly productive. I should've put Sneijder in my fantasy football team. I'll swap him for Van Persie as soon as I can. regards, Hein

Such incompetence ought to be a capital crime. regards, Hein

Considering your previous success in prediction I expect a solid Dutch win. I've been told Japan's coach Takeshi Okada is confident his side will win. Should that happen, there's the consolation that the Dutch aren't the only ones to fail miserably at the World Cup. regards, Hein

Mobile phones belong in Room 101, or rather their users. I appreciate that mobile phones have their uses in emergencies and that mad people who spend the day talking to themselves loudly in the streets have benefitted greatly by removing the social stigma. The problem with phones is that they turn even the nicest person into a sociopath. People find a ringing telephone much more important than real people. A few years ago I was in Amersfoort train station, buying a paper at the news stand between switching trains. A young man, whose task it was to sell it, was on the phone, judging by the sounds he made with his sweetheart. Putting the newpaper (a Volkskrant) on the counter had no effect, so I waved it in front of his eyes, which similarly failed to cause a reaction. Since he was using an old-fashioned telephone I could simply disconnect his converation by pushing the appropriate buttons on that infernal machine, give him money and extract change before he had time to realise what I had done. When he started yelling I was well out of the door. Unfortunately this doesn't work with mobile phones. When you're in a conversation and your partner's mobile phone starts emitting its horrible ring tone you cease to exist until the call is completed, which may well take the rest of the day. A few weeks ago that happened in a business meeting I attended. When I politely asked the perpertator to switch the bloody thing off for the rest of the meeting she reacted with indignation. The thing went off again within a minute, and she again answered, which prompted me to walk out of her office. I met her some ten minutes later at the coffee machine, where she apologised and switched her phone off. We finished our meeting in relative peace. I hate mobile phones. And yes, I have one. regards, Hein

Hmmm, so with all the surgical comings and goings, her vagina will have a story to tell, then. Dutch has a perfect word to describe them: kutsmoezen (actually slang for silly excuses). regards, Hein

More importantly, he needs shooting. A vicious machete cut-up is also acceptable. regards, Hein

If I had a say in such matters I'd feed her corpse to the dogs, if the dogs would eat it. regards, Hein

I guess this means they'll be laying Cable in a few days.His mum's name is Mabel. Mabel Cable. Let me guess: his brother's called Abel. regards, Hein

Fascinating creatures all, but I'll go for 'roos, 'cause that's the only one on the menu that I've eaten. From a reliable source (William Bligh, of HMS Bounty fame) I know that Echidna is also good tucker, but they weren't available for dinner when I was in Sidney. Ayers Rock or Uluru? regards, Hein

Telling porkies again? regards, Hein

Hein's Heroes just joined Deathlist World Cup 2010. I'll win, of course. regards, Hein

I suppose the student has a point: regards, Hein

World famous in Belgium: Belgian sports hack Jan Wauters dies. (Links to Dutch news article) regards, Hein

Last minute, of course. Too early is a waste of time. Chess or poker? regards, Hein

Strange stuff. Shooting the sollicitor I understand. One might even make the case for a law that gives everyone who hires a sollicitor gets the right to shoot him/her when he/she loses the case. That would justify the sollicitor's rate. Shooting a relative over what appears to be an inheritance case doesn't make sense. I don't know UK law in this respect, but under Dutch law such an action would disqualify the heir. Shooting colleagues and unknwon bystanders makes even less sense. regards, Hein

Ooh, with the Tour de France coming up... So voted. regards, Hein

I don't like them as a duo, but Simon made a few nice songs as a solo artist, which can't be said about Garfunkel. Wild plants or wild birds? regards, Hein