Lord Fellatio Nelson

I've noticed that the area you say could be like the flag of Finland but I must point out that not only is the Norway blue too dark but the ratio of blue cross is not in the same layout as the real, modern Finish fag. They call for two strips of white (top and bottom) each at four units high either side of a blue band of only 3 units high. (The dims left to right being, 5 units white, 3 units blue then 10 units white.) I'm not going to look at the Thai flag but that may not be right either. You do realise that only you could have possibly posted that RA. I reckon you had the abacus out and was doing computer simulated modules or summat in your lunch hour. Gotta love you fella!!!!!

Was he the one that was sometimes holidaying at Her Majesty's Pleasure? Yeah thats the fella. He was as funny as fook and a wordsmith of Sid Waddell/MPFC proportions.

What ever happened to The Pooka? Who was The Pooka? Anybody?

Holly Willoughby is almost ubiquitous on TV at the moment. She is now touting herself as the new Cilla Black with the unwelcome resurrection of Surprise Surprise. Holly Willoughby is a bit of an enigma. She has one of those faces that screams beautiful or fucking hideous. Her looks matter not tho as, seemingly, if you are married to a TV producer and have big tits, you will get on in the cut and thrust World of television presenting.

As a follow on from my post in the conspiracy theory thread, Id like to put Paris in here. Paris is, erm, Paris. Beautiful in parts and a tourists paradise. Thing is it is covered in graffiti, not just the suburbs but even the tourist areas. The bastards that carry out this defacing even go as far as to "tag" statues, historical buildings/bridges and the like. At least in London they send out teams to clean the crap off but it doesnt seem to be the way in gay Paris. If they dont love their city enough, why should we?

A timely thread, this one. Just got back from a long weekend in Paris where we paid a visit to the Grave of Jim Morrison. The story is, as you all probably know, he faked his death and went to live somewhere weird and wonderful etc, etc. Well I hope he did because his grave is a fucking disgrace. You cant get near enough to it nowdays, primarily to keep the fucktards from scribbling bollocks all over it and making it look shite. Thing is, as seems to be the norm for Paris, graffiti is in abundance near his plot and everywhere else and it all looks utterly shabby. The whole cemetery had the look of something off of a Hammer films production, eerie, dingy and massively crap. Jim, I hope its not you there and you escaped to somewhere where people actually do give a fuck about their City.

One my dad's favourite character actors. Starred in "Robert's Robots", which has a bit before my time but fondly remembered among the older brood... Im afraid I am of that generation who remembers it. It was created by a bit of a legend of Childrens TV, a fella called Bob Block who died not too long ago. He created one of the best Childrens ( and adults) TV shows ever, Rentaghost, so he will always be a legend in my eyes. Im suprised nobody has used that excellent website, that ATJ provided on a recent thread, for potential points scoring. Its a brilliant little A to Z of character actors that have continually worked and barely "rested" more so than most "stars" and never had the recognition to the point that very few people know who they are.

The joke that never gets old...ironically I doesnt get funny either. Shouldn't be so hard on yourself I know but Im just grateful I can still feel it digging into my belly when I wake up in the morning.

The joke that never gets old...ironically I doesnt get funny either.

I guess that when you're in Kent you grab any opportunity for amusement. regards, Hein Well, it's quite funny that the topic of shitting in Kent should have come up while I was away - to cut a long story short - for our long weekend at Brands Hatch for the British Superbikes we stayed at Maidstone Central Travelodge which is, quite literally, a SHIT HOLE. We did not see hide nor hair of a cleaner for three days, and being as we'd lived on takeaway and vastly overpriced beer the whole time, our bowels were not in the best of moods, so, at the risk of providing you with Too Much Information - the bog was not cleaned for three days, and it looked like the start/finish straight at Brands. Rubbish wasn't collected, bed wasn't made, towels weren't replaced, dirty cups not replaced, no tea/coffee left. Also, the manager is a twat - there was a systems problem which meant all the keys for the doors would not work - in order to rectify this, they left a message on our bed to come to reception to sort it out - uh, excuse me for being thick, but if our key won't work, HOW THE FUCK ARE WE SUPPOSED TO GET THE MESSAGE YOU LEFT IN OUR ROOM TO COME TO RECEPTION TO FIX IT? He sounded exactly like Kenny Everett doing Reg Prescott as well, the fucking muppet. So, in summary - do not stay at Maidstone Central Travelodge. Oh dear! Well thats fucked it, i wont be eating that chocolate swiss roll anytime soon now.... Travelodge are the creme de la creme of crap holes. You pay top dollar for utter shite. Anyway, apart from all that, did you have a good time Lardy?

Why did you think of Bobby ..... Handy? What do you reckon will come out about Kirk and what are the rumours about Newman and Cruise? Tell me more!! I don't know really, he just reeks of light entertainment sleaziness, he always seemed to be on Children's Variety Shows years after kids wouldn't know who he was also the wording "appeared on a soap" makes me think the perp isn't known primarily as a soap star. There are loads of rumours about Kirk Douglas being a sleaze and possibly worse (google Natalie Wood or Jean Spangler for more info) The Newman/cruise stuff I'm not sure I believe but word is Paul Newman used to seduce one young man per film he worked on and while most of them knew it was just a fling, Cruise fell for him and had a hard time dealing with being dumped. This is all from gossip sites which is why I'm dubious. Just how many gossip sites do you frequent Handy? I really think you should assume full charge of this thread, you are a font of knowledge or summat. Im pretty sure a high profile member of this forum works for the Beeb, where was he when the whistle needed blowing, eh?

Stop whinging and look at it another way, you can infect every other fucker you come into contact with. Why should you suffer alone? I bloody well WILL whinge. I could have had it ANY WEEKEND OF THE FUCKING YEAR and I get it THIS WEEKEND. I'm off to sit in a field in Kent for two days, so I'm sure ALL THE FUCKING RAIN AND WIND will cure me. All I can say is thank fuck for that, its my eyesight thats going. I though id read that you were off to SHIT in a field in Kent for two days. Take some imodium, just incase. PS: Have fun Lardy!

Why did you think of Bobby ..... Handy? What do you reckon will come out about Kirk and what are the rumours about Newman and Cruise? Tell me more!!

Anybody got any idea which "Soap Star" is being looked into regarding the Jimmy Savile investigation?

Stop whinging and look at it another way, you can infect every other fucker you come into contact with. Why should you suffer alone?

Matthew Kelly ? Matthew kelly is the only person that actually looks more like a peado without a beard than with it . Maybe that was why he got collared on suspicion of being one? Yea no smoke without fire and all . Does sound like Michael Kelly especially the part about him not being on TV because he doesn't make the effort. cmon spade cooley don't be a gossip tease Matthew Kelly was investigated after somebody decided to make a bollocks complaint against him As far as im aware, they delved very deeply into his private life and found fuck all. The only thing he may be is gay ( he was married for years tho) and a gay man is no more likely to be a paedo than a hetrosexual one. IMHO people are just creating smoke hoping the fire will follow and thats just wrong.

Maybe I should rename the thread title to William Thiney? How about William Clinically Obese? Maybe William Anorexic? Nah, best leave it as it is, eh!

Um, he did. Only he had a BBC studio in lieu of a fairground Depends on what you class as ''getting away with it''...he obviously wanted to be remembered after his death and with the JS Trust looking to drop his name (leaving it as the Trust ) , in that respect he hasn't gotten away with it. I suspect that, assuming he turns out to be one of the most prolific paedos of a generation, he certainly will have ticked the box "Remember me, folks". He may well have got away with it if it turns out that there is no life after death and death is just a big switch turning the lights out. Alternatvely, if there is life after death, I suspect that he will be finding things a little bit hot where he is now.

You will be many things but never a Thickey Lardy. Its just a play on words. William HICKEY is a gossip column in the Daily Express ( dunno if it still is tho) its been there for eons and has had a multitude of custodians including Nigel Dempster. Basically a bag of shite. You wouldnt have got it coz you is still young and I is old... Edit: Aye, Elphick was a well known Boozer and survived way longer than anybody would have thought. A "village" up the road? Come on, you mean Tro bro, dont you.

The odds on the Toskvig grope Evens = Lenny Peters (and Lee) 6-4 = George Shearing, jazz pianist 20-1 = Stevie Wonder You get my drift! Where does she say she was groped by a bloke? Good point. Er...........Helen Keller did it.

If ever there was a case for England rebuilding Hadrians Wall and FORCING full independence on Scotland, they are it. Amazingly, they both confessed to being very sexually "liberal" at their peak, both, apparently, up for a bit of jiggery pokery with whoever and wherever ( probably theatre dressing rooms) with the full blessing of each other to play. Just who the fuck did the deed with them!!! Is fame that much of a sexual aphrodiasic and draw?

Im guessing she must have been working with David Blunkett at the time.

Only you could have written that with the gravitas it doesnt deserve. Mary, you fucking legend!!!!!

Is he dead yet?

Wot no Jimmy Savile jokes? Ok then... Savile's ashes are now to be made into an etch-a-sketch so that the kids can still fiddle with his knob. JJB have started selling Jimmy Saville memorial tracksuits. Its an adult size top but you have to squeeze into kids bottoms The BBC News channel just displayed images of three women who claimed that Jimmy Saville sexually assalted them. They showed a recent picture of each woman and a picture taken in the 1970's. The caption read ...." Now then, now then, now then..