I’m late, I’m late, I’m very, very late. We are almost halfway through January, and I’ve only just finished getting everything together to officially start this pool. Damn this working-for-a-living business taking up all of my time. I need to retire and take up professional dead-pool hosting – do you think there is any money in it?
Anyhow, we are ready to go – The List of Players and the List of Picks are up on page 1. Jimmy Carter and Johnnie Walker have been substituted out of all the teams. I have finished bashing my head against the wall. Let’s start dead-pooling.
Thanks as always to everyone who entered, and especial thanks to anyone who submitted early and in an easy-to-process format.
The number of players has disappointingly dipped a little this year from last year’s high of 65 teams to a mere 61 players this year. Still an excellent turnout, and should make for a very competitive pool. A very warm welcome to the 5 new players who have joined us this year:
@livingbygrace, @ZeldaYT 2003, @Bobytomi, @Tromeand @LWCZ@Funeralopolis
@Young One
Unfortunately, that was offset by the loss of 9 players from last year’s line-up. Some were just fleeting visitors to dead-pooling, others more seasoned players who have just lost the hunger. This is who I am missing from last year - if I have overlooked your entry, please let me know.
@BabyBlue
@chel
@drol
@Ghostofchristmaspast - only one post ever - last years entry in this pool. Deathers?
@Grim Up North - sadly retired from dead-pooling
@Salmon Mousse - hopefully just taking a break from dead-pooling rather than fully retiring.
@Shamalka Amarasekera
@TQR
@Young One
Two players are starting with a shortened team.: @Hell who only submitted 19 names and two subs, and @Funeralopolis who didn't submit any subs and lost Johnnie Walker on December 31st. And if you think that was bad luck, just wait until you see the first update of the year!
While the number of teams has dropped, the number of picks has actually gone up, with 797 separate picks in total, of which 572 were unique. The wider spread of picks was reflected in the list of most popular selections, with Noam Chomsky, Roberta Flack, and Steve McMichael the joint most popular with 20 picks. That would only have been in 9th position last year, when Jimmy Carter was selected by 30 teams. Jimmy almost made the list this year, and would have been the most popular selection being picked by 21 players before his untimely demise 3 days before the start. The team of most popular picks is made up as follows:
BUZZ ALDRIN (16 picks)
DICK VAN DYKE (10 picks)
ESTHER RANTZEN (17 picks)
EVE MARIE SAINT (11 picks)
GENE HACKMAN (9 picks)
GEORG KOCH (9 picks)
HARVEY WEINSTEIN (10 picks)
IAN SMITH (17 Picks)
JAMES WHALE (14 picks)
JEAN-MARIE LE PEN (15 picks)
JOANNE WOODWARD (19 picks)
JOSE MUJICA (9 picks)
LINDA NOLAN (12 picks)
MICHAEL TILSON THOMAS (12 picks)
NIGEL MCCRERY (9 picks)
NIGEL STARMER-SMITH (15 picks)
NOAM CHOMSKY (20 picks)
PETER YARROW (11 picks)
PRUNELLA SCALES (10 picks)
ROBERTA FLACK (20 picks) (JOKER)
STANLEY BAXTER (9 picks)
STEVE McMICHAEL (20 picks)
THEO BURRELL (9 picks)
TIPPI HEDREN (11 picks)
VANESSA REDGRAVE (11 picks)
The big losers this year were Bruce Willis who went from 14 selections in 2024 to 7 selections this year, Edward Duke of Kent who dropped from 12 to 4, and Yoko Ono whose support fell from 12 picks to 5. Rhod Gilbert continued his decline in popularity among dead-poolers and was not selected at all this year, while some players just couldn’t let go of Andy Taylor (1 pick), Kate Keltie (2 picks) and Kat Bjelland (1 pick).
The whims of the Deadpooling Gods became evident again, when after a relatively benign year, they wiped out 7 picks before the game started. The biggest pain-in-the-arse for hosts was of course the demise of Jimmy Carter a few days before the game commenced. So, the late entries all decided to pick Johnnie Walker instead, who inconveniently (for him as well, I’m sure) croaked it on the 31st. From what I can see, the following selections are the non-starters:
Arnolt Rüütel
Charles Dolan
George Eastham
Jimmy Carter
Jocelyn Wildenstein
Jody Gormley
Johnnie Walker
Please do let me know if I have missed anyone.
Sadly (?) Chel is not back this year to attempt a hat-trick of “Who the fuck are they” awards, although I will admit that I do not miss googling various obscure Siberian Chemists and Kazakh geologists. Instead, somewhat controversially perhaps, THE WTFAT? (CHEL) AWARD, is given to @gcreptile pick, journalist Robert Fisk.
Wait a second, I hear you say, haven’t we all heard of journalist Robert Fisk? Yes, you have.
But didn’t he die a few years ago? Yes, indeed he did.
Apparently, there is another one. A Robert Fisk who writes for the Daily Express. You’ve never read his stuff? Of course you haven’t – because it is in the Daily Express.
So now if you google Robert Fisk Journalist, you will get hundreds of articles about the renowned former Independent journalist, interspersed with the very occasional article which are usually headlined “Top Daily Express journalist battles cancer”, all of which of course are written in the Daily Express.
The list of rejected picks (The “Without Exceptional Prominence” WEP-file) shrunk a little this year from 13 to 10. Before any on you pat yourself on the back, remember that we are without the aforementioned Chel who accounted for 4 of last year’s rejects. The rest of you wretches managed to go from 9 rejected picks to 10 this year. Seriously guys . The rejected picks were as following:
Berkin Arslanogullari (WEP) – U-19 player for Union Berlin. I don’t care if someone is signed to a big club. No first team appearances and no international career equals not famous enough, even for this pool.
Eleanor Roosevelt Seagraves (The Killing Time). Family of the Famous. The “Roosevelt” bit seems to be the only thing of note about her. Edited a book, also about the Roosevelts? Nah - I’m not having it.
Isabel Veloso (MalePoster). As I said when the team was posted, “Blah blah blah INFLUENCER, blah blah blah CANCER.” I don’t think any respectable pool allowed her this year, and while this pool is far from respectable, I’m not having her either
Ivan Liubysh-Kirdei (WEP) – Ukrainian Photo-journalist who works for Reuters. Journalists are often a tricky one. Are they famous, or just doing their job? In this case, I doubt we would ever have heard of him had he not been injured by a Russian missile, so he is out. Which is actually doing WEP a huge favour, because he is apparently recovering nicely from his injuries. Perhaps I should have allowed him, just to teach WEP a lesson in why barrel-scraping is not always a great strategy.
James Butts (LivingbyGrace) – “Tech-executive” or “Entrepreneur” apparently. Also “Senior vice president of product and design at Postmates” according to Google. Not nearly prominent enough for my liking – if he didn’t have cancer, he would be just another businessman
Luigi Mangione (The Killing Time). Christ on a fucking bike. I make it very clear that “famous for being a criminal” types are not allowed, and this is what I get.
Mehmet Ali Agca (RadGuy). Pope-shooter. This is the only one of these that I really had to think about. Obviously famous for being a criminal, and my wife has never heard of him. However, the shooting of Pope John Paul II was such a historic event, that perhaps it should have been enough to let him in. Anyway, decision is made, but I can understand why RadGuy might be a bit salty about it.
Robert Mailman (GcReptile). Canadian victim of miscarriage of justice. Not so much “Famous for being a criminal” as “Famous for not being a criminal”. Miscarriage of Justice cases might certainly be famous enough for selection (the Birmingham 6 for example would be probably be allowed), but they will still go through the “Wife Test”. She says no.
Sean Wallace (GcReptile). Assistant coach Southern University football team. He was not allowed last year, due to a lack of fame. It’s fair to say that he has not gotten any more famous since.
Sidney Cooke (Imelda). Disqualified under the “Famous for being a criminal” rule. Some day you will all learn – my wife has not heard of many criminals.
There were quite a few others who scraped through after some thought, and on a different day they might have been rejected. These include:
Felix Wittmann – German U-23 800-metres champion. Had Olympic ambitions, so probably reasonably well known in Germany. And he is not going to die this year, so maybe this will be WEP’s lesson.
Gregor Formanek. Former Nazi guard facing trial in Germany. On the one hand, “Famous for being a criminal”. On the other hand, I allow Holocaust-survivors and Allied Veterans, just on that basis alone. So, from a historic perspective, being a Nazi guard is probably enough to allow him in. And yes, I do see the inconsistencies.
Iain Liam Ward (“Internet Personality”). Yes, definitely “Famous for being ill”. However, his fundraising seems to have gotten a lot of publicity, including on CNN and in the New York Post, so I think that just about scrapes him over the line. And I wanted to steal him for my Irish theme team in the DDP, so I’d feel bad about excluding him here.
Kitty Dukakis – Wife of former Presidential candidate Michael Dukakis. “Family of the famous.” And there is precedent for disqualifying wives of Governors, with Gloria Deukmejian not allowed last year. However, Kitty seems to have achieved a certain level of fame of her own in the US, largely for her alcoholism, but also for her work promoting ECT for treating mental illness.
Paul Sawyer – “Warlord Games author” and “White dwarf” editor. I started to read a bit about the gaming world to try to ascertain his level of fame. I very rapidly lost the will to live, and just thought “fuck it, I don't care - he can go in”.
So, that’s it. On with the game, and best of luck to everyone, not least the poor buggers who are among the 797 names picked!
