Madame Defarge

I may have to print this off and frame it. I wrote one for you too. NAP's effort is obviously top shite in the Windsor category, but here it is : The sun rose blazing purple and the sky was minty green Windsor got a letter from her Majesty the Queen. Tripping over hedgehogs, He ran out in the rain The buses were all broken So he had to take the train. When he got to London A happy crowd was there Crying out his name And trying to touch his hair. As pigs flew in the clouds above And townsfolk cheered and cried, The palace doors did open And Windsor went inside. Hear the trumpets blaring! See the banners roll. For Windsor’s been inducted to The Order of the Troll.

Very well, but someone has to do it. Love Song to an Ailing Celeb Oh my darling Kim Jong il Do with me what e're you will, Whilst I caress thy turnip head, And trembling, lead thee to my bed. Wait a minute , don't you dare!! You know I'm still a virgin there! For all your brass, you're just a churl And I am not that kind of girl!! And look at this, of all the nerve! Thou loathsome wrinkled dried up perv, You've left a hickey on my thigh What will I tell the other guy? In fact, I really wish you'd die, Kim Jong Il.

yes it has to be cloyingly sentimental my dear notapotato but sappiness is simply not enough a crap poem must also be completely devoid of rhyme or rhythm and authored by a w***er Who once experienced an emotion and Was so surprised by it that he or she as the case may be Immortalised it for all the world to see in an outburst of prose separated arbitrarily by Line breaks and paragraphs And called it a poem ( bonus points awarded if family values or patriotism are mentioned )

At the point where one is presented with this most prestigious of all awards:

Thanks, LFN. For a non-genius, I'm okay. At the end of sixth grade my class took an I.Q. test. I never found out my score, but the next year I was assigned to a class populated by 16 year old juvies, children with severe mental disabilities, untreated cases of galloping ADHD, and other ne'er do wells. I had a BLAST in there, but the evidence does kinda point to the fact that I just possibly might not be Mensa material.

I like this one.

lol! A welcome antidote to the ''get well soon'' rhyme! It saved me a trip to the store to buy Alka Seltzer, thanks Windsor!

I'm sure it was unintentional but you forgot to credit the author, Joanna Fuchs.

Chim chiminey Chim chiminey Chim chim cher-ee! you ran on home and went in without me. Chim chiminey Chim chiminey Chim chim cher-oo! You didn't want me but I still fancied you, Broke into your chimney, Got stuck in your flue.

I took that to mean a medical sort of distress, as in 'respiratory distress', although my interpretation might be slightly biased due to the fact that I chose September 5th.

Five not alive.

I first posted as guest Madame Defarge and then finally registered a few days later. Tempus Fugit had recently gone missing and there was some speculation as to whether or not I might be his sockpuppet. In my first post as a member, I put everyone's doubts to rest by confessing that I was actually Millwall32.

I joined in 2006. Around that time there was an influx of new noobs accompanied by a whole lot of chatter from other posters about how the old Deathlist was dying. It reminded me of the oft repeated trope of summer camp movies. "Gee, it's no fun this year, last year the kids were better, the food was better, the counselors were cooler, there were't any mosquitos and the food didn't suck". So at least once a year or thereabouts, it happens on the forum. It's a Deathlist tradition. My contribution to this year's trope: Er..It would be nice if Anubis the Jackal posted more.

Assuming that there are no preemptive strikes or other global faux pas before or especially after August 21st when Iran's nuclear thingy gets loaded with fuel, I choose September 5.

Not as quiet as it will be when he gets tired of it and leaves. ........ Citizen #1: It sure is quiet around here. Citizen #2: Aye. *crickets* Citizen #1: What was that fella's name, you know, that fella with the opinions? Citizen#2: Um. Windsor. Citizen#1: Right, right, Windsor. Citizen#2: It sure is quiet around here. I wish something would happen. *crickets* BTW, was this the same, uh, friend who doesn't want you to post on his facebook wall because his mother-in-law reads it?

How have you been feeling lately, David? Is it rosacea or hypertension behind that beguiling blush? I hope you can forgive me for asking these somewhat personal questions, but you've already shared so much of yourself with your Twitter followers and millions of Adbots so I don't think you'll mind. Since you are under 60 years of age, your tragic and untimely demise would be worth 9 points, and an additional 5 points if you should pop your clogs on May 14th.

Speaking of legs, what is wrong with this picture with Kim Jong-il at front and center? Can you see it? Answer is here.

He may be getting a transplant soon. What for, a soul? He's already had an arsehole transplant, although the arsehole rejected him Not likely. He already has more horcruxes than Voldemort.

He may be getting a transplant soon.

But I'm allowed a last visitor, right? And that will be you, bringing me a large Bible missing enough pages to conceal a flask of vintage Old Fitzgerald Bourbon. I'll try to drink it quickly while you divert the guard. Well done! All of my favorites, except the Funyons because of the aftertaste. I'll have this when the governor calls with a stay of execution.

Going my own way, usually followed by an unpleasant collision involving something hard (reality, for example). Compromise, or holding out for undiluted victory?

Bob Sheppard , former NY Yankees PA Announcer , is dead at 99.

Well. At least it's brief. Any clues within as to when he'll buy the Patriotic and Revolutionary Farm, or pop his Great and Innovative Clogs?

To an extent that is always true. Pages are cached, etc.... Facebook does offer an account deletion option but you really have to look for it. They put your account in "deactivated" status for 14 days and if you don't touch it during that time it is deleted. If you ever want to rejoin you have to rebuild. I'll y'all know how it works in 11 days. What I do know at this moment is that I am astounded at how much time I spent on Facebook - it's really ridiculous. Okay. Can I follow you on Twitter?

I totally understand this Don't come to Texas. You'll be miserable. Dont come to Norfolk. You'll fucking top yourself. We all talk good in my town, axe anyone!