TQR

Sleet in Essex. Sod all else. I'm dreadfully disappointed.

My predictions: 1. JoeMoneyPenny Vs. Pedro: I'd say Pedro out of the two. As drol would testify, Tinsulanonda and particularly Anh aren't going anywhere. 2. Nantonian 2013 Vs. Maryportfuncity: Put money on Maryport. Then put money on him beating either myself or Phil in round 2. 3. Gooseberry Crumble Vs. John Key: John Key. Good selection. I see they both ill-advisedly picked Leah Bracknell, though. Respect. 4. Spade Cooley Vs. Squonk: This should be Spade's. But you never know, stranger things have happened; It's not as if Squonk's team is full of pictures of health. 5. Dr T Vs. markb4. Oops. So Mark hasn't won yet. And, looking at Dr T's team, probably won't. 6. Banana Vs. Great Uncle Bulgaria: Banana has picked lots of people I don't know. Maybe that means he's onto a winner? 7. Yorkshire Banker Vs. Skinny Kiltrunner: SK, no question. Sorry YB. 8. Alt Obits Guy Vs. Time: AOG clearly did his research. I'd bet on him, purely as Time picked the everlasting Kirk Douglas. 9. Clorox Vs. Fixed Business: The bleachman has this one, I reckon. 10. The Mad Hatter Vs. Exu: Very Close. Once again, probably the Kid edges it purely on the basis that Exu went for Kirk Douglas. (I'm going to look like such a prat if he dies now). 11. Master Tech Vs. Bibliogryphon: I've got a feeling Biblio will snatch it. Bracknell, RBG and De Havilland have potential to stick around for a bit too long for MT. 12. The Unknown Man Vs. Boudicca: Almost too close to call. I thought Bou's R O'Donnell was Rosie for a blissful minute. Disappointed it's not, so I'll go Unknown Man. 13. Torva Messor Vs. The Old Crem: TOC's Katie Price pick is inspired. Wishful thinking says TOC, but I reckon Torva might have it. 14. The Quim Reaper Vs. BuffaloPhil: Hmm. Still convinced my picks that died in January have knobbed me over. But who knows? 15. Wormfarmer Vs. The Old Lady: This really could go either way. Wormy has more plausible picks, but my gut says Old Lady might have a couple of surprise points with her team.

I'd like to write the foreword to her book. And any chapters she lamentably doesn't live to finish.

Congrats @Bibliogryphon on becoming a sexatwunt. Not only does this mean twunt x6, it'd also make a great Tinder profile name. Either way, well done

Hmm, call me a traditionalist, but I very much miss the old format 1) Leah Bracknell (3 pts) 2) Paul Flynn (4 pts) 3) Nobby Stiles (4 pts) 4) Murray Walker (5 pts) 5) Ruth Bader Ginsburg (3 pts)

Makes me want to fucking emigrate. (Not to Sconnie Botland, though.)

So, in another shambolic day in Brexitland, my understanding has it that Theresa May can't blame this disaster on the people who caused the disaster because it would relegate the Tories to obscurity for decades. So to avoid a disaster for the Conservative party, she's conspiring with the people who caused the disaster to blame the disaster on the EU, securing the support of the British media which very much has a hand in this disaster. Still, it's good satire innit.

You can never escape your origins! Welcome back, Rad.

Shit on it. If only I was as good at picking survivors in this pool as I am at picking survivors in pools where you want the cunts to die.

Formula E. First season I've watched it. Three races in, I've seen more exciting racing than in the last 10 years of F1.

Welcome! And Grandfather of Stephen123 is clearly doing extremely well, I wish him all the best! I’m sure he’ll be knocking about for years yet; maybe get him to join the site for himself?

Tatties? Git tae fuck. Neaps? Git rid o’ that shite. Haggis? Och aye! My dinner was crumbled haggis, fried in butter, in a crusty roll with a drizzle of tomato ketchup. Washed down with some crisp Chenin Blanc rather than a dram of whisky. Yep. In my dreadful English way I accidentally went some way to un-Scottish this auspicious Scottish occasion. Very sorry. Sláinte Mhath!

I've been thinking of any old streets in a metropolitan area...then I looked up Transmetropolitan, saw it was some kind of comic book, and subsequently gave up immediately.

Tiggy Walker gave an update and a pic of him on Twitter earlier. Not too much of a cause for concern; he's back in March and doesn't look overly fucked out.

Moron.

Some prick in ‘murica who made a living out of being a ‘gay conversion’ therapist comes out as gay after 34 years. Clearly worked well, didn’t it? Cunt.

This is...several different shades of wrong. Someone has remixed Smells Like Teen Spirit in a major key, and interestingly it now sounds a bit like a pop-punk track from 2000.

This is the politest pre-match trash talk I’ve ever been part of.

Since sending our illustrious host my starting 11, 2 have died in just as many days, one of whom was my joker. I’d just like to congratulate BuffaloPhil on his imminent victory over me; it’s apparent I’ve done my bollocks early doors.

RBG: 1st April 2020

First hit of the year. DL 0-1 Quim. Kind of goes against my normal picks in terms of how widely known they are, but he's a DL forum icon so I couldn't resist. Sadly, the Seer was going to be my joker in the DL Cup, so that's pissed me off.

Ta! I’m shocked. Genuinely.

WOW Sounds odd, but this is one of the most shocking deaths of the decade.